


That Which is Human

by PhageChildon



Category: Natsume Yuujinchou | Natsume's Book of Friends
Genre: Blood, Child Abuse, Kidnapped, Past Child Abuse, Stockholm Syndrome, Torture, can't say much more without giving it away, it's a darker fanfic that will still have Natsume being Natsume
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-30
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:35:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 49,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21622327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhageChildon/pseuds/PhageChildon
Summary: No one's mentally prepared as Natsume goes missing, only to be found brutally tortured and comatose in the forest. Even with all the love and support he has, it may not be enough to protect him from the nightmare that's still perusing him, and from his own choices.
Comments: 46
Kudos: 253





	1. Found

The wind wouldn't stop, and neither would the voices. There were more youkai than usual gathered tonight, putting Natori on edge. Normally they made an effort to stay as far away from his home as possible since he was an exorcist. 

But not tonight. The forest a block or so away from his apartment was growing more and more crowded by the second; the same forest where his work party was being held at. After doing everything within his power to get out of attending, his other life was dragging him right back in, preventing him from taking a breather. 

“Natori, you’re here?!” The director of the last project laughed as he came up and hugged him. The exorcist merely let out a courtesy laugh, the other man smelling strongly of alcohol. If he was  _ this  _ drunk, he only had to stay at least thirty minutes before sneaking off in order to investigate why the youkai were gathering. Normally he’d send his shiki to investigate, but he was worried the youkai would jump out and attack the party all at once. Without his shiki at his side, there was no way he could protect them all. 

“Yeah, my cousin’s feeling a lot better and didn’t want me flying out,” he easily lied. Earlier he told them he had a very ill cousin in order to get out of going to this party. His life was always full of lies.

“I’m glad to hear that,” the director hiccuped, nearly throwing up. Natori instantly took a step back, which made the director blush. “Sorry, I’ll be back.” He gagged again before running off, much to Natori’s relief. 

“Hiiragi, Sasago, Urihime,” he summoned, all three of them appearing behind him. “I want you guys to start walking the perimeter-”

“A human you say?” He heard a youkai say rather close to them, though those voices were starting to fade away. 

“Yeah, one with a lot of spiritual energy, enough to make a youkai feel young again!”

“What? Are you serious?”

Natori cursed under his breath as he glanced at the forest. Did someone get lost in the woods? Or did a youkai drag them in?

They said the human had strong spiritual power, yet he didn’t feel any burst of energy from an exorcism, so it couldn’t be an exorcist. 

“Is it gonna hurt us?” He heard the voice quiver. 

“No, it’s injured, so it can’t hurt us.”

Injured? Natori looked around the party, trying to find some excuse to leave. If someone was truly hurt in there, he’d need an alibi in case the police tried to pin everything on him. 

“Master, the dog,” Hiiragi pointed to one tied up against a pole.

That could work.

“Make sure it doesn’t get hurt,” Natori instructed Sasago. Hiiragi untied the dog, and with a few excited barks, it ran into the forest. A few people from the party turned and gasped in shock. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll grab it,” Natori reassured before taking off, hoping he wasn’t too late. Deep down though, he knew he probably was. 

He could really use a vacation after this. 

“Could it really be her?” He heard a youkai gasp with warm excitement. 

“Dozens of them say it is!”

Natori couldn’t help but slow a bit, trying to hear them a little better. A female that was well known by youkai? As weird as it sounded, they seemed fond of the human.

Was that even possible?

“What are you morons doing?!” He heard a new one snap. “Don’t get too close or it’ll control you!”

“What are you talking about? She’d never control us!”

“Of course she would, she’ll even take your name and add you to her book of slaves!”

Natori felt his breath escape his lungs.

Names… they couldn’t possibly mean-

“Wait, everyone wait-” another new voice said, silencing the others. “Do you smell that?”

Natori cursed under his breath as Urihime and Hiiragi flew closer to him, hoping to mask his scent a bit. His fear was rising though, his mind supplying the answer he  _ feared  _ was true.

“An exorcist?”

“Why’s  _ he  _ here?”

“We should eat the damned bastard!”

“No - he might be able to help, Reiko’s in really bad shape!’

He didn’t even realize he started running, his body acting on it’s own.

“He’s running-!”

“He’s going after Reiko!!” A relieved youkai said. 

“You morons, can’t you tell that’s not Natsume Reiko?”

“Oh… you’re right. That’s a male. He’s just as powerful as Reiko was.”

“Tch, if he’s just as powerful why’s he in that sorry state?!” A rather harsh voice barked. “He’d make a good snack!”

Natori’s feet carried him even faster, Hiiragi and the others moving without asking as his fear spiked.  Natsume was here, and he was hurt?? Where was that stupid useless bodyguard of his?

“We won’t let you hurt Natsume!” A new voice protectively said. “He saved us and brought peace to our master!”

The energy was starting to kick up all around them, making Natori curse under his breath. Even more youkai were starting to gather in the forest. Soon it would literally be impossible to get out unscathed. Natsume’s grandmother really made his life way more difficult.

Natsume didn't deserve this.

“Natsume!” He called out, hoping the teen would hear his pleas. Knowing the kind hearted teen, he’d call back even if he didn’t want him involved. He cared far too much for his safety, just as Natori cared about him. 

“Stop it-!” A violent wind forced the exorcist to shield his face, finding it hard to stay balanced as he listened to what sounded like a battle between two youkai start up ahead. It only made his heart drop even further in his chest. Normally Natsume would try doing something reckless to stop the fight, but he didn’t even hear youkai commenting on his actions.

“I’ll kill each and everyone of you for interfering!!”

Why wasn’t Natsume trying to stop the fight? He hated when things got out of hand like this, unless... he was incapacitated.

_ “No, it’s injured, so it can’t hurt us.”  _ He remembered a youkai say.

“Natsume?!” He desperately called out, his shiki running ahead of him, sensing his desperation. Sasago was back, meaning the dog was safe. “Natsume, where are you?!”

“Master-” Hiiragi called, her voice becoming breathless and filled with shock. “Natsume?” She bent down, the foliage hiding her. 

But he saw where she disappeared to. He ran even faster, not even caring about the youkai fighting off to the right, their collisions nearly knocking him off his feet. He almost slipped in the mud when he pushed the large branch hiding Hiiragi out of the way, all the color instantly draining from his face. 

This didn’t feel real - it  _ couldn’t _ be real. It literally looked as if Natsume was nearly beaten to death and left to die in the forest. They even completely tied him up, both gagging and blind folding him so he wouldn't even call out for help or see where he was. 

“Master,” Urihime said, snapping him out of his shock. “If you can’t-”   
“I’m fine,” he quickly responded as he fell to his knees, seeing Hiiragi working the gag off him. There was a huge blind fold around his eyes that nearly covered his entire face while his arms were tightly bound behind his back in the same fashion his legs were tied at the ankles. 

Being this close he could really make out the state his body was in. The white hoodie he normally wore was torn, ripped, and covered in both blood and mud. His blue pants were in a similar state, completely torn to shreds where there were obvious cuts and bruises, along with other wounds that were harder to decipher. He didn’t want to decipher them right now. He couldn’t break down, not when Natsume needed him.

Taking a deep breath, he took out one of his paper dolls and shakingly mumbled a spell, the doll slicing through the ropes that bound him. 

“He’s still breathing, but he’s unconscious,” Hiiragi reassured as she faintly felt his breath brush the back of her hand. The news didn’t reassure Natori as he untangled Natsume’s limbs from the ropes, feeling fury swell seeing how purple his bleeding wrists and ankles were. 

Someone bound him tightly, and of course Natsume struggled. He resisted until he was literally black and blue all over. He was even missing a whole nail and a half on his left hand, though he wasn’t sure if that was from struggling or not.

“It’s… on his neck too,” Hiiragi said quietly. The exorcist’s eyes couldn’t resist looking up and nearly threw up in anger. Now that his face was completely free they could see how swollen his right eye, cheek and throat were. Even his pale lips were cracked and caked with blood.

This was torture. Someone literally tortured and left him to die in the forest.

The amount of anger that filled Natori couldn’t even be described as he pulled his cell phone out and called for help. 

This obviously wasn’t a youkai’s doing. They would’ve simply eaten him after beating him up due to how powerful he was. No, a crime this horrific against someone so innocent and pure could only be committed by a human.


	2. Warmth Amongst the Cold

Of course Natori was questioned by the police. For normal humans, it was very suspicious that he just _happened_ to stumble upon Natsume while running after someone’s dog at the party. Being an actor literally saved him this time. They had actual footage and behind the scene footage that proved to the police that he was somewhere else entirely during the time span of Natsume’s disappearance.

He’d been missing for two and a half days. 

“Natori-!” Touko managed out between her sobs as she pulled him into a hug. Her grip was both tight and weak, her whole body trembling. Natori couldn’t help but hug her tightly back, feeling his own tears welling.

“I’m sorry… I wish I had found him earlier,” he managed to stay composed as he spoke, the two slowly separating. 

“No, we’re just glad you found him in time,” Shigeru said, his voice breaking a bit as he walked up. “We would’ve never found him…” his glasses glared over, his expression impossible to see. Touko brought a hand up to her lips as she desperately fought the thoughts away.

The door to Natsume’s room opened, making them all silently look up at the doctor and Chief of Police. They both looked to Natori, obviously unsure if it was okay to speak while he was there. This would be the first time any of them heard about Natsume’s condition. 

“I’m Doctor Kyosuke, you must be the Fujiwaras,” the doctor said, a very small smile coming to his face. “I’m glad you both made it here so quickly.”

“How is he?” Touko asked as she put her hands together, as if to pray. 

“Is it okay to speak to you with him present?” The doctor motioned to Natori. Natsume’s foster parents immediately nodded, not even thinking twice about it. Not only was he one of Natsume’s close friends, but he was also the one that found their son. 

“He’s in pretty rough shape. He has heavy bruising all over his body, along with deep cuts and even a laceration along his stomach. There’s obvious strangulation marks along his neck that are slightly covered by bruising from what is safe to assume a rope, and he’s missing a nail and a half on his left hand. One looks clean, which means it was removed purposefully. We had to completely remove the other so it can grow back properly. There’s also several small burn marks on his back from what looks like cigarettes next to old ones.” Touko put a hand around her mouth, trying to hold back the sobs that wanted to escape. “Upon further testing, we found he suffered a mild concussion and fractured two ribs. His wrists are severely bruised and cut up and his shoulders were popped out of their sockets. Given this, he was probably strung up somewhere by his wrists for a long period of time.” 

“Thankfully we found no evidence of sexual assault, though his legs are heavily marked up with cuts and bruises. The swelling in his feet has gone down tremendously as well. Since he was found barefoot, they probably kept him like that during his captivity to slow him down if he ever tried to escape.”

No one spoke, the whole hallway became very tense and swirled with negative emotions. The main question that went through their minds was _why_ did someone do this to Natsume? 

“He’s stable, but for reasons I can’t explain, he’s in a light coma.”

Everyone’s hearts stopped.

Natsume… was comatose?

“Wh-what do you mean you can’t explain why he’s in a coma?” Touko said, tears trailing down her cheeks. “Why don’t you know?!”

The doctor sighed. “We’re saying he’s in a coma because he hasn’t woken up or even responded to our tests. We can’t find any medical reason for the coma either. His CT and MRI came back fine along with his blood work. The new concussion he suffered was so mild it probably only made him sick and dizzy, definitely not severe enough to cause the coma. Thankfully, because we can’t find any medical reason for the coma, it means he could wake up any moment.”

Natori’s eyes creased in suspicion, glancing over at Hiiragi who stayed by his side, seeming to share his thoughts. Sure there were people who became comatose for almost no reason, but that was extremely rare. Considering they found him in a forest full of youkai, it was possible a youkai was responsible for it. But in order to prove that, he’d have to examine Natsume himself. 

The Chief of Police took a step forward this time. “I wanted to question Natsume before coming to you, but now that he’s comatose, our options are limited.” The three of them tensed considerably, Shigeru instinctively wrapped a protective arm around his wife. “We have a strong lead on the case. We believe Teppei Hojo hired someone to kidnap and kill Natsume after learning he agreed to testify against him about the Toshiki Hojo case.”

Touko and Shigeru both gasped in horror, tears of fear and sorrow now trailing past Touko’s pale cheeks. 

Natori just stood there, completely horrified and stunned. 

Natsume was going to testify against someone in court? Who were they and what the hell did they do to make Natsume feel the need to come forward and make a scene? Typically he hated being apart of anything that made him the center of attention. 

“A-are you sure that’s why?” Touko’s shaky voice asked. 

“Toshiki Hojo was kidnapped from protective custody on the same day Natsume went missing, meaning there’s a good chance they were taken together. If anyone knows anything about Toshiki, it’s Natsume.” The officer’s eyes glanced back at Natsume’s room where they could see the child still unmoving through the now uncovered window. 

Touko’s legs wobbled as she felt weak. Shigeru immediately held her tightly against himself, trying to form words. “I thought he was in jail,” he said, terribly confused. “Do you think he’ll try sending someone after Takashi once he learns he survived?”

“If he gets word that Natsume survived, more than likely,” the chief hated to admit. “He is in jail, but there’s rumors circulating that he has ties with the Yakuza. Which is why we’re taking extra precautions to ensure no word of this leaves the hospital. We’ll have cops stationed here to be sure no one harms him or the two of you.” 

So many questions were swirling through the exorcist’s mind right now, all of which he knew would be improper to ask no matter how badly he wanted the answers. He felt even more helpless than he did in the forest. 

“Hiiragi,” he whispered so quietly only she could hear him. She didn’t need him to give the order, she already knew what it was. Even if the doctor allowed visitors, it would be improper to go in with the Fujiwaras at first. They needed their own time with Natsume before letting anyone else in.

“I won’t let anyone near him,” she agreed before disappearing.

“You may see him now, just don’t touch him,” the doctor said.

“Do you give Shuuichi Natori permission to visit Takashi Natsume as well? I need the full visiting list before I go.” The chief of police said, to which the two of them immediately nodded. 

“Natori is a precious friend to him, I’m sure he can help us bring Takashi back if he hears his voice.” Touko thought for a moment, an idea coming to mind. “Takashi’s never been good at expressing what he wants to us or his friends. We believe he doesn’t want to be a burden to us, but he doesn’t realize he hasn’t and will never be a burden. I think the more voices he hears calling out to him, the faster he’ll come back to us.” She smiled at the thought, gently wiping her tears away. “If there’s no medical reason for the coma, maybe… he thinks he’s still trapped… afraid to be hurt more. He needs to know he’s finally safe.”

The chief of police and doctor both smiled. “That sounds like a good plan.” The doctor said, handing both his clipboard and pen to Touko. “What are the names of the people you give permission to visit him?”

Of course she knew all their names, phone numbers and addresses. She wrote them in her little book and pulled it out to give the information to him. She even had pictures of them together, to which the hospital staff took a copy of to be sure no one tried to pose as one of them. 

They couldn’t be too careful, not with the rumors of Teppei Hojo being part of the Yakuza. 

“I’m going to call Tanuma and Taki and let them know we found him,” Touko sighed, the exorcists finally noticing the dark bags under her eyes. “I’d hate to hear they’re still looking for him.”

“Good idea,” Shigeru agreed, gently patting her on the shoulder. “Wait until they get here to tell them everything okay? I’ll explain it to them.” His words were heavy. Despite the way his body language hid it, he was exhausted himself.

“Do you mind me asking what’s going on?” Natori asked when Touko was out of earshot, watching the older man take a deep breath, his eyes watching Natsume through the window. 

“Last Saturday, at around noon, there was a knock at the door. When I answered, there were two detectives…”

_“I’m sorry to bother you this fine evening. My name’s Detective Ooishi Kuraudo and this is my assistant investigator Mamoru Akasaka. We were hoping to speak to Takashi Natsume.” The older detective said as they showed their badges. He was a larger tall male with gray hair and tan suit adorned with a red tie while the other was a tad bit shorter, but way more fit. He had dark black hair with dark gray eyes in this lighting wearing a dark blue suit with a green tie. The old one seemed a little impatient in the eyes while the younger one seemed kind and patient; they seemed to be polar opposites._

_“What is this regarding?” Shigeru suspiciously asked. Touko must’ve felt his nervousness because she came around the corner, becoming worried as well._

_“One of the relatives he stayed with is under suspicion for child abuse and other accounts of child endangerment. Since Takashi stayed with him for awhile, we want to question him about his experience.”_

_Touko immediately brought a hand up to her mouth in shock as Shigeru felt his whole body go rigid. They figured Natsume had some trouble with some relatives considering none of them really wanted to take him in, but for investigators to show up wanting to question his experience in hopes of helping another child? It was almost too much._

_“Please, come in,” Shigeru gestured, opening the door more. “I’ll speak to Takashi and see if he’s up for it.” He turned to Touko who was still frozen in place. “Can you lead these two gentlemen into the kitchen?”_

_“O-of course,” she said as they took off their shoes. “Would you like some tea?”_

_“That would be wonderful,” Oishi said as Shigeru ascended the stairs. He wasn’t sure how Takashi would react because he’s never really talked about the time he spent living with other relatives. With how cautious and quiet he was when he first came, and how surprised he was at such small things like a little desert or a simple scarf when it was cold, they weren’t good experiences. Ones they never wanted to bring up in fear of bringing back bad memories._

_He went to knock, but stopped upon hearing Takashi laugh._

_“Oi, that’s not a toy sensei, give it back.” Natsume pleaded, making Shigeru smile a bit as he went to knock-_

_“Not unless you give me manjuu,” an older man’s voice replied, making Shigeru freeze. This was the same voice he heard speaking to Natsume from time to time, but whenever he questioned him about it, the other said it was no one. When they were trying to gain custody of Natsume, his relatives always warned them he would talk or yell at things that weren’t there for attention. One of them even went as far as doing a psychological exam on him in an attempt to get him admitted to a hospital._

_But how could they not hear someone talking with him? They didn’t even take the time to try to understand him. He had a feeling that even if Takashi agreed to testify against this relative, they would require him to take another psychological exam. Maybe it’d be better not to get him involved after all._

_“Takashi?” Shigeru called out before opening the door. Just as he suspected, there was no one else in the room aside from Nyanko Sensei who had some kind of charm in his mouth._

_Natsume tilted his head as he looked up at him, obviously seeing his uneasy expression. “Everything okay, Shigeru?”_

_Realizing he hadn’t spoken yet, he cleared his throat. “We have some visitors downstairs who would like to speak to you. You are more than welcome to decline, we’ll back up whatever decision you make.”_

_Natsume’s face paled considerably as he cautiously stood. There was a hard expression, one he’s never seen before. Was that anger, Shigeru wondered. Was there someone Takashi knew that he didn’t want any involvement with?_

_“Who is it?” He cautioned as Touko walked up from behind Shigeru._

_“They’re two detectives who are investigating a case about a relative you stayed with before coming here. Apparently he’s had his own child and he’s in custody for several accounts of child abuse and endangerment.”_

_The anger left their child’s face in an instant, confusion and fear bubbling forth. Just as they suspected, he looked really uncomfortable as those light golden eyes slowly became their usual glass beads._

_They knew this transition well. He often closed himself off and seemed as if he was in another place entirely._

_“You don’t have to speak with them,” Touko reiterated as she brought a clenched fist up to her chest. “I’m sure the school or one of the child’s friends can answer their questions-”_

_“It’s okay,” Natsume said, his voice calm and collected, not to mention soft. There was a smile on his face, but it was forced. “If their questions can help someone, I’ll do it.”_

_“Takashi-”_

_“I’ll be fine,” he cut her off, smiling even deeper. “Do you know which relative it is?”_

_They both shook their heads. “They wanted to see your reaction to the name in person even though we told them you might not remember much considering you’ve lived with so many.”_

_“I’ll try my best, but it’s like you said, I might not remember much,” he admitted as he gently scooped up Nyanko Sensei and followed them out to the kitchen._

“That sounds like Natsume, wanting to help even if it’s not a happy memory,” Natori sighed, running a hand through his bangs unconsciously.

“It certainly does,” Shigeru mumbled, crossing his arms. “He’s always been so quiet and cautious, as if afraid talking too much will make us mad. As much as we hated the thought, we realized it probably had something to do with the other relatives he stayed with. We even gathered the courage to ask him if some of the others hurt him.”

Natori’s eyes widened a bit in shock. “You did? What did he say?” He was pretty sure he knew the answer; it was probably the same thing Natsume told him. 

“He gazed off into the distance and gave a hollow smile, seeming as if he wasn’t really with us anymore.”

_‘There were a lot of people who were kind at first. No, they were probably all kind people, but having to take care of me probably took a toll on them.’_

It was close to what Natsume told him long ago, granted Natsume would never want them to know he was scared of disappointing them. 

“Did he talk to the police?”

Shigeru nodded. “We were forced to leave the room, but when we came back in, the detectives said they went through very similar things and wanted him to testify against his relative in court.” Shigeru sighed heavily as he pressed a hand against the window. “We had no clue they would come after him before the trial.” Natori’s eyes widened and his heart stopped in his chest. It was bad enough that someone did this to him, but a _relative_ being the culprit? Sure the story wasn’t too unusual for someone who could see youkai, but for them to try to actively kill him? That was absolutely disgusting. 

“Is that bastard behind bars?” Natori cursed, unable to help himself. 

“He is, and was. He hired someone else to do the job, which is why the Chief of Police mentioned the Yakuza.” Shigeru let his hand fall as he rest his forehead against the glass this time. “We thought… letting Natsume testify against the man would bring him some closure while being able to help a child who’s suffering just like he had. We… we had no idea this could - would - happen-!” He stopped, feeling a reassuring hand on his shoulder. 

“It’s not your fault, like you said yourself, no one knew what that man was capable of.” Shigeru looked up at him, his eyes looking so sullen in the lighting. “I know Natsume well enough to know that even in his state, even after the hell went through, he doesn’t regret being able to help that child. In fact, I know he’ll try to dissuade anyone who says he’s not allowed to testify against his relative because of this.”

Touko walked up, listening with more tears gathering in her eyes.

Natori was right, they both knew that. 

“Natsume’s the most selfless, kindest, pure hearted person I’ve ever met. He’s also very strong and determined, and once he has his mind set on something, he does everything within his power to see it through. And it’s all thanks to you two,” he smiled, sniffling himself. “Don’t tell him I said this, but he often wonders if he’ll ever be able to repay you for everything you do for him. It’s because of you that he strives to show kindness even to people who aren’t friendly to him at first.”

Touko couldn’t help it as she let out a single choked breath before smiling warmly. They didn’t get to hear what Natsume thought of them often, and knowing he’s told Natori this meant the absolute world to both of them. 

“He really told you that?” Shigeru asked, earning a nod from Natori. “Takashi… he’s always so quiet and shy… I’m glad he’s happy with us.”

“Master,” Natori stiffened hearing Hiiragi behind him. “I sense a powerful curse coming from Natsume, possibly two. It might be why he’s not waking up.” As much as Natori wanted to hiss at the news, he kept himself together. Knowing there was a curse that could be causing the coma made him feel a lot better. At least he knew how to help with that.

Now he just had to find a way to get in the room and try to determine what kind of curse it was so he could exorcise it. 

“Maybe you two should head in?” Natori asked, relieved to see the Fujiwara’s both nod. 

“You told his friends he’s safe?” Shigeru ask as they turned to the door. 

Touko nodded. “Tanuma said they’d head right over.”

“I’ll wait for them out here,” Natori reassured, hoping that by the time the kids got here, he’d be able to go in and examine Natsume himself.

\----

It’s cold, so cold… he couldn’t remember anything except his own name, but even his own history was a mystery to him.

Misery… he knew he was in misery, that word and emotion kept bubbling forth from the nothingness that was all around him. 

Why was he in misery though? Wasn’t he doing something, something… important…?

 _‘Takashi…’_ a faint soft male voice sniffled.

 _‘I’m so, so sorry-’_ a warm female’s voice cracked this time, their sorrow touching his heart. _‘We’re so sorry, but we’re here now, you’re safe.’_

These people, they were important to him. He’d give anything to make them stop crying and smile even if he couldn’t remember who they were right now. 

His left hand felt warm, so warm he felt tears well in his eyes and he brought it to his chest and held it there, crying softly.

This warmth.... he remembered this warmth. There was one on his shoulder now too.

He felt this recently, didn’t he…?

_He stopped at the closed sliding door that led to the kitchen, unconsciously holding his breath. As much as he wanted to help this child, he felt frozen in fear. What if he couldn't help? What if these people caused problems for the Fujiwaras?_

_What if he lost the Fujiwaras because of this?  
_ _  
_ _A gentle warm hand rest against his own, quickly pulling him from his thoughts. “You don’t have to do this, Takashi,” Touko’s soft voice came as she very gently squeezed his hand. “But it’s awfully brave and courageous of you. Shigeru and I couldn’t be prouder. Even if you decide not to talk to them, we’ll still be proud of you.”_ _  
_ __  
Natsume couldn’t help it as he turned to her, surprised. How could they be proud of him if he was too much of a coward to come forward?  
_“She’s right,” Shigeru said as he gently placed a hand on his shoulder. “Because you had the courage to come forward and attempt to face your past. That takes a lot of strength.”_

_They were both smiling happily down at him, the love literally washing over him. Natsume couldn’t help but blush as he nodded._

_He could do this. He finally had a place to call home, and people who loved him dearly._

_Sliding the door to the kitchen open, he smiled at the detectives and bowed slightly. “I’m Takashi Natsume. I hope I can be of some help.”_

_“Thank you for agreeing to speak with us. I’m Detective Oishi and this is Investigator Akasaka. We’re sorry to drop by out of the blue like this, but we need your help.” Natsume nodded as he sat. Both Shigeru and Touko didn’t sit as they stood apprehensively by the door. They didn’t want to leave Takashi in case the detectives tried to be too invasive, but they also didn’t want him to feel like he had to hold anything back as to not worry them._

_“Do you remember living with your relative Teppei Hojo?”_

_The reaction was instantaneous. For once, Natsume didn’t need to take a moment to remember a name. The fear that coursed through his body by merely mentioning the name drained his face of all color as he glanced over at the Fujiwara’s, not wanting them to know - not wanting them to hear. They didn’t need to know what happened to him in the past - they didn’t need to hear of what happened during his stay with that man._

_Both their faces became concerned, making Natsume realize he was already making them worry._

_Crap._

_“I’m going to assume that’s a yes,” Detective Oishi said as he noted that on his document. The other investigator stood, giving his foster parents a regretful smile._

_“I’m sorry, but we can’t have you guys here anymore. We don’t want to risk him holding anything back because of you two.”_

_The Fujiwaras looked at him with even more worry, making Natsume feel guilty as he squeezed Nyanko Sensei. He should’ve been more prepared, but that name - he couldn’t help it. The memories he once repressed came shooting through him all over again._

_Shigeru nodded as he gently squeezed Touko’s shoulder as they both looked over at him. “Takashi, if they make you uncomfortable and you don’t want to continue, call for us. We’ll put an end to this meeting.”_

_Natsume was actually very grateful for the support as he nodded, watching them go with a lump in his throat. He didn’t want Sensei to hear either, but he needed a safety net to hold onto._

_“We have to record this session as evidence, is that okay?” Akasaka softly asked as Oishi got the recorder set up._

_“Yes,” Natsume agreed, feeling a nervous bead of sweat slide down the side of his face._

_Akasaka sighed as he sat down again, giving Natsume a very soft and reassuring smile. “It’s okay, we’re not going to hurt or judge you. Everything you tell us today can help us save a kid who’s stuck in the same situation you were in. I just wish there had been someone to help you back then too.”_

_He was being sincere, both him and Sensei could tell. The tight grip he had around Nyanko slowly loosened as he took a deep breath. Seeing he was ready, they started._

_“Do you remember Teppei Hojo?” Oishi asked._

_“Yes,” Natsume responded, taking another deep breath as he felt his nerves come back. “He was one of the first people that were forced to take me in once I couldn’t stay at the orphanage anymore.”_

_“How did he act the first day he took you home?”_

_Natsume bite his lip, no longer looking them in the eye. It was hard going back there, but he had someplace to call home now, and a family who loved him very much. He didn’t have to fear this man anymore._

_“He was acting cold and hateful. He kept mumbling about how he wasn’t going to get enough money from my other relatives to cover both my living costs and the time he’ll lose watching over me while we drove to his house. I remember being really depressed, so I was sulking in the back seat, not even noticing we arrived. I remember... being pulled out of the car’s window by the hair… and him screaming in my face saying I didn’t have the right to be sad, not when he was the one forced to give up his way of living for someone the orphanage didn’t even know what to do with. I said I was sorry, but he ignored me and dragged me by the hair into the house and locked me the bathroom. I... spent the whole night there, huddled in the tub.”_

_He remembered now… it was so cold and damp, he spent most of the night crying with his back against the dirty tub. The man was talking on the phone, probably to some other relatives as he kept demanding them to come and collect ‘the little fuck.’_

_“Shit, FUCK!” He’d hear the man curse occasionally, followed by a crash._

_This was the first and only time he was ever hurt by someone so bad he literally ran away. The police found him, and for some reason, just gave him to another relative. Nothing was ever done to Teppei Hojo as far as he was aware._

_Realizing the others were still quiet, he chanced a glance up, only to regret it. They both looked sad and angry, not to mention regretful. They probably felt bad for him, after all they would’ve had to look up his own history file before coming here._

_“Why didn’t you ask for help?” Akasaka asked gently, though the answer didn’t really matter anymore._

_“Back then, I was just grateful to have a place to sleep and food to eat. I was just… used to it-”_

_‘Thought I deserved it,’ he left out, knowing that would’ve made them try to comfort him. He knew now that he didn’t deserve it, so it didn't matter._

_Taking that as an answer, Osihi cleared his throat and moved on. “What were your living conditions like?”_

_“I had a blanket and slept in the laundry room. It was really hot in there, so I usually just used it as a pillow and slept on the dirty laundry. There was a sink in there to handwash clothes, so I’d use the crates and laundry to build stairs so I could drink.”_

_“Does that mean he didn’t let you out to get water?” Oishi asked this time, to which Natsume tensed a bit._

_“N-no… the door typically wasn’t locked, but it was better to stay in there for as long as I could.” He held Nyanko a little tighter again, not even noticing the other wasn’t complaining._

_“Why is that?” Oishi asked, pressing further._

_“I.. uhm…” he swallowed thickly. This was it, this is where the abuse really started. “I’d become a target.”_

_“What would he do to you?”_

_“Different… things, depending on his mood, or if I pretended to see something that scared me. If he was drunk he’d throw the bottles at me while yelling, not even caring that it cut me. Sometimes he’d hurt me by beating me up on my stomach or legs, places others wouldn't see. If I was caught crying or not paying attention, he’d dunk my head under water for a while. And whenever there was a game on he’d make me bring him his beer, then burn out his cigarettes on my back.” His eyes creased, wondering if Teppei Hojo did those things or not. Some of his relatives were pretty bad and blended… but considering it was_ him _, he wouldn’t be surprised in the least._

_“He’d burn the cigarettes out on your back?” Oishi asked, putting the pen down._

_Natsume felt his heart drop as he cautiously nodded, knowing where this was going._

_“Do you mind if we see?”_

_This was to save an innocent child… he could do this. “Do you mind… if I show you at the end? I don’t want to lose my nerve,” he honestly admitted, to which made the other two nod._

_“Yes, understandable.” Oishi agreed. “Does your doctor have records of the burns?”_

_“Yes, but I just told them it happened a long time ago, and that I didn’t remember where the burns were from. I honestly repressed my time with him, so I forgot about it until now.” Back then, it didn’t matter. Why stir trouble when he didn’t need to especially when it could get the Fujiwara’s involved?_

_“Are you saying others did this to you too?”_

_Crap - he didn’t want to go down this rabbit hole. “Sort of, but they were nothing like him.”_

_“I see…” Akasaka trailed off, glancing at Oishi, seeming to drop it for now._

_“Did he feed you?”_

_Ah, that’s right, food. “Sometimes. He taught me how to use the microwave so I could heat food up for him, but if it wasn’t good enough, he’d throw it back at me. When that happened, I knew I wasn’t going to eat for at least a day or two. Sometimes he’d say he simply forgot to feed me when I was so hungry I could barely move. If I asked for food, I’d be punished for being a beggar and locked in the laundry room.”_

_“Did he do some of these things because, as you said earlier, you said you saw things that scared you?” Akasaka asked, making Natsume become stiffer than a board. Of course they’d ask this question. They read his whole file._

_“Yes,” he said, his voice quieter, hoping they’d understand that he didn’t want to talk about it._

_“We have a police report stating you ran away from home, and when officials found you, you had a dog collar around your neck and part of a chain.”_

_Hair fell in front of Natsume’s face, remembering that too well. “Yes.”_

_“Can you tell us why?”_

_He stayed quiet for a moment, trembling ever so slightly. “There’s a police report for it-”_

_“And we think it’s bullshit.” Oishi growled, making Natsume look up in surprise. All he saw was anger in the man’s eyes, meaning he was being honest. “We want to know what happened from your perspective.”_

_What really happened… huh? They were the first people to ask him. The police who took care of his case back then merely blamed him and made his relative a victim before shipping him somewhere else. Of course no one stood up for him or believed him. This was the first time someone actually believed him over the police._

_Of course he’d have to cover the whole truth because it involved a rather nasty youkai that followed his relative home one day. Why, Natsume still didn’t know, but he was there, a persisting shadow with two very yellow eyes, giving off an aura that made the man even more short tempered than usual._

_Things got worse from there, especially when the youkai tried hurting him. The man, who could see he was obviously struggling against something, just cursed him out and hurt him, even going as far as dunking his head in a tub filled with water a few times to make him stop._

_“I don't remember what I did… but I made him really mad. He said he had enough of me and dragged me outside. I guess he used to have a dog because there was an old run down dog house with a metal stake in the ground with a chain around it. He took the chain, attached a dog collar to it, and put it tightly around my own neck. He said if I got too loud or even tried crying for help, he’d cut my tongue off. I didn’t say anything as he went back inside. That was the last time I saw him.”_

_But it wasn’t the last time he saw the youkai._

_“No food or water?”_

_Natsume shook his head. “It rained the next day, but I knew I had to leave.”_

_More like the youkai that had been mocking him from inside finally came out, laughing darkly. ‘I’ll eat up and savor your misery, you insignificant human.’_

_“I tried getting the collar off the night before, but the clasp was too complicated for me to figure out. Instead I used the wet ground to dig the metal stake that held the chain, and ran. I didn’t know the area very well, but I stumbled upon a shrine. That’s where they found me.”_

_He didn’t need to explain that the youkai attacked him while he was digging, and it was the youkai that inadvertently pulled the stake up._

_The two detectives remained silent for a moment as they both looked over the paper in front of Oishi, both nodding as they checked the answers._

_“Is there anything else you can remember that he did to you? Anything you’re holding back?”_

_Natsume shook his head. That’s as much as he remembered for now without risking bleeding into what other relatives did to him._

_“I’m sure there is, but I just can’t remember, I’m sorry.” He sighed, being honest._

_Akasaka shook his head with a kind smile that made him relax a little bit. “You’ve helped more than enough, no need to be sorry. If anything we’re sorry that law enforcement failed you back then.”_

_Natsume merely shrugged. Even if the police had been honest, nothing would’ve changed. Whoever he went to next would’ve acted like they cared and showed false sympathy for a little bit before reverting back to their true selves. It wasn’t anything he hadn’t seen before._

_“May we have a picture of your back now?”_

_Natsume nodded as he stood, gently setting Nyanko Sensei on the table who watched the other two in suspicion. Concern was a funny look on him, and if he hadn’t had to relive such a dark time in his childhood, he would’ve teased him for it._

_The investigators got up as well while Natsume pulled his hoodie off, letting the others see it._

_“They’re faint now, but they’re still there. This will still help,” Akasaka said as he took a photo._

_“Are you finished, Takashi?” Shigeru’s voice came from the door as it opened. Natsume turned a little pale as he avoided his gaze._

_They had asked about those burns before. He told them he didn’t remember where they were from._

_But now they knew - they knew he had lied._

_“We are now,” the detectives reassured, letting him pull his shirt back down._

_Natsume couldn’t look their way - he didn’t want to see the disappointment and shame in their eyes._

_“Thank you for your cooperation,” Oishi said. “In the event they ask you to testify before him, would you be willing? Based off what you’ve told us, you and the kid went through similar things, except he’s his own son. Some of the police are even trying to side with Teppei Hojo, saying the kid’s just crying for attention after his mother’s death.”_

_Natsume took another deep breath as he clenched his fists. “Yes,” he said, looking at them seriously. “I’ll do what I can to help him.” He wasn’t going to let that poor kid suffer anymore._

_“Thank you,” Akasaka said with a relieved smile. “We’ll collect statements about your character from your foster parents, teachers, and doctors in case they try to attack you personally in court. When’s the last time you saw your physician?”_

_Natsume blushed. “Just two weeks ago. I kind of like hiking too much,” he easily lied, making the other two chuckle a bit._

_“That makes things easier for us then. We’ll leave our information on the table,” Oishi said as they both bowed. “As for your statements-” he turned to his foster parents. “If his character is questioned in court, would you be willing to vouch for him?”_

_“Of course,” they both said reassuringly. “They get to hear what they’re missing out on.” Touko winked over at Natsume, making him blush slightly._

Ah, that’s right. He was taken, and someone needed him.

Crying… he could hear a child crying amidst water gently tapping against stone walls.

_‘Help me… someone… anyone...’_

_‘I’m coming,’_ Natsume cried out, clenching his own chest, feeling the warmth from his foster parents surrounding him. _‘Just hold on, I’ll find you…’_


	3. The Disappearance

They found him, they found Natsume-!

_Ring… ring…_

He was at a hospital a few towns over, but Touko didn’t want to say much over the phone. All she said was that he was safe. Did that mean he was hurt?? She said Natori was already there, so did that mean this was the work of a youkai after all?

“Hello-”

“Taki?” He interrupted, his worry getting the best of him. 

“Huh? Tanuma?” Taki asked, surprised at how shaken he sounded.

“They found him - they found Natsume!”

“Really? That’s great news-!”

“He’s at the hospital, Touko said she’d explain once we got there.” 

Taki went quiet, the reality of those words sinking in. If Natsume was okay she would’ve told them so. The fact that she didn’t say anything made them both horribly uneasy. “I’ll meet you at the train station in fifteen minutes. I’ll let Sasada know so she can tell the others.”

They’ve been searching nonstop ever since Tanuma received a call from Touko two nights ago...

It was late, for him at least. The clock read ten at night as Tanuma finally slipped into bed, that lingering feeling of unease knotting and swirling in his stomach. It started when he parted ways with Natsume after school, leading him to believe it had something to do with youkai. Did one follow him home? Or had one followed Natsume and the other just didn’t mention it?

No headaches plagued him, leading him to believe the latter. Somehow he just knew whatever he felt earlier was bad and hoped Ponta met Natsume half way home as he tended to do a lot. 

If only they had cell phones, or at least computers so he’d have a way of asking if he was okay without having to worry the Fujiwaras. 

A knock at his door snapped him out of his thoughts as his father came in. “Sorry to wake you, but Touko’s on the phone about Natsume.”

Instantly he sat up, his heart starting to race in fear. Touko was calling him about Natsume this late at night? The uneasy feeling in his gut grew worse, nearly making him panic.

This couldn’t be good. 

“Thank you,” he said as he got out of bed and hurried to the phone, his heart beating heavily in his ears. 

“Touko?” Tanuma asked with a fearful lump in his throat.

“I’m sorry to bother you so late, but we were wondering if you’ve heard from Takashi. He hasn’t come home yet and your father said he wasn’t there either.”

He wasn’t… home yet? But he turned the others down when they asked him to go fishing because he had to finish some chores, unless… that was a lie?

No, Natsume’s been pretty honest with him lately, especially when it involved youkai. He even came to him when Nyanko Sensei ate the fruit that split him into three different cats. If there was anything youkai related going on, he would’ve said something. 

Of course, he could’ve gotten caught up in some youkai business on his way home though… 

“No, sorry. I last saw him where we usually part ways on our way home from school. Did you try calling Nishimura and Kitamoto?”

“Yes,” she sighed, making Tanuma feel even more nervous. “They said the same thing you did. I know he can be late sometimes, but never this late. We were supposed to make dinner together. He was really excited about it, at least, I thought he was.”

Touko expected him back early? Natsume would’ve found a way to tell her he’d be late by now unless something really bad happened to him. 

“I’ll search a few places we usually hang out just in case,” he reassured. 

“No, you don’t have to do that,” Touko tried, but Tanuma shook his head.

“I’ll be really quick. I’d feel better knowing I checked myself. I’ll call Taki too and ask her if she’s seen or heard from him. Is Nyanko Sensei there?”

“Huh? Nyanko Sensei?” She asked, horribly confused as to why Tanuma wanted to know about their cat. “No, he left right before dinner.”

Tanuma bit his bottom lip nervously. Why did Sensei wait so long before searching for him? What if something happened and he needed help?

“If Nyanko Sensei left, I bet he went to search for Natsume too. I wouldn't worry too much.”

Touko couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle. “You’re right, those two are practically inseparable. I bet Nyankichi already found him. But I’ll keep checking around, just in case. Thank you Tanuma, this really means a lot. Please call me if anything comes up, and be safe.”

“Same to you,” he said before hanging up, trying to steady his breath.

He had to calm down, he was sure Natsume was fine. And yet… what was this deep unsettling pit in his stomach? 

Taking a deep breath, he dialed Taki’s number. When she didn’t answer he dialed it one more time.

“Hello?” He heard Taki answer, seeming hardly awake. 

“Taki, it’s Tanuma. Sorry to wake you.”

“T-Tanuma?” She gasped, confused. “What’s wrong?”

“Touko just called me, she said Natsume isn’t home yet.”

“Eh?” She held her breath, probably facing the same fear he felt now. “He was at school, but I haven’t seen him since!”

“Me either. Touko said Nyanko Sensei was home until a little while ago. There’s a good chance they’re together now, but there’s also a chance he’s still looking for Natsume-”

“So he’s not here either.” Tanuma jumped, smacking himself in the ear with the phone as he turned, seeing Nyanko Sensei cleaning himself off. 

“Ponta??” He looked around, thankful his father wasn’t around. 

“Huh? Is Sensei there??” Taki asked, sadly going unanswered as Tanuma knelt down to him. 

“Touko just called, said she can’t find Natsume.”

“I can’t find the brat either,” Nyanko hissed, looking at the phone. “Is that the Taki girl? She hasn’t seen him either?”

“None of us have. We… were hoping you were with him,” Tanuma admitted, feeling his fear fully returning. 

Sensei let out a long annoyed sigh. “Damn that brat!! I didn’t leave because I patrolled earlier and I didn’t sense any strong youkai nearby. I just assumed he was running around being an idiot!”

“Do you sense anything now, Sensei?” They both heard Taki ask through the phone. 

One of Nyanko’s ears twitched. “No. There seems to be less youkai out than usual.”

“We should search for him then,” Tanuma said as he stood. “He could be injured somewhere.”

“Stick together. There might not be a lot of youkai out, but if you’re alone some will try to take advantage of that.” He wrinkled his nose, as if remembering something unpleasant. “I asked Natsume’s youkai friends to search for him too. Don't yell his name out too much. The less youkai that know about his disappearance the better.”

“Got it. I’ll bring my grandfather’s circle just in case.” Taki said.

They met up at the school’s front gates, wanting to be sure they covered as much ground as possible. No one seemed to be in the school building as all the doors were locked, so they ventured onto the path they usually took home. 

“We should really bug our parents into getting cell phones,” Tanuma mumbled as they pointed their flashlights left, hearing the bushes rattle. For a moment their hearts soared, only to sink as a rabbit ran deeper into the forest. 

“I know it’s expensive, but I agree. If Natsume had a phone, we’d probably know where he was right now,” she mumbled, tightening the grip she had around the flashlight. 

“And if he ran into trouble, he could call or text us,” Tanuma sighed, wishing he had pushed the thought through sooner. They had brought it up to Natsume once, but of course he declined. 

_‘I don’t want them spending more money than they already are on me.’_

Forty to fifty dollars a month was worth it if it spared them panic attacks like now. Natsume could be perfectly fine and no one would know.

“I wonder if he’s with Natori…”

“With who?” Taki asked with a tilt of her head, recognizing the name but couldn’t remember why. Aside from the famous actor, she’s pretty sure Natsume mentioned him once during the Kai incident.

“Oh-” he let out a nervous laugh, realizing she’s never met him before. It was probably better that way considering she loved him as an actor. “He’s another friend of Natsume’s that know about his ability. He doesn’t talk about him much, but…”

“There’s hope, right?” Taki finished for him, giving him an understanding smile. “Do you know how to contact him?”

Tanuma rubbed the back of his head in frustration, realizing he didn’t have Natori’s number. Right, he was also an actor. How would he even find his number? Maybe Touko had it. After all she tried to keep a detailed record on the people Natsume hung out with. “No, but maybe Touko has it.”

“Maybe…” she mumbled, stopping in her tracks. “I wonder… what Touko’s thinking right now.” 

The other couldn’t help but wonder the same thing, stopping in his tracks too. “Probably the same thing any normal parent thinks - that he’s staying at a friend’s house, got lost in the woods, or got hurt and can’t make it home.”

“But she knows he doesn’t like to make them worry,” she brought up, which only made the situation worse.

He didn’t like making the Fujiwara’s worried, so why was he making them worry now?

“Natsume once told me he got home a whole day late due to some youkai and exorcist business. He thought they’d really let him have it.”

Taki couldn’t help but smile again, shining the light between two trees and down a shady looking path. “But they didn’t, huh?”

Tanuma shook his head as he took a step forward towards the path. Sensei told them not to call his name out too much, meaning it was okay to do it a few times. “Natsume?”

They both waited with bated breaths-

To no avail. They kept walking.

“No. By some stroke of luck they didn’t get home until an hour past his usual bedtime, so they assumed he had already gone to sleep.” His dark eyes creased in worry, remembering how guilty Natsume felt that day. “He was so mad at himself, he wouldn’t listen to anything I said. If luck hadn’t saved him he wasn’t sure what he would’ve done to make up for his disappearance.”

A familiar sudden pain coursed through Tanuma’s head, though it was fainter than usual. “Taki-” he said, putting a hand out, signalling for her to stop. 

Someone else was with them, someone they couldn’t see. 

Taki immediately stood still, feeling a nervous bead of sweat forming on the side of her face. She couldn’t sense anything, and none of them could see youkai. What if this one was bad?

Something pulled the copy of her grandfather’s magic circle from under her arm, making her squeak. Tanuma instantly ran over and protectively stood in front of her as the paper unfolded itself on the ground. 

“Sorry for the intrusion,” came a deep voice as a man with a large head and mustache appeared on the paper, his hands folded together in his sleeves. “But you are some of Natsume’s friends, correct?”

“Chobi!” Taki said excitedly, relieved to see a familiar face. Tanuma couldn’t help but look at her, then the youkai, confused. “This is Chobihige. When Natsume helped free me from the curse, Chobihige helped us.”  
Oh right - they talked about him before. He just never pictured him to look like this.

“We don’t have a lot of time,” Chobi interrupted them, making them both go silent. “Kappa said he saw something bad happen to Natsume, but he needs water to continue. Do you have a bottle of it?”

“Yes-” Taki pulled off her backpack and pulled it out, holding it out to him. “We can’t see him, can you give it to him?”

“Certainly. Follow me.” Without warning he disappeared from sight, however the water bottle did not. Taki quickly collected the paper from the ground and followed it. Just a little more ways up the sidewalk, they saw the bottle stop before the lid was slowly unscrewed. 

Kappa - this must be the youkai Natsume often stopped to help. He did it a few times with them, but didn’t say much aside from _‘be more careful,’_ and _‘take care’_ after pouring the whole bottle onto the ground. The water, like now split in different directions, showing it was obviously being obstructed by something they couldn’t see. 

Seeing the cap being screwed back on, she hesitantly put the paper down, knowing the ink on the circle was going to get messed up. Thank gods she practiced drawing it just in case a situation like this occurred.

“Thank you,” a small male yet squeaky voice came through as a rather small green youkai with a bald top and mossy hair appeared on the circle. Taki saw the water dripping against the ink, already making it run.

Quickly she grabbed a stick and started etching it into the ground, listening as she drew. 

“I-I thought I was gonna die!” He squeaked before looking over at where they assumed Chobihige was, not realizing they could see him. “B-but they took him - they took Natsume-” the voice and image instantly faded, making both Taki and Tanuma jump. 

“W-wait, stop, we can’t see or hear you anymore-”

“But we need to know what happened!” Tanuma looked over at Taki who finished the circle, beating her own personal record. “Please walk into the circle, and be careful with the lines.”

“-like this?” They heard the small voice ask as he, along with Chobihige appeared in the circle.

“Yes, please tell us what you saw,” Taki said urgently, unable to help the fact that she was impatient. They all were, even Chobi.

The small youkai jumped as he stared at the other two humans, obviously finding it strange that they could see him. “U-uhm… yeah, they took him,” he repeated. 

“Who?” They all asked, their fear making the atmosphere grim. Their tones made Kappa jump again nervously. 

“H-humans, an adult human, a smaller human, and a youkai.”

Both Taki and Tanuma grew horribly confused and concerned. Humans took Natsume? Why would a human be interested in Natsume? If there was a youkai with them, did that mean they were exorcists?

“Were they exorcists?” Tanuma asked with a nervous gulp. Natsume didn’t really talk about the exorcists in high favor. He even seemed scared of a group of them, but he couldn't remember the name. 

“No, I don’t think so. They didn’t have any power and they couldn’t see me. I even launched myself against one of their legs, but all they did was scream. I made both the humans stop, but they couldn’t figure out why their leg was being squeezed. The youkai with them knocked me off a few seconds later, just long enough for Natsume to hide his bag.”

“His bag?” Taki asked. “Why would he take the time to hide his bag?” Natsume brought his bag with him nearly everywhere he went. Tanuma only recently found out why.

“Where is it?” He asked, hoping it was still there. “I’ll give it to Sensei right away.”

Despite it being a treasure to their friend, he also knew how dangerous it was. It’s the reason Natsume chose to hide it instead of taking the extra few seconds to gain some distance. He knew there was little chance of escaping and chose to protect the youkai over himself.

Tanuma wasn’t sure if he should be proud of Natsume for being a hero or angry since he didn’t value his own life.

Seeing as the two youkai stayed silent, he sighed. “Natsume told me about it, and how precious it is to him. I refuse to let it be taken by some youkai wanting to abuse it, or any human for that matter.”

“You can carry it, but we’ll decide how to keep it safe until Natsume is found,” Chobihige said sternly. “We won’t put Natsume’s friends in danger.”

As much as Tanuma wanted to retaliate, he knew better. If someone learned about Natsume’s disappearance and that he was in possession of the Book of Friends, it would literally be taking candy from a baby. He refused to let such a treasure be stolen under his watch.

“That’s fine by me, but Sensei has to approve of the decision.” After all, he wasn’t sure what youkai could be trusted. 

“That’s fine,” Chobihige agreed, looking to Kappa who pointed into the forest.

“Fourth tree under the pile of weeds.” Before Tanuma could even turn around, Chobi disappeared, the leaves flying in the wind. It wasn’t until now that he noticed the bushes were missing quite a few branches that were broken all over the ground. Glancing a bit into the road, he spotted tire tracks in the dirt along with haphazard footprints.

Strange, they’ve never seen a car go down this road before, nor did they ever see tire tracks from an actual car. It only backed up Kappa's story. 

“Here,” his voice was suddenly back in the circle, making the humans quickly turn back around, going a bit pale. The youkai was back in the circle holding out Natsume’s muddy and slightly ripped book bag to Tanuma.

He hadn’t even been gone for three seconds-! What _was_ this youkai?

“Thanks,” Tanuma said as he cautiously took the bag, draping it around his own chest. 

“Can you tell us what the humans looked like?” Taki asked as she knelt on the ground, looking the Kappa directly in the eyes. The youkai grew a bit uncomfortable at the action, not used to the attention. 

“They smelled the same, except one was older, and one was about your guy’s age.”

“Smelled the same?” Tanuma asked, becoming a bit perplexed. 

“He means they’re related,” Nyanko Sensei’s voice made them all turn, watching the cat form seemingly out of thin air. “What did the older one look like?”

“He had shaggy greasy dark brown hair and sharp hazel eyes. He was wearing a long sleeve black shirt and pants. But the shirt had designs in it, like lines,” the Kappa said, trying his best to recall all the details. “The other one was smaller, wore short dark brown pants and a dark red shirt. His hair was slightly lighter than the others, and even though they had the same colored eyes, the small one looked… different.”

“Different?” Tanuma mumbled, not really sure what it meant.

“Yeah, like… his face looked weird, like when Natsume’s really scared.” The Kappa blinked. “Oh, he must’ve been scared. Human emotions are so confusing.”

Both the humans saw how rigid and still Sensei got, the look on his face crossing between fearful and deep concern. They’ve never seen him show genuine emotion before; it scared them.

“Call Touko,” Sensei said, turning to the other youkai. “This isn’t a youkai threat, those humans are probably trying to hurt Natsume. Tell everyone to widen their search-”

This wasn’t a youkai threat? So the ones behind this really were normal humans? But who would want to hurt Natsume?

“Sensei-”

“Go, call her _now_ ,” he growled, his image becoming hazy. “Tell them where you found the bag and figure out how to give them the human’s descriptions without becoming suspicious.” A giant gust of wind stopped them from asking anymore questions as it even erased the circle.

And just like that, Nyanko Sensei was gone. 

Taki dropped her bag before they started running, using it as a landmark. 

“W-what does this mean?” Taki asked between breathes, her voice shaky with fear.

“I-I don’t know,” Tanuma admitted. “I’ve never seen Sensei like this before.”

If Nyanko Sensei wanted them to tell Touko, that meant the police would get involved. Sensei knew that, and obviously wanted it. Getting the authorities involved was always Natsume’s worst nightmare, so if Sensei thought it was necessary, things were way worse than they imagined. 

“Touko, it’s Tanuma and Taki,” Tanuma started on the phone, trying to catch his breath. “We found Natsume’s bag in the forest completely dirty and torn. We also noticed tire tracks, but we’ve never seen a car come down this road.”

Her choked cry made them want to tear up. They never thought they’d ever hear her cry, and were heart broken now that they did. 

They told her where to find them and immediately called the police. They told them as much as they could over the phone, and watched them arrive shortly after. 

They pointed to the tire tracks, along with where they found the bag. They agreed that there seemed to have been some kind of struggle and asked the see the bag. Tanuma handed it over, more than relieved he took the Book of Friends out before they got there and secured it under his shirt. They took it away as evidence just as Shigeru and Touko showed up, their faces filled with absolute fear and horror. 

“Do any of you know someone who wanted to hurt him?” The chief of police asked, to which all of them shook their heads. 

“He’s a sweet and kind boy. Sure he plays rough and hurts himself a lot, but he’s never done anything to make someone hate him-” Touko stopped, her eyes filling to the brim in absolute terror. “Sh-Shigeru-”

The same terror filled his eyes too. “Detectives... came the other day to question Takashi about an old relative who was being convicted of child abuse. They asked if he’d testify… against him...”

\----

“Natori?” Tanuma blinked, surprised to see him outside Natsume’s room. It only made him more fearful. 

The exorcist’s face scrunched in suspicion, but only for a moment. “Oh, Tanuma. It’s been a while. How are you?”

“Worried,” the high schooler admitted, looking past Natori to the window in hopes of at least catching a glimpse of Natsume. The angle was bad though, he couldn’t see past the Fujiwaras. 

“Understandable,” the exorcist sighed, turning his attention to the other. “You must be Taki. I don’t believe we’ve met.”

“I don’t believe so,” she mumbled, though couldn’t help the way she tilted her head. Strange, this Natori looked just like the actor. In fact she was almost positive he was! There was no mistaking that voice and appearance. But if this was _the_ Shuuichi Natori, how did Natsume know him? “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Natori-” Tanuma cut in, catching the exorcist’s eyes before looking to the room. “How is he?”

There was no easy way to tell them the truth, so he decided to cut to the chase. “He’s comatose.”

All the color drained from their faces as they both stopped breathing. Taki’s legs started shaking, feeling like she’d collapse. Natori took a step forward, but she merely motioned with her hands that she was fine.

“How?” She asked, pulling her hands to her chest, trying to calm herself down. 

“He’s in really rough shape,” he started, not really sure how to reveal what happened. Shigeru was planning on telling them, however this was the least he could do to help the Fujiwaras. Maybe the band aid method was best. “I found him in the woods while at a work party, horribly beat, and left to die.”

Taki didn't resist when Natori caught her this time, her face as white as a ghost and legs so weak she could barely stand anymore. Tanuma was so caught up in the news he didn’t even react until after, just staring at them with trembling eyes. 

Someone beat and left Natsume to die? Had Touko been right? Did Natsume’s relative do this to him?

“Here, how about you take a seat,” Natori gently told Taki as both he and Tanuma helped her to the seat next to the window. 

“Did they catch them?” Tanuma asked, his voice unusually low as his hands trembled at his sides.

Natori glanced up at him from where he knelt down in front of Taki, one of his lenses glaring over. “No.”

Tanuma let out a stressed breath of air as he went to the window, looking through it as best as he could. It was hard to see… but Natsume was indeed hooked up to a bunch of machines-

“Were there any youkai involved?” He asked, wanting something other than a human to blame. The exorcist looked surprised and even paled slightly.

“I know,” Taki said shakingly, knowing Natori probably wasn’t aware of what kind of friendship they shared with Natsume. “We know. He saved my life - our lives multiple times, and help him when we can.”

That made sense. He was glad Natsume was able to share his burden with others who were normal - well, almost normal. 

“Yes, but I’m not sure to what degree,” he admitted as he stood, looking back into Natsume’s room. “Hiiragi, one of my shiki, informed me she senses two curses on him. I haven’t been able to investigate myself, but even when I’m able to, I won’t be able to tell if they’re from youkai that was involved or curses placed on him while he was in the forest. The curses are probably what’s keeping him comatose,” the exorcist admitted, clenching his fists. “But I can’t just walk in and demand the Fujiwaras to leave. This is the first time they’ve been able to be with him since he was found, and I can't risk telling them about his other life.”

The other two went silent, agreeing with him. They weren’t sure how to proceed in this situation either. Surely waiting a little bit longer wouldn’t hurt too much, right?

A strong presence made Tanuma hold his head and snap Natori out of his thoughts. The entity nearly engulfed the whole hospital in an instant, meaning there was a strong youkai hovering above them. Could that Nyanko Sensei? No, this power affected the kid just a second ago. This was a foreign power, one he’s never sensed before. 

This was bad. What if it was a youkai after the Book of Friends? Wait, what happened to the Book of Friends?!

“Natori, is there something here?” Tanuma asked, making the exorcist turn to him and open his mouth, only to panic. 

Behind the window surrounding the Fujiwaras was an older female youkai with purple hair tied back wearing a darker purple kimono. She was speaking to Hiiragi, who seemed to untense the more she spoke. 

Did that mean she was a friend? What about the presence around the hospital??

“Tch, you guys didn’t even tell me you found him,” Nyanko Sensei’s voice came from behind them, making Natori grit his teeth.

He was finally here, the failure of a guardian himself. 

“We didn’t know where you went,” Tanuma said, seeing Taki not reacting as she usually did around him. Then again, how could she with everything going on?

“Sorry, Sensei,” she sighed, hugging herself for comfort. “We knew you’d find us eventually.”

“Eventually?” Natori spat, glowering darkly at the youkai who merely glared back. “Where the hell were you? Why weren’t you there to protect him?!”

“The brat was on his way home - there were hardly any youkai out! How was I supposed to know humans would take him?! The only one shady enough to do that was the Matoba brat and he hasn’t been around in months!”

Despite that story sounding horrifying, Natori was too heated to let this go. “You’re supposed to _BE_ there for him, you’re his bodyguard, right!? That means you’re supposed to be with him wherever he goes, protecting him at all times!”

“I’m no slave or shiki!” Nyanko spat, standing on his hind legs. “I do a good job protecting him, he just doesn’t listen and gets himself in trouble!”

Natori quickly pulled some paper dolls out from his pocket, glaring at him darkly. “Give me one good reason not to exorcise you right now.”

“Wait-!” Taki cried, standing between them, her legs still shaky. “Look, I know Sensei isn’t always there but he steps in and helps when it counts. He’s never let us down-“

“You don’t have a _clue_ what's almost killed Natsume in the past! I’ve seen it, I’ve seen how he’s almost failed him _and_ Tanuma-“

“But Natsume forgives him each time,” Tanuma interrupted, standing in front of Nyanko too, protecting him. “Because Sensei saves him when no one else can.”

Natori clicked his tongue and tightened his grip on the paper dolls. They were just normal kids, there was no way they’d understand-!

“Natsume chose this fate for himself,” a woman's voice came from behind, making him spin around. The purple haired women and Hiiragi stood behind him, the strange youkai blowing smoke in his face. 

“He could’ve called out to anyone at anytime, any of us, and we would’ve been there within seconds. But he didn’t - he never does. He always chooses to try helping himself rather than involving us youkai who want nothing more than to help him. We constantly tell him how useless Madara is and offer to become his new bodyguard, but he turns us down each time.” She inhaled her pipe, once more breathing it out in his face. “They have a bond none of us can replicate or even come close to understanding. Exorcising the pig would only make Natsume mad.”

As much as he didn’t want to listen to the words of a strange youkai, he knew she was right. 

“Who are you?” Natori asked, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. Hiiragi didn’t seem to be on edge, which meant she wasn’t dangerous - for now. 

“I’m one of Natsume’s friends, and I happen to be very familiar with curses.”

Natori’s eyes creased as he glanced over at window, only to nearly stumble backwards. There were _several_ youkai in the room now, one with a large head with a mustache, two small ones that wore the same clothes, a kappa, and a large horse-like face that peered through the window.

“Who invited them?” Nyanko said with an annoyed tone, but when Natori glanced over at him, he saw a sense of relief in his eyes. “He’s my charge - this isn’t fair!”

“Master-” his other two shiki frantically appeared. “There’s too many of them!”

“They’re all Natsume’s friends,” Nyanko quickly grumbled, knowing Natori was probably having a panic attack. “Even the one looking through the window.”

“Wh-what?” The exorcist stammered. These were all Natsume’s friends? Such powerful youkai-!

“As I said,” Hinoe picked up, seeming amused by the exorcist’s reaction. “He could’ve called upon any of us, even to the ones that aren’t here, but he didn’t.”

Point taken. Despite a human being the cause of his condition, surely a youkai as powerful as the ones now present could’ve easily helped him. So why didn’t he call for help?

Unless… he couldn’t call for help, and by the time he could, no one heard him. The other might hate asking, but even he knew when to stop being stubborn. He did find him with a gag on his mouth. 

“You were talking about curses-”

The door to the room suddenly opened, making all the humans quickly turn their attention to Shigeru. “Sorry, didn’t know you two arrived,” he honestly admitted.

“I filled them in,” Natori reassured, making Natsume’s foster father sigh in relief, giving him a grateful smile. 

“Thank you. There’s not a lot of room, but please, come in,” he said as he started backing up into the room again. “Maybe if he hears all of us, he’ll come back to us soon.”

Collectively they all nodded, following Shigeru into the room except for Natori. “Sorry, I forgot to let my producer know I won’t be at work. I’ll be in in just a moment.” As much as he wanted to go in and finally investigate, he needed to talk to the other youkai and hear her assessment. 

“One of them seems like a powerful sleeping curse. It prevents even sound and pain from waking the victim up, which explains the coma. Some youkai use it as a mercy kill for mortals.”

Okay, that one didn’t sound _too_ horrible. “What about the other?”

Hinoe took a long breath of her pipe, blowing it out against the window as she broke eye contact. “The other curse is overwhelming the other, making it almost impossible to decipher,” she tisked, obviously annoyed. “Whatever it is, it feels negative. We should lift it as soon as possible.”

Natori agreed, but was honestly a little nervous. Natsume was physically very frail and weak right now, he didn’t even want to imagine how he was doing mentally. Performing an exorcism with someone in such a state could prove fatal.

“Be honest,” Natori said as he clenched his fists, feeling useless. “Do you think Natsume will survive the exorcism?”

The women glanced over at him in disgust. “I hate humans, and I hate men even more.” She inhaled some more of her pipe, her eyes once more peering into the window and settling upon the unconscious teen. “But Natsume’s special - my only exception. For him, I’ll work with you during the exorcism and recite an incantation that should protect him. However…” her eyes creased in deep thought, sensing a strange energy emitting from Natsume. “Those curses are powerful, which means a powerful youkai or possibly even a minor deity is responsible.” 

Natori went pale at the news. Why would a minor deity cast a curse on Natsume? What did he do to them to deserve such a punishment?

_“Some youkai use it as a mercy kill for mortals.”_

Maybe Natsume befriended a deity somewhere along the way, and it decided to show him mercy. That definitely sounded more like Natsume, and Natori felt a little better knowing a youkai took pity on him for what a human did. 

His brow creased in worry, somehow knowing they were both thinking the same thing: What state of mind did this experience put Natsume in? He’s always been honest with his feelings, but what if this made him want to shut everyone out again? What if he started shutting _himself_ out?

 _‘I can’t choose between humans and youkai! You’re both very important to me!’_ He recalled Natsume saying to him during the Kai incident, revealing that both humans and youkai were equally important to him. But what would he say now that a _human_ wronged him in such an irreversible way? Would he chose to abandon the human world like his grandmother did out of fear for his own safety and for the safety of his loved ones?

“Natsume’s strong,” the youkai breached his thoughts as she finally put the pipe away, acting as if she had heard his thoughts. “He might be hesitant and scared at first, but he’ll pull through. After all, Natsume’s never been one to say no to someone who asks for help.”

Natori couldn’t help but smile a bit, knowing she was right. Natsume was stubborn and stayed true to his beliefs. They might have a harder time forcing him to take a breather and focus on his own health than anything else - after the initial shock of course. 

“Okay, let’s bring him back to us,” Natori smiled, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. “We just have to figure out how to get the Fujiwaras out of the room long enough to perform the exorcism.”

“We’ll just put them to sleep,” she said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “I’m sure they won’t mind once they see Natsume awake.”

\----

It’s dark, so dark… it feels as if he’s drowning in something that feels like thick gelatin as it oozes down his throat and even in his ears. 

_‘Alone…’_ a voice quietly whispers, making him try to open his eyes.

 _‘Ahh… I am alone, aren’t I?’_ But he wasn’t always. Something pulled him from his peaceful life and dropped him back into hell.

_‘Agony… misery…’_

What happened? It’s so hard to remember, everything feels so heavy and dark.

_‘Just sleep, it’s safer to sleep and forget about everything.’_

Safer? Maybe. But… he was doing something, something important, and he has people who are searching for him. He heard them talking earlier!

As much as it hurts, and as hard as it is, he slowly forces his eyes open, seeing images flash before him:

“Let me go-!” Natsume wailed as he pulled his arm free from the man’s tight grip, hearing nails tear into the strap of his book bag, but luckily miss grasping it. His legs carried him faster than the other could register his movements as he took off down a random path, part of him hoping it was one created by a youkai for once. If it was, it meant there was a chance to lose them!

The younger male around his age let out a screech, making Natsume’s stomach flip. Even if they were attacking him, he couldn’t let them fall prey to youkai.

Chancing a glance back, he saw the younger one desperately shaking his left leg where something _green_ seemed to be attached-

“Kappa?” Natsume gasped, seeing his friend clinging to the human’s leg for dear life.

“Run - go, I’ll distract them!” He yelped, holding on even tighter.

The older man stopped and cursed under his breath, running back over to the other. “The hell’s wrong with you?!”

“M-my leg - i-it feels weird!!”

They couldn’t see the youkai - thank goodness. Taking a deep breath he focused on running away again, making a mental note to thank Kappa later. 

However, he didn’t even take four more steps when something _dark_ emerged from behind him, something _powerful_. Chills ran down his spine as he nearly froze in place.

He didn’t have much time, he could feel it’s gaze searing into his back as Kappa let out a pained cry.

There was no time. He could either turn and try to throw a punch, or he could hide the Book of Friends.

He didn’t even have to think about it. He pulled the book bag off him and tossed it into a hollow in the tree next to him _just_ as he felt the negative energy rush up behind him. 

Pain… he was in so much _pain…_

Ahh… that’s right, he missed his chance to call for help when he tossed the Book of Friends into the tree. In the moment, his top priority wasn’t his own life, it was the hundreds of other youkai whose names were still in the book. He allowed panic and fear overrule common sense, and yet… even though he was in hell, he didn’t regret his decision.

 _‘How could you_ **not** _regret your decision?’_ A familiar rough and grumbled voice hissed. _‘Your decision brought upon your own torture!’_

Natsume couldn’t help but gasp as he felt a fist collide with the side of his face as another slammed into his side just below the ribs, swallowing the cry of pain that involuntarily tried to leak out. His wrists felt like they were slowly being sawed off from the ropes that held him up while his shoulders were screeching in agonizing pain. 

Not this - not again-!! Natsume felt himself trembling in fear as he felt the blows continue, crying out in agony despite the memory of him only letting out grunts and groans as he tried being strong. 

_‘How can you be happy about this?’_

A punch slammed into his lower spine, allowing him to let out a choked cry as sharp agonizing needles spread throughout his body. The attacker didn’t give him a moment of reprieve as another punch landed just below his right shoulder, reopening small burns that had finally scabbed over.

How _could_ he be happy about this, his own torture? 

“You gotta make sure to hurt him where the pain will linger in case he tries to fight back or escape!” He heard the man chuckle, that voice literally making Natsume’s eyes widen in terror. “Hand me that knife.”

It was hard to breath as he felt a dark heavy weight press against him despite the gelatin substance, as if the darkness was trying to swallow him whole.

_‘No one came to rescue you, no one cared enough to even make an effort to find you because of who and what you are.’_

_‘Liar-’_

_‘Creepy-’_

_‘Monster-’_

_‘Are you happy that this happened because it opened your eyes to their true nature?’_

A sharp gasp left Natsume as he swung his head back, feeling the blade dig into his upper inner thigh. “Make sure even walking becomes so agonizing that it takes them longer to run away.”

 _‘N-no,’_ he mumbled out, finding his mind being filled with static. _‘I’m happy… because when I opened my eyes… I saw people who’s cries had always fallen on deaf ears.’_

He numbly looked over to see a trembling scrawny teen around his age with light brown hair and a single tear trailing down his cheek. His hazel eyes were focused on the brute who slashed against his inner thighs again. Natsume bit his bottom lip to prevent the small yelp that tried to leave his lips, but didn't dare take his eyes off the other.

“Now,” the man said as he held the bloody blade out to the teen. “You do it.” The teen’s face filled with absolute horror as his hazel eyes met his own.

_‘I’m happy, because I was there to hear their cries and learn about their pain; I’m happy because I can still help them.’_

_‘You can’t help them,’_ the voice hissed. _‘You can’t even help yourself!’_ The darkness pushed against him harder, making him feel like he was being smothered alive. Horrific images of his captivity came flashing back, along with the pain.

Too much - it was almost too much to handle!

“Y-you’re wrong,” he managed out, forcing images of the teen’s crying face as the older man handed the knife to him, along with Toshiki who cried out when he was punched in the stomach, his black hair hiding his bruised face and tears. “They’re counting on me… I won’t fail!”

A warm light burst from his chest, the gelatin weight surrounding him instantly lifting. Natsume desperately gasped for breath as he felt his eyelids grow heavy.

_‘Please… promise me, grandson of Reiko-’_

Ahh… yes, he even saw the youkai’s pleading rich blue eyes tear up as he shakingly brought a gentle hand to his bruised cheek. It was the same hand that sorrowfully held him down until the man could catch him earlier. _‘Help them, and stop me.’_

 _‘I will,’_ he promised as he felt himself slowly fall asleep, no longer plagued by the darker voice. _‘I'll help them, by helping you...’_


	4. Exorcism

Taki’s body shook against Tanuma, making him tighten the hold he had around her as he involuntarily let out a soft choked sob. They were comforting each other, just as Touko and Shigeru were as they saw silent tears stream down Natsume’s still, pale and swollen cheeks. They called the doctor in moments ago to check him over, but he saw no change - he was still unresponsive. Natsume was probably mad at himself for making them all cry, yet no matter how hard they tried, they couldn’t put a strong front on - not this time.

“I’m sorry, Natsume,” Tanuma sniffled, feeling Taki tighten her hold around his chest in an attempt to comfort him too. “I’m sorry we weren’t there for you.”

Both him and Taki felt like they could’ve done more to prevent this; after all, this was a human threat, not youkai. If they had just walked with him a little longer they could’ve helped fight them off or even convinced him to go fishing instead. Of course none of that mattered now, yet the guilt remained.

Nyanko Sensei sighed from where he was perched on the window seal, seeming to be quietly talking to the others they couldn’t see, but Tanuma could sense them. Ponta looked tense and uneasy, his eyes not leaving Natsume’s body for even a second. They were probably talking about the curses Natori mentioned earlier, but with that intense gaze Tanuma really hoped they weren’t. 

The door to the room opened with a little bit of force, making everyone quickly turn, ready to protect Natsume at a moment’s notice. When they saw it was just Natori they sighed, turning their attention back to their unresponsive loved one. Tanuma didn’t though, there was a determination burning in those dark red eyes and a worry he could practically sense.

“Natori-” he stopped as both Touko and Shigeru fell against each other, making him gasp in worry as he pulled away from Taki. The exorcist was at their side instantly, making sure they were securely leaning against each other. 

“Don’t worry, they’re just asleep. Can you and Taki push their chairs together and move them back a bit?” He mindlessly ordered more than asked as he pulled some paper dolls from his pocket, looking them over.

“What are you doing?” Tanuma asked as they started doing what they were told, being extra careful. 

“We’re going to perform an exorcism to break the curses,” he said as a magic circle started forming around the bed, seemingly out of nowhere. 

“Once you break them, he’ll wake up, right?” Taki asked as she pulled her hands to her chest,

“Possibly,” Natori responded as he ripped up a few papers and scattered them in the circle. “We won’t know until we get rid of them.”

Possibly? So they didn’t know for sure? Tanuma and Taki looked to Nyanko Sensei, seeing the youkai strangely calm about all this. “Sensei-”

“He’s telling the truth,” the youkai said as his black eyes narrowed in on the exorcist. “One of the curses is degrading his health. The doctors probably won’t notice until it’s done a lot of damage and probably blame it on some autoimmune disease.”

“What can we do?” Tanuma asked as he took a determined step forward, growing more pale at the news. “I want to help.”

Natori looked up from his preparations and threw a pad of paper at them. “Rip that up and scatter it around him.”

“You sure this’ll work?” Nyanko asked in suspicion, recalling the way he tried to break Hiiragi from her curse. 

“It’s the only way I know of without exorcising the youkai,” he said as he stared at Natsume for a moment. “Hinoe knows a counter spell and will cast it in order to protect Natsume.”

“It’ll either break the curse or do nothing. If all else fails, we’ll just have to hunt down the one who did this,” Hinoe regrettably said, finishing the circle. “Are you ready?”

Natori nodded. “Go stand next to the Fujiwaras,” he ordered the two children who simply obeyed, looking at each other nervously. 

In sync Natori and Hinoe clapped their hands together, each starting their own incantation. 

Something didn’t feel right, Tanuma realized as a sharp pain shot through his head, feeling the energy in the room sky rocket. Nyanko Sensei seemed to notice as well as he hopped over to Natori and pressed a paw to his leg, lending him some of his power. 

The wind in the room started picking up more and more, the light from the magic circle seeming to wane. Tanuma felt his eyes nearly roll into the back of his head as he fell to his knees, nearly falling over.

“Tanuma!” Taki quietly cried as she knelt down, letting him use her as support. 

A deep rumble caught their ears, a rumble that sounded like a growl masked by thunder. The room grew cold, the wind feeling sharp against their skin. Fear made the hair on the back of their necks rise as they watched what looked like fog seep from Natsume and settle across the room like a poisonous gas.

This wasn’t a curse, this was something else - something evil. But why didn’t they sense it before?

“Keep going!” Hinoe desperately gasped, feeling Natori falter in his shock. The exorcist tremblingly closed his eyes, realizing how _wrong_ and ill prepared they were.

There were two curses _and_ a youkai possessing Natsume; a corrupted youkai that was powerful enough to give off a poison by merely breathing. 

“Why even bother trying?” A deep rumbling voice chuckled. Natori and Hinoe blaunched as they watched Natsume’s lips move, that frown turning into a dark wicked smirk. Very slowly Natsume’s heavily damaged body sat up, the laughter dark and chilling everyone to their bones. 

“N-Natsume,” Natori trembled, stopping his chants in utter shock. This was a _very_ powerful youkai whose evil presence nearly overwhelmed him into unconsciousness. Horrible gruesome images flashed behind his eyes, of people being tortured and slaughtered in its name, most of them _children_.

_‘Stop- it hurts-!’_

_‘Mom, dad-_  
  
‘Help - someone- anyone!!’ Natori felt bile rise in his throat, but forced it down.

“He’s my prey you twat!” Nyanko Sensei hissed, though there was a hint of nervousness in his voice. “Don’t make me force you out!!”

“Like you could,” it mocked, those eyes fluttering open. Natsume’s usual warm golden eyes were completely covered in black goo that seeped down his cheeks, slowly turning red and running like blood. Natori felt his heart stop in his chest realizing that _thing_ was starting directly at _him_.

That smirk widened, the same black ooze starting seeping from the sides of his lips. 

_“_ A human’s challenging me? How cute, you’re so pathetically _weak_ , like an annoying gnat that hasn’t realized it’s going to die today. You’re _nothing_ compared to _this_ body,” the voice said as it ran his wrapped fingers over Natsume’s chest, sighing in ecstasy. “So… powerful, so angsty, so miserable!” It flung Natsume’s head back as it shivered in delight, those sickening eyes half lidded in pleasure. “So much sorrow, yet so much light-! What a fine specimen!!” Those fingers danced along Natsume’s pale bruised neck, snapping the three out of their stupor. 

It was trying to sink it’s nails into his neck-

It was trying to hurt Natsume-!!

Something splashed against Natsume’s face, making the voice screech as steam rose from the skin.

“Natsume is my Master, I won’t allow you to hurt him,” Misuzu glowered darkly from the window.

Natori quickly pulled out a charm, intune with Hinoe’s movements as they both threw talismans against Natsume’s chest. The horrible screech stopped instantly as Natsume’s limp body fell back against the bed.

The magic circle disappeared underneath them as the lights slowly flickered to their normal brightness, revealing all the scraps of paper that used to be white now black all over the room. 

Silence, everyone was absolutely silent. Even Tanuma who lay half conscious against the chair Touko and Shigeru were sleeping on was completely silent.

“What. The hell. Was that,” Nyanko finally voiced, looking to Hinoe and Misuzu for answers. The two youkai both shook their heads, the female seeming quite exhausted and negatively affected by the presence. So was he, but he wasn’t going to let it show. 

“More importantly, how is that _thing_ completely masking its presence now?” Natori asked as he finally let himself fall to his bottom, needing to rest. “It’s incredibly powerful and obviously malicious. Yet I can’t even sense a _trace_ of it.”

No one had an answer, of course they didn’t. This was a youkai unlike any other they’ve encountered before.

“I sensed… children,” Hinoe mumbled, her eyebrows knitting together worriedly. 

“I saw children,” the exorcist spoke up, not wanting to recall those visions. “I think… children were sacrificed in this youkai’s name.” Wearily he looked over at Natsume’s friends, seeing Tanuma forcing himself to stay conscious while the girl seemed both out of breath and half conscious as well.

They were in danger. All the children in this hospital were in danger if this thing managed to get loose. 

“Those seals should hold it for a while,” Natori sighed, running a shaky hand through his hair.

“My spit weakened it as well,” Misuzu said from outside. “It’ll take a while for it to regain enough power to break them.” Nyanko Sensei looked back to Natsume, his ears flickering curiously. Without giving any warning he morphed into his true form, gently surrounding Natsume’s bed protectively. 

“His body’s really weak, I’ll see if my energy can help him stay stable.”

“Won’t that give that thing energy too?” Natori asked, to which Hinoe shook her head. 

“If that were the case, the youkai would’ve woken up a long time ago since Madara’s been lending him some of his energy since he got here.”

“The exorcism woke it up.” Natori almost jumped at the new voice as he whipped his head around, seeing the youkai with the big head and mustache back. “One of us can try to force it out of him, but we risk severely damaging his mind.” 

The exorcist took a deep breath, trying to clear his mind of all thoughts. If he kept panicking he’d never figure out a solution. He needed to stay calm.

“Do you know any other exorcists?” Hinoe asked with a hint of annoyance in her voice. “As much as I hate to rely on humans, they’re the best chance we have.”

“Of course I do,” Natori said, trying to figure out who would be best suited for the job. They needed someone powerful to help compensate for his lack of power. “I’ll make a few calls.” The other tricky part was finding someone who was able to do an emergency call. “We shouldn’t let the Fujiwaras or the kids stay,” Natori said as he slowly forced himself up, walking over to Natsume’s friends. “Are you two okay?”

“Yeah,” Taki said between breathes, glancing over at Tanuma who opened his eyes a little more.

“I will be,” he groaned, weakly holding his head. “Natsume… is he-”

“He’ll be fine, we’ll make sure of that,” he swore, offering a hand. “You two should rest. That thing gave off a nasty poison. You’ll feel better with some sleep.”

Tanuma hesitantly took the hand, unsure if he could even stand. The powerful presence gave him a pretty bad fever and splitting headache, something he was sadly used to. 

With Natori’s help, he was able to get up on wobbly legs. Taki quickly stood and wrapped one of his arms over her shoulders. “Where should we go?” They couldn’t afford the hospital staff to get involved, they’d admit Tanuma without a second thought.

“I’ll take care of that,” Misuzu said, making eye contact with Chobihige. “Youkai as powerful as us can manipulate memories and perception. We’ll make them think Natsume’s in another room until we’re able to save him.”

“Wh-what?” Both Tanuma and Taki gasped while Natori grew a little nervous, not really sure how they would be able to keep the ruse up. 

It just meant he’d have to work fast. “You’ll see,” Natori merely waved as he opened the door for them, seeing the police officer outside had been put to sleep as well. Not like they had been helpful with how late they were anyway.

The two hesitated as they looked at each other, not really sure if they wanted to leave Natsume alone or not. They felt so useless, a feeling even Natori shared. 

“Go ahead, they’ll work their magic. You’ll feel like the new room had always been Natsume’s.”

Once the kids were out, Natori closed the door, looking to the still slumbering Fujiwaras. “Is he… suffering?” 

Hinoe sighed along with Nyanko Sensei as they both shrugged. “Don’t think about that, not now. We need to focus on helping him. While you look for another exorcist, we’ll recruit more youkai to help us look for the one responsible for this.”

Natori raised a confused eyebrow. “What if the one possessing him is the one responsible?”

“It isn't,” Nyanko said. “It's too interested in Natsume unless it would’ve just eaten him before you found him.”

That made sense, as much as he hated it. It was probably trying to find a way to break the curses itself in order to keep Natsume for itself. “Hiiragi, Urihime, Sasago,” he said, all his shiki immediately appearing. “Take the Fujiwaras to the new room. I’ll be back.”

\----

Natsume let out a choked gasp of air as bony fingers tightly squeezed his neck, his own hands desperately reaching for the wrists of his attacker. Fiery pain shot through his palms as he forced his hands back, finding the entity’s skin as hot as metal that was just pulled from an oven. 

_‘Misery… feed me your misery…!’_ A voice whispered, it’s breath making his nostrils nearly bleed when he inhaled. 

_‘Poison!’_ His mind urgently supplied, making him grit his teeth as heat started forming in the hands that were wrapped around his neck. This was bad, he had to get this thing off him before those hands boiled his skin and he passed out from the poison!

Summoning what little strength he had, he opened his eyes and threw a punch at the pitch black creature with yellow eyes, somehow hitting it right in its face. The youkai’s hold around him tore away as it tumbled off him. Taking desperate gasps of air, he clumsily rolled onto his side, his body hitting a small metal gate.

 _‘Huh?’_ He looked down, seeing he was laying in a hospital bed of some sorts. As confused as he was, he tumbled over the gate and onto the floor, smacking his head on the cold hard tile. 

“You can’t escape… you’re mine - _mine_!!” The voice growled as the shadow stood up, making Natsume scramble to his feet. Seeing only one door he crashed into it, finding himself in a dark hallway filled with other doors. It was so dark, making it nearly impossible to see where he should go. If this was a hospital it must’ve lost power. However that wouldn’t explain some of the dim lights that stayed on as they flickered. 

He didn't have time to focus on the specifics for now. He needed a place to hide until he could come up with a plan. 

Taking a deep breath he took off down the hallway, his eyes desperately looking for something that could help him. He could try hiding in one of the other rooms, but what if that thing found him and hurt the other person stationed in the room? He’d never forgive himself. 

“You can’t hide from me, Natsume,” the youkai’s voice echoed down the hall, sending chills down his spine. “I’m already inside you. You’re just postponing the inevitable.”

He was already inside? - No, Natsume shook those words from his head as he focused on running. He couldn’t let the other get inside his head, if he did, it was all over. 

“There’s nowhere for you to go,” it echoed this time. “Did you forget what they did to you?”

What... they did to him? Natsume’s eyes widened as he felt reality crash into him all at once, the overwhelming pain literally crumpling him. He put his arms out in front of him to break his fall, but as soon as pressure was applied he let out a horrific cry as his wrists felt like they snapped off, his face slamming into the tile. 

His head spun as his ears gave off a horrific low ring, completely disorienting him. 

So this is why he was in a hospital… if he was here, that meant someone found him!

“S-Sensei!” He called out, hearing his voice echo down the halls, garnering no response. The only thing he could hear was the dragging footsteps of the youkai somewhere behind him as it slowly made its way towards him. 

“Did you really think they’d come for you?” The youkai chuckled. “That cat of yours took the Book of Friends and left. It realized how _weak_ you are, how unnecessary your existence is.”

Natsume growled, not believing the voice for a second. Even though they’d never admit it, they deeply cared about each other. In a strange way, Natsume saw him as a loving supportive Uncle, or maybe even a young grandfather. Honestly those examples didn't fully cover their relationship, but he didn’t care. They didn’t need to label their relationship because it would always be there. 

“Sensei!!” He called again as he forced his arms in front of him, feeling them shaking. 

He could do this, all he had to do was stay away from that thing because no matter what it said, he could feel Nyanko Sensei and all the others around him. 

Taking a deep sharp breath, he pushed himself up from the ground, biting back the horrific cries of pain as his wrists, thighs, ribs - _everything_ begged him to just rest. 

When he finally got to his feet his ankles gave out, making him stumble and slam into one of the walls, feeling as if nearly every bone became disjointed. Everything became fuzzy again, black dots beckoning him into unconsciousness.

But he could hear it, the soft ominous footsteps getting even closer than before.

Taking another deep shaky breath, he pushed himself along the wall, going as fast as he could. His thighs brushed up against one another, blood slowly seeping down his legs as he reopened the scabs. Natsume felt his lips quiver, trying his best not to express the pain. The further he went however, the harder it became. His legs became so shaky he had to lean forward more and more as he felt cold - so, so cold. The pain was starting to subside as he slowed, the hall swaying as if he were in a boat. The world slipped away for a moment, his eyes rolling into the back of his head as he collapsed on his knees. 

Cold… he was so cold, but he had to keep going. Unlike last time though, nothing responded to his commands. 

Cursing under his breath, he chanced a glance down, only to grow pale. The hospital robe he was wearing was literally soaked in blood as the area around him was becoming a puddle of red. He hadn’t realized it before, but the fall from the hospital bed probably reopened the deep wound on his chest. 

His ears started ringing again, the static following shortly after.

“Sen...sei,” he whispered, finding the static sounding slightly different than before. The more he listened, the more it sounded like the ocean as water slowly pooled on a sandy shore before receding. 

_‘I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…’_ someone faraway sobbed. _‘I can’t end it, not yet…’_

Warmth slowly seeped into his cold body as he finally let his eyes close, the sensation reminding him of home.

_‘Thank you, Sensei…’_

\----

“That’s not good enough!” Natori growled as he punched the wall of a building a little ways from the hospital, his whole body shaking. 

“S-sorry Natori, I can’t just leave, not when I’m so deep in this case,” Aimiya sorrowfully said, truthfully wishing he could help. 

“But Natsume’s a _child_ -”

“And your friend, I get it,” the other man sighed. “Look, I’ll talk to my client and see what I can do.” 

Natori didn’t even say goodbye as he hung up, rubbing his temples in frustration. Either no one was answering or no one was available, even when he tried begging them for help. He didn’t know whether this was his bad luck or Natsume’s. Then again, it was probably their bad luck combined. 

Shit… Natsume needed him more than ever, and he was proving to be useless. If only he had more power, he’d actually be able to protect him.

“So you’re here after all,” a sickeningly familiar voice came from behind him, making him stiffen. Of all the people to just show up out of the blue, it _had_ to be Matoba. What did Natsume do to even accumulate this much bad luck?

“What are you doing here?” Natori blurted out before taking a deep breath, trying to calm down. As much as both he and Natsume hated Matoba, he was both knowledgeable and powerful. If anyone could save Natsume, it was him. 

“That’s one way to greet someone,” Matoba smiled, Natori finding it unsettling as always. “We received several reports of youkai gathering here in packs, making some of the local ill. Since this is your territory, I wanted to see why you were slacking off.” He tilted his head a bit to the side, his one eye bearing deep into the other as if trying to read him. “Are they too much for the infamous Shuuchi Natori to handle?”

Shit, Natori hadn’t even thought about everyone else in town. He knew the youkai were all after Natsume, so he didn’t even think about how their presence would affect others. 

“I’m dealing with it,” he said, his voice just as stiff as he was. 

“Are you now?” Matoba mockingly smirked. “Is that why you sounded so frantic on the phone a moment ago?”

Natori clenched his fists and bit back a growl. The other had no clue what happened, he couldn’t snap at him for being insensitive - yet. “Yes,” he hated to admit, not making eye contact. “I highly doubt they’re going to attack someone, not when they’re all after the same person.”

Matoba’s smirk fell, a tinge of curiosity filling that haunting dark eye. “Oh? Who could be so important they’d ignore all the other ‘snacks’ that walk by?”

This whole situation just kept getting worse with no light in sight. As much as it nauseated him, and as much as he didn’t want Matoba _near_ Natsume, he knew this was the only choice they had. No one else was available, no one else could make it. And unlike some of the others, he knew Matoba was strong enough to help. 

“Would you be willing to help me with a job? I’d pay you as if I was the commissioner,” Natori asked, one of his lenses glaring over. 

Matoba’s smirk fell into a look of suspicion. “Why would you want to act as a client if you’re just asking for help on a job?” 

“Because I don’t want the client to be responsible for any charges or requests. I want to be solely responsible for the payment.”

Realization seemed to dawn upon Matoba as his smirk returned. “Does this have anything to do with Natsume?”

“Yes,” he said seriously, his tone making the other frown again. It obviously wasn’t the reaction he was hoping for. 

“What’s going on here, Natori?”

He told him everything, about the kidnapping and the possession. The other didn’t interrupt him once and remained stoic, making it impossible to see how he felt about the whole thing, though he could swear Matoba’s posture fell a bit. 

When he was finished the other exorcist sighed, watching the wind blow leaves off a dying tree. “I see, so that’s why you were so frantic,” he said as the wind slowly died down again, a small smile forming on his face. 

“Like I said, I’ll be the one paying you, not Natsume, me-”

“No, I think I’ll do this one for free,” he smirked, a devious look filling his eyes. “I could benefit from Natsume owing me a favor.”

The color immediately drained from Natori’s face. He made a mistake, he should’ve _never_ gotten Matoba involved. “Like I said before, I’ll be the one commissioning you, _not_ him, me-”

“It doesn’t matter even if you paid me, we both know his nature.” Matoba’s dark eyes suddenly fell along with his smile. Natori couldn’t tell if the new expression was one of disgust or sorrow. “Like the kind hearted fool he is, he’ll make sure to return the favor. However it’s me who owes him for his help.”

He was right. As much as Natori hated to admit it, Matoba was right. Natsume was such a kind hearted fool he’d even want to repay Matoba back. However, Natori would have to be sure Natsume understood it was Matoba who was returning the favor. 

“There’s a mix of allies and enemies among the youkai. Most of the allies are gathered at the hospital watching over him. So unless one attacks, please refrain from exorcising them”

Matoba’s eye widened, becoming intrigued. “Oh?” He smirked, looking towards the hospital where Misuzo peeked over the roof upon sensing the new exorcist. Matoba remembered seeing this one once from a distance when he had captured Natsume in the Eastern Forest a while back. 

“They know who you are, and they won’t hesitate to attack if they sense any ill intent towards Natsume or the others. Besides, if you hurt any of them-”

“Natsume would hate me,” the other finished with a smile. “I know. I’d hate for that to happen, especially since he’s so _useful_.”

Natori _hated_ that response, but let it go. “When can you come?”

Matoba snorted as he put one hand on his hip. “I’m always prepared, as every exorcist should be. Some of my clan are even stationed near the forest, waiting for me to give the command to start exercising the youkai there.”

“Just remember what I said,” the actor mumbled as he led the way. The closer they got the more amazed Matoba seemed to become as that sickening smile kept widening on his face. 

As they neared the hospital Misuzu turned to them, glowering darkly. “You brought back a roach. Should I take care of it?”

Natori let his shoulders sink. “We didn’t have a lot of options.”

“I’ve seen you before. What kind of contract do you and Natsume share?” Matoba asked, not showing a single sign of fear. Even Natori still felt uneasy talking to the horse youkai as he grew slightly pale.

“Tch, like you’d understand,” Misuzu hissed, looking back to Natori. “Are you sure he can be trusted?”

“Like I said, we don’t have much of a choice-”

“And I rather like Natsume,” Matoba added, finding the situation amusing. Even powerful youkai like this knew and hated the Matoba clan; he took it as a compliment. “He’s rather useful to have around.”

“And this is the only use you have,” the youkai bellowed, the area darkening despite the sun peeking through the clouds. “If you do anything to my master, even the youkai after your family’s eye will cower before my wrath.”

The smile completely fell from Matoba’s face, making Natori curse under his breath. Misuzu just _had_ to go there. “Focus on keeping the other youkai out,” he hissed, hoping the other wasn’t too upset about the comment as he headed into the hospital. 

“Such mouthy youkai,” the head exorcist mumbled, not sounding mad, just thoughtful. “I see where Natsume gets it.”

Natori wasn’t sure what he meant by that, so he merely continued on, hoping Taki and Tanuma weren’t in the room. They held little to no power, so Matoba shouldn’t be interested in them, however they were still Natsume’s friends. That fact alone would make him interested in them. 

As they neared the room Matoba looked around, feeling eyes on them. “What’s the excuse you have going for the doctors? They don’t exactly believe in our work.”

“We don’t have to worry about them,” Natori reassured as he put his hand on the door handle, hesitant. He really didn’t trust Matoba… he just had to hope bringing him into this would be worth it. “Hinoe and Misuzu took care of them.” Before the other could ask for elaboration, he opened the door, letting the clan’s head eye settle upon Natsume, allowing him to take in his condition. For once he didn’t have any witty or passive aggressive remarks; he didn’t even assess the youkai present in the room despite how powerful they were. 

He just stared at Natsume, completely stoic.

“Do you sense anything?” Natori couldn’t help but ask, wondering if he could feel something he and the others couldn’t. The other’s eye narrowed, almost in frustration.

“Two curses filled with powerful negative energy,” he said, his eyes slowly moving up to Nyanko Sensei who stayed strangely quiet. “As powerful as you are, you’re awfully useless.”

“We’ve already given him hell,” Hinoe said, her tone so dark and cold it literally sent shivers down the actor’s back. He was thankful he was on her good side. “Why’d you bring scum back?”

Immediately he paled over, praying Matoba wouldn’t take offense to their words. “He was the only one available,” he quickly admitted, watching the exorcist amusingly smirk. 

“Thankfully for Natsume,” he said, glancing back to the coma induced child. “I can’t think of an exorcist powerful enough to deal with whatever youkai’s inside him. Not even I can sense it.” Natori’s eyes widened in absolute shock. Not even Matoba could sense it? “A kid with powerful youkai servants like this are bound to attract powerful enemies - I warned him this could happen.” His eye fell though, as if realizing the youkai was probably the aftermath of what Natsume’s uncle did to him. For once, the other almost seemed at a loss for words, something Natori never thought he’d ever witness. 

“And a shady exorcist who follows the same hateful path as his ancestors remains alone,” Hinoe merely smirked, a devious fiery glint flaring in her eyes. “Unlike Natsume, no one would come running if you were in this position. Most youkai would actually prevent selfish exorcists from trying to use the opportunity of freeing you just to become famous.”

Matoba couldn’t help but smile again as he put a hand on his hip, snapping out of his previous mood. “You’re probably right. But that’s the difference between me and dear Natsume.” His eye narrowed darkly, obviously annoyed with the meaningless chit chat. “I wouldn’t fall prey to such curse, let alone youkai.” 

He didn’t say human, though Natori wasn’t sure what that meant. 

The heart monitor suddenly changed, signalling Natsume’s heart rate rising. Everyone quickly turned, feeling the darkness practically pour into the room again.

The youkai heard them, it was waking up. 

Nyanko Sensei sat up and took a few steps back from the bed, resisting the strong urge to literally eat them all for being so damn annoying. “Stop arguing and do something!” He snapped bitterly, his seriousness almost off putting.

“Right,” Natori said, relieved to see Hiiragi and the others had fixed the magic circle and replaced the papers while he was gone. He’d have to remember to thank them once this was over. 

Taking out a protective charm, he got in position. “Ready?” He asked Matoba and Hinoe who both nodded. He saw Misuzu peek through the window again, ready to spit if need be. 

Hopefully it wouldn’t come to that. They couldn’t fail Natsume a third time. 

They started the chant, Hinoe saying her own incantation as the circle became a deep gold color. A soft wind started picking up again, the breathing mask falling from Natsume’s cracked and swollen lips. The seals against his chest started to shake, not from the wind, but from the energy and poison that was leaving his body.

“Fools,” the deep voice from earlier rumbled again, that poisonous stench flowing from the unconscious boy. “Didn’t you _learn_?”

No one spoke, no one fed into the monster’s ploy. 

That only seemed to anger it.

Without warning the seals burst into flames as Natsume’s body sat up in the blink of an eye, the creature coughing and hacking up black sludge as it held it’s chest.

Natori’s eyes widened in fear, recalling the _two_ fractured ribs. Did that _thing_ just break them?!

“Focus,” Nyanko hissed, forcing Natori to concentrate again. They could worry about that later. If they couldn’t save his mind it’d be useless to worry about his body.

Those dark sludgy eyes opened again, staring right at Matoba with a dark permeating chuckle. “Bringing the big guns in are we? You’re all fools to trust a Matoba. The boy’s better off with me, with all the other kids!”

It wasn’t moving much, in fact it looked severely affected this time. The light from the circle was getting brighter and brighter, for once being brighter than Natori could handle. Everything was blurring and meshing together, images swam through his mind-

Of a small lonely blond child shivering in a pile of dirty laundry, of that same boy having his hair grabbed and head held in a _toilet_ , thrashing for his very life as he choked on the waste water.

 _‘Yes…,’_ the dark voice purred, sounding less deep and fainter than earlier.

Glass shattered and the child yelped. Large hands wrapped around his tiny neck, those small fingers desperately clawing at the wrist.

 _‘More…_ **_more_** _.’_

The child was famished, hardly able to move, but the pain - he could concentrate on the pain instead of the hunger.

_‘Feed me… feed me your misery!’_

Rain. It was raining. The child was very weakly digging in the mud around a metal pole, looking so _tired_ , so scared, so-

Natsume. He was seeing Natsume as a child. There were horrible blistering burns on his arms and back along with horrible bruises with a collared chain fastened around his neck.

 _‘So much misery… so much_ **_pain_ ** _. More… I need more, I need it with me - in me-!’_

The child looked up in absolute terror, those warm golden eyes unmistakable as something came rushing at him.

That was Natsume as a child, and that youkai in the visions was the one possessing him now.

All the energy was drained from Natori’s body as he collapsed, something gently catching him before he fell on his face.

“Master,” he heard Hiiragi faintly say, making the exorcist open his eyes. He saw Urihime supporting Matoba who had collapsed as well while Sasago was supporting Hinoe who did not look happy about it. “Are you okay?”

Natori didn’t respond as his eyes panned over to Natsume, seeing Chobihige gently supporting the unconscious child. Blood was seeping down his eyes, nose and the side of his mouth, making the exorcist’s heart nearly stop as he panicked. The child was as pale as a ghost and he could faintly hear a elongated noise, meaning the machine detected no heart beat-!

“He’s okay, it fled,” Hiiragi informed, confusing the exorcist greatly. “A handful of youkai tried storming the hospital during the spell, distracting the ugly cat, Hineo and Matoba.”

“But the spell cast the youkai out and weakened it,” Urihime finished. “Although it would’ve been dealt with if that useless horse was paying more attention to the forest.”

“I was protecting my master!” Misuzu growled back, to which Hiiragi ignored.

“Thanks to a few other youkai, they didn’t reach the room.”

“Tch, like we could’ve exorcised it in one go,” Hinoe hissed this time, trying to pull herself free, but was too weak. “We chased it out of him and broke the first curse, but not the second.”

 _‘Shit,’_ Natori grumbled, looking back over to the child where Chobihige and - Natori’s eyes widened in shock - was that Kai gently cleaning Natsume’s face off? The god lived in the mountains, how did it hear about his condition and when did he get here?

And that fox child - it was gently holding Natsume’s hand. Didn’t they say they lived far away too?

“We can’t do anything about the second,” Matoba said, sounding out of breath despite trying to hide it. “Not without tracking down the youkai that placed it.”

“You mean we have to track that thing down?” Matoba looked over at Natori, that gaze seeming slightly disappointed. 

“What did you see, Natori?”

The actor bit his bottom lip, not wanting to say it outloud. Those were dark times for Natsume, times he never shared with anyone. “I saw that thing chasing him as a child,” he vaguely said, making the other smirk in amusement.

“I saw that, but I also saw another youkai.” He slowly went to stand, finding his legs weaker than he would’ve liked. Urihime stayed close, knowing the stubborn exorcist could fall any second. As much as she wanted that to happen, she didn't want her master paying the price for it. “It was a cursed god speaking to Natsume when he was kidnapped. I believe I’ve seen it before. I’ll have my people do a search and contact you when I have an update.”

Natori felt worry knot his stomach, not liking Matoba staying involved beyond the exorcism. What if he changed his mind and decided to force Natsume into something! “Matoba-” 

“Don’t worry,” he cut him off, turning his back to him. “It’s like I said, I’m only returning the favor.” His eyes slowly settled upon all the youkai in the room, finally seeming interested in them. 

“He has youkai that’ll come to him without being called,” he mumbled, this moment reminding him of when he captured Natsume in the Eastern Forest. 

_‘Why do you side with the youkai? They deceive and betray humans. You’ve experienced that, I’m sure. And more than once or twice.’_

_‘You’re right. But that’s not all. Some aren’t like that…’_

_‘Have you met many like that?’_ He remembered asking. Glancing around the room again, he saw the horse youkai staring him down at him protectively as a powerful yet horrified child gently cleaned Natsume's face while a fox child sobbed into Natsume’s hand, begging him to wake up. The youkai with the large head and mustache was holding Natsume very carefully against himself, obviously waiting until they figured out what to do from there with the machine flatlining and all. Nyanko Sensei was gently nuzzling the back of Natsume’s head, probably trying to give him some of his energy to help him stay stable until the doctors came in. A kappa was holding a bottle of water, waving it towards Natsume’s direction and crying as he was held back by a ram youkai that sat with one wearing the same robes, the two of them sniffling and telling the Kappa to wait until the humans came. 

A butterfly phased through the window, a youkai morphing from it seconds after. “I brought some herbs that are said to strengthen human bones and help with fevers!”

So, this is what Natsume meant. All the youkai presently here were genuinely concerned for his well being. Even someone like himself could see that. Of course they all probably had something to gain by being at his side, that’s just how youkai worked. But it did make him wonder how they acted around Natsume normally.

“We’ll always come for him, even if he tells us not to,” Hinoe said as she noticed he hadn’t left yet. 

Matoba frowned, realizing he was caught staring. “How did he form a contract with you?” He asked, making her click her tongue.

“You exorcist types are so obsessed with contracts that you forget the strongest bond of all.”

“And what’s that?” He asked curiously. 

“Something someone like _you_ wouldn’t understand.” There was no use trying to explain it to him, it wouldn’t change his way or give him a new purpose in life.

Matoba couldn't help but let out a small chuckle as he headed out the door. “You’re probably right about that.” 

_“I have my own way of being connected with others,”_ he recalled Natsume saying, making him smirk. Natsume protected him on more than one occasion and even tried to cheer him up with a fruit despite hating him. That kindness made it easy to manipulate Natsume, and yet there was something about his actions that drew him towards the boy, almost making him want to protect him for more reasons aside from being useful. He’s asked him to join the clan more than once, where he could be kept safe from youkai and human scrutiny.

And yet the danger that nearly killed him this time wasn’t caused by a youkai, it was caused by a human. As much as he wanted to boast that they could have prevented this if he had been part of the clan, he honestly wasn’t sure. Natsume’s uncle was no exorcist, and the people who kidnapped Natsume weren’t either. They were normal humans with bad intentions who didn’t even realize they had a youkai bound to them; the cursed god he saw in the vision. 

He wondered how Natsume would answer him if he asked him to join again. Would he respond the same way as he did in the Eastern Forest?

 _‘It’s true that it’s been difficult at times, but I’ve met many kind people.’_ Would he still say that after the hell these humans put him through? After the damage they did to him and the damage they did to the others he saw in his vision? Matoba only saw one instance, he couldn’t even imagine what else the other witnessed. 

How much did this event change his outlook? Would he even consider humans worth saving from youkai after this?

 _‘This has become rather bothersome and intriguing,’_ he mumbled to himself as he pulled out his phone. “It pays to maintain good relationships with powerful people.” He smirked, clicking on one of the contacts. 

\----

Very gently Chobihige and Kai lowered Natsume back against the bed just as Natori heard panicked footsteps rushing towards them, yellowing out code blue. Natori tried to stand, but was held down by Hiiragi.

“I can’t be here, they’ll think it was me-”

“They won’t see you,” Chobi reassured. The door burst open before Natori could ask them to elaborate as the doctor and nurses ran over to Natsume, looking horribly puzzled. He was disconnected from everything aside from the needle in his arm that was hooked up to the IV and medication. They didn’t even notice the circle on the ground, thank gods. The papers couldn’t be seen by normal humans, but the writing was definitely visible. 

“Takashi Natsume, can you hear me?” The doctor asked. When there was no response the nurses came forward and started hooking everything up to him again. “Takashi Natsume?” He lifted one of his eyelids and took a small flashlight, shining it over his pupil.

There was a reaction. Unlike before it actually dilated in and out normally. 

“Draw some blood, let’s test it again. I want one of the family members monitoring him twenty four seven; I think he woke up and panicked.”

 _‘If only,’_ Natori sighed, closing his eyes, finally able to fall unconscious knowing Natsume was okay.


	5. Home

Where am I? It’s cold… so,  _ cold… _

My hands move up and rub my upper arms, but it does little to nothing to ease the chill. 

It’s dark… why is it so dark? 

Slowly I open my heavy eyes, hardly noticing a difference.

Strange… how can it be so dark when I hear so much? The cawing of seagulls, the crashing of waves, people’s laughter and chatter - the soothing sound of water gently moving up the sand before receding.

I rarely go to the beach, but I know the sounds and smells. The salt water makes my eyes burn slightly as I try to savor this moment.

But I can’t. There’s a deep uneasy knot in the pit of my stomach that’s telling me to scream for help.

My voice is gone though, I can’t speak. I can barely breath.

My arms are pinned to my sides, along with my feet.

I can’t move. 

Not like this…  _ please  _ not like this. I can’t be trapped again!

Cold water brushes my feet, making my heart stop in my chest.

The water is rising. Sharp pain echoes through my left arm as I try to move it. 

It’s broken. When did I break it? More importantly, how am I going to get out of this?

_ ‘Sensei-’  _ I yell, finding my voice swallowed by a cloth in my mouth. My eyes widen, my breathing quickens as a full on panic attack settles in. Desperately I thrash around only for the pain in my broken arm to grow, which worsens my panic attack. Tears of fear trail down my cheeks as I try to scream at the top of my lungs.

_ ‘Sensei! Nyanko Sensei!!’ _ I try, but no words echo past the cloth.

No one can hear me, and no one knows where I am. The beach is far from home, no one would even think to search for me here. 

_ ‘Help me… someone... anyone…’ _

The cold water rushes up my legs and stops at my hips, making me whimper.

_ ‘I’m coming-’  _ a very faint voice whispers, so faint I almost dismiss it as my imagination. _ ‘I’ll find you-’ _

_ ‘Takashi,‘ _ my eyes widen in shock, hearing Shigeru’s voice. There’s a warmth on my shoulder, a warmth that helps me take a deep shuddery breath. What’s Shigeru doing here? How did he find me? 

_ ‘If only you could see how many people are here to support you.’ _

Huh? What’s he talking about?

_ ‘Come on Natsume,’ _ Nishumura’s voice calls right after, only making him more confused. _ ‘Wake up already or we’ll graduate without you!’ _

_ ‘He’ll wake up way before then,’ _ Kitamoto scolded the other. _ ‘Get better soon Natsume, we got fishing to do!’ _

_ ‘Seriously? We have final exams coming up and all you guys can think about is fishing? You can’t leave me with all these irresponsible delinquents Natsume,’ _ Sasada’s voice came next.  _ ‘Besides, you already promised we’d all go to the art museum, so you better wake up while they still have a good student discount going!’ _

_ ‘You should see what Sasada had the whole school make for you,’  _ Taki chimed in, her voice hoarse as if she was sleep deprived.  _ ‘There’s a thousand of them, each made while praying for your safety and health.” _

_ “I-it was a group effort,”  _ Sasada bashfully retorted. _ “The teachers helped too!” _

_ “The Fujiwaras and my father made some as well,”  _ Tanuma said, sounding even worse than Taki. 

_ “Hey, what am I, chopped liver?”  _ Shibata snapped, oddly sounding exhausted as well. _ “I know you’ll wake up, you’re tougher than this!” _

_“He’s right,”_ Natori said next, his voice almost sounding hollow, as if he hadn’t slept in a week. _“You’ve become quite the popular guy. You’re almost as popular as me,’_ he tried to joke, but there was an underlying sadness the exorcist couldn’t hide from him. _‘Wake up soon Natsume, we’re all waiting for you.’_

I can hear them - I hear all of them surrounding me with their love. I take another deep breath and find myself completely wrapped in their warmth. My arm’s fixed; I’m no longer bound. My feet start moving as I follow their voices towards a growing light - and home. 

The light vanishes - it’s dark again. But that’s okay -  _ he’s  _ okay. The voices are a lot louder than before, but far less in number. 

Sluggishly he opened his eyes, the bright light forcing him to close them, unintentionally letting out a pained groan. 

The voices stop, the room instantly filling with silence. Fear slowly bubbles into his heart, wondering if he had just imagined the voices altogether. But how was that possible when the voices made him  _ feel  _ that way? 

“Natsume?” Natsume’s heart stopped in his chest, realizing that voice belonged to Natori.

Forcing his eyes open, he grimaced from the light. Strange, it was never this bright in the barn. But if Natori was here, then this couldn’t be the barn. Maybe he was at a hospital, like the one he saw in his nightmare. 

Summoning what little strength and courage he had left, he tried to speak. “N-nn-” only to erupt in violent dry coughs, his eyes forcing themselves shut as pain shot through his chest and down to his spine.

Oh, there’s the pain. At least he could speak; it was rare not being gagged anymore. He was so relieved a small tear slid past his cheek.

“-need to take it easy,” Hinoe’s voice slowly rang, making him even more confused. Hinoe and Natori were in the same room? That was definitely a combination he thought he’d never witness. 

Taking another deep shuddering breath, he opened his eyes again, seeing both their worried and pale faces staring down at him. The ceiling above them wasn’t dark brown wood, it was  _ white _ tile, which could only mean one thing: He  _ was  _ in a hospital, not the barn. He was  _ finally _ out of there, finally in the soft and gentle hands of people who cared about him. Tears of pure relief fell past his cheeks as he looked between the two, his weak fingers clenching the sheets as he let out a choked sob. 

No more punches, no more blades, no more cigarettes, no more water - just recovery. 

“Are you in any pain?” Natori quickly asked upon seeing the tears, to which the boy merely shook his head, finding it agonizing to do so and immediately regretted it. 

“N-no,” he managed out, those pale cracked lips slowly smiling in pure relief. “Wh-ere?”

“He found you in the woods,” Nyanko’s voice came this time, making Natsume’s eyes widen in relief. Nyanko Sensei was here too? More tears gathered in his eyes as warmth fluttered into his heart, feeling fully safe for the first time in what felt like ages. Knowing Natori was here made him feel comfortable sure, but Sensei made him feel at home. 

He opened his mouth to speak, only to feel his entire body freeze over in an instant. Something brushed his leg, something was  _ touching _ him. No cry or gasp left his lips, so used to being gagged during the majority of the captivity. 

Natori quickly pulled Nyanko Sensei from the bed and into his arms, both of their faces filling with deep concern. “It’s okay, it was just Sensei,” the exorcist reassured, relief washing over his face as Natsume finally started breathing again. 

Strange, he didn’t even notice he stopped. He just braced himself to feel pain. Part of him was concerned as to why he didn’t feel it. It must’ve been because they were real, right?

“Sen... sei,” he choked, finding himself at the verge of another violent coughing fit. “Is this… real?”

“It is,” Hinoe reassured as she took a step towards Natori, coming into his line of sight again. “Take it easy, you’ve been through a lot.”

“As much as I don’t want to, we have to call the doctors in to take a look at you.” The exorcist very slowly reached over and pressed the emergency call button that was resting at the edge of the hospital bed’s gate, watching with both anger and sorrow as Natsume tensed considerably, just as he did with Sensei. “Sorry, the doctors need to check you over,” Natori explained as Sensei jumped out of his arms, not wanting the doctor or nurse to see him. “You were in a coma, mostly induced by a curse, but they need to make sure you’re alright.” 

Natsume’s eyes widened in absolute horror at the news. He had been comatose? For how long, and why??

No, that wasn’t important - Toshiki was. He didn’t have much time before he was dumped in the forest, so how much time did he have now?

“H-how long?!” He asked, his whole body shaking. What if it was already too late?

“The doctor will explain-”

“How long?!” His voice got stronger through his desperation. Natori’s eyes widened more, sensing the underlying serious tone and stiff body language.

“It’s been three days.”

Three days?? It certainly wasn’t ideal, but they could work with it - they still had time. 

“I-” the door to his room opened, his words halting. Talking drew attention to himself, he couldn’t let that man hear him-!

“It’s just the doctor and nurse,” Natori gently explained, seeing the fear fully encompass him. The doctor and nurse both smiled warmly at him, their pace slowing as to not frighten him, but his attention was no longer on them. 

Just past Natori and in front of the door, his eyes settled upon Shigeru and Touko who were sleeping against each other on some chairs where Tanuma and Taki were standing behind, their tearful horribly sleep deprived eyes staring right at him. They were holding back for his sake, he realized. They didn’t want to overcrowd him, and Natsume was more than grateful as he was overwhelmingly glad to see them.

“Everyone out,” the doctor ordered. As soon as he did the Fujiwaras woke up, blinking awake at the commotion. Despite seeing their faces, fear started settling in with that command. 

Everyone out? But he just woke up - he just got here! Why did they have to leave? He didn’t want them to leave - he didn’t even get to talk to them yet! What if they were seperated and this was the last time he got to see them?!

“Don’t worry, they aren’t going anywhere,” Natori motioned to Hinoe and Hiiragi, realizing Natsume was no longer paying attention to him as his eyes met his foster parent. Taking a deep breath he looked at Hiiragi, who nodded. 

“We’ll protect him,” she reassured. 

“Takashi-!!” The Fujiwaras both gasped as they ran to the bed, ignoring the doctor’s order. Tears of pure relief gathered in their eyes as Touko very gently reached out with her warm and gentle hand towards his face. Natsume couldn’t help the way he tensed and squeezed his eyes shut, feeling that hesitant hand caressing his cheek. 

Warm… it was warm, the same warmth he felt in his sleep. The tension immediately left as he opened his eyes again, staring at both of them with more tears starting to well. 

This wasn’t an illusion, this was real -  _ they  _ were real. He was finally safe; he was finally  _ home _ .

“You’re awake - thank the gods you’re awake!” She cried in pure happiness. 

“Are you hurting anywhere?” Shirgeru asked, to which Natsume gently shook his head, more tears falling down his cheeks as he ignored the pain. 

“I-I’m okay, s-sorry-” his sore and dry throat couldn’t handle so many words as he started coughing again. Immediately the doctor and nurse came over, forcing the Fujiwara’s back. 

“Please leave the room. We need to check him over and make sure he’s okay. You can come back in once we’re finished.”

As much as the couple didn’t want to leave their son, they both sighed, knowing it was best. “We’ll be right back, okay? We’re gonna be on the other side of the door, waiting to be let in again, promise.”

Natsume didn’t want them to leave - he was terrified he’d never see them again! For all he knew this doctor and nurse actually worked for that man. His racing heart was detected by the machines, making him stiffen a bit. He didn’t want to worry them anymore but he was  _ finally _ home, what if something ripped him away again?!

“We won’t let them hurt you,” Misuzu’s voice reassured from outside, making Natsume grow still in confusion. Was that Misuzu? How? Despite the pain, he slowly glanced over to the rest of the room, feeling his heart swell in relief and happiness. The Dog’s Circle was there smiling warmly and worriedly. Misuzu was peeking in through the window, Hinoe was standing next to Chobihige and Kappa while the Middle Ranks were sitting on the ground drinking sake. He could make out Sensei’s eyes from underneath a jacket left by someone on a chair, obviously trying to blend in so he wouldn’t get thrown out. Considering Hiiragi moved to stand behind the chair, it must’ve been Natori’s jacket. 

He wasn’t alone, he’d never be alone again even as the Fujiwaras closed the door on their way out. 

“Hello Takashi Natsume, I’m doctor Irie Kyosuke, but call me Dr Irie. You’ve been in my care since you arrived. How are you feeling?” Natsume slowly turned his attention back to the humans, his neck intensely sore and throat aching. He wasn’t sure how much he could talk, but the faster they left the better.

“I-” he didn’t last one syllable as he started violently coughing again, his entire body igniting in pain. His breathing started to get shallow as his ears started ringing again, making him feel even more disoriented than before. 

“Don’t speak,” the doctor quickly instructed, hardly audible above the ringing. “You were severely dehydrated and malnourished when you were brought in, we had to use a feeding tube yesterday. We’re going to give you something that’ll help. But in order for us to do that, we have to raise the bed a bit, okay?”

Natsume bite his bottom lip, not wanting to feel the pain that wracked his body earlier. But if he wanted the others to come back he needed to do what they said. 

Nodding slightly, the nurse picked up the remote that was strapped to the side of the bed and pressed a button on it. The upper part of the bed instantly started raising, the pain in his chest becoming sharp and prominent. 

Pain is temporary, he reminded himself as he took a deep breath through his nose, ignoring the black dots that plagued his vision. 

“I need you to take a drink, okay?” The doctor instructed. Natsume looked over at him, not even realizing the bed stopped moving. “It’ll soothe your throat and make it easier to talk.” When the solution was offered, he reached up to take it, but found it very hard to move his hands even an inch off the bed. It felt like his blood had been replaced with lead! Fear starting bubbling within him again, wondering if there was something wrong with him. 

“Don’t worry, you’ll recover,” Hinoe said from the foot of the bed, trying to help him calm down. “We dispelled a curse a few hours ago, your body hasn’t recovered from it yet. The medicine they’re giving you was made by Benio, we just made them think it’s from their storeroom.”

_ ‘A curse?’  _ Natsume wanted to ask, but held back. They broke the sleeping curse, not the other. Thank goodness. 

“That’s okay, the nurse will gently tilt it into your mouth, okay?” The doctor said as the said nurse brought the small cup to his lips. It smelled like berries and mint, which was an odd combination. It was made by Benio though, so he decided not to question it as he opened his mouth, swallowing the solution. As it slid down his throat, it seemed to coat it, much to his surprise. The mint even helped soothe the burning sensation while also clearing up his sinuses. 

“Is that better?”

“Yes,” Natsume smiled, his voice still raspy but much better and stronger than before. He could even breath a little easier now while the pain in his throat nearly completely vanished. 

“Good,” the doctor smiled back. “As the others probably informed you, you’ve been comatose since you were found three days ago. I’m going to ask a series of questions. Please answer them to the best of your ability.”

“Okay,” Natsume agreed, seeing the doctor waiting for a response from him. 

“Do you remember your name?” 

“Yes, I’m Takashi Natsume,” he said, though found the answer almost felt foreign on his tongue.

“How old are you?” 

“Sixteen,” he said, feeling his mind getting a little hazy. Was it because of the medicine, or perhaps his condition? The doctor and the nurse looked at him a bit in concern, but didn’t say anything. 

“When’s your birthday?”

“July first.” The doctor took out a small flashlight from his pocket and shined it in one of his eyes. Natsume knew better than to shy from it, but the beam was so powerful it became painful. The ringing from earlier slowly started fading back with a vengeance, getting louder and louder the more the doctor shined the light in his eyes.

“How old are you, Takashi?”

Natsume’s eyes scrunched in confusion, his head starting to ache horribly. Didn’t he just answer that? “Sixteen.” 

The doctor and nurse grew worried as the ringing grew even more intense, making it hard to hear. “When is your bir-” the rest was lost as a sharp pain coursed through his head, forcing him to squeeze his eyes tightly shut. 

Dizzy, he was so dizzy, and cold. He couldn’t help the way his body shuddered, the strong smell of salt water overwhelming his nostrils as his head pounded harder than a jackhammer. 

_ ‘Don’t worry, I’ll find you,’ _ he heard himself whisper faintly against his will. _ ‘I’ll help you, I promise I’ll help you - I’ll help all of you-’ _

Natsume felt his eyes snap open, finding himself looking up at the tiled ceiling again. The lights were dimmed a bit, which made it easier for his eyes to adjust this time. 

“Takashi,” he felt a warm hand clench his, making him immediately stiffen. That voice though - slowly he turned his sore neck and saw Touko smiling tiredly at him. Shigeru was asleep in the chair next to her, his arms crossed and body hunched forward a bit. It was obvious he tried so hard to stay awake, he probably  _ just  _ fell asleep too based off the position he was in.

“How are you feeling?” She asked softly, bringing his attention back to her.

“Confused,” he admitted as his eyebrows slowly knitted together, his orbs searching the room for the doctor and nurse. Where were they? And where were Natori, Taki and Tanuma? Sensei was in his true form with his head resting against his bed while the Middle ranks and Hinoe were sitting by the window-

Wait, it was dark outside - was it night already?!

“Wasn’t I just… talking to the doctor?”

Touko’s breath hitched as she brought his hand up to her cheek, more worry enveloping her features. “You passed out,” she said as she pressed a kiss to the back of his hand, her breath shuddering against it. “They… they said you were confused and didn’t remember much.”

“What?” Natsume blanched, shaking his head ever so slightly. There was  _ no _ way he got those questions wrong. He turned to his youkai friends, seeing Nyanko sadly shake his head yes.

“Wh-what did I say?” His voice trembled. How… could he have gotten them wrong?

“You said you were eight, and that your birthday was February twenty first.”

His face paled over instantly. That was  _ not _ what he said, he was absolutely sure of it.

“I’m… sixteen, and my birthday is July first!” He croaked, squeezing Touko’s hand back in fear.

Light reignited in her eyes as she hiccuped into a small relieved sigh. “Oh thank goodness,” she sniffled, holding his hand to her chest as she leaned over the bed a bit, pressing the call button with her free one. “I knew you’d remember.” 

They were always so quick to click that button - all he wanted was some time to talk to his loved ones and tell them what was going on. No one could be trusted, not even the cops that would no doubt enter the room to take his statement later.

He needed to talk to Natori and his youkai friends together. He needed both of their opinions since this involved both humans and youkai. 

Before he could ask Touko where Natori went, the door to his room opened, the same doctor and nurse coming in. Touko turned to them with such a happy relieved smile it was contagious; he didn’t have the heart to blow the staff off completely. Shigeru stirred when they entered, but stayed quiet. “He remembered this time.”

“How are you feeling Takashi?” The doctor asked softly. When Touko tried pulling her hand free to give the doctor some space, Natsume only held it tighter.

He didn’t want her to go, not this time. 

“Confused,” he said, trying his best to cover the quiver in his voice. “I know my birthday is July first and I’m sixteen years old. I could’ve sworn I said that.”

The doctor smiled even more when Natsume said the answers correctly this time. “That’s correct,” he said, his smile falling shortly after. “You kept insisting you were eight and your birthday was February twenty first. We took some scans of your brain again and even ran some labs, both came back negative.”

Natsume felt his eyes tremble a bit. They came back negative, meaning they didn’t know why that happened to him?

“It’s… entirely possible that what you’re being affected by isn’t on the physical level, but on the psychological level, which is normal considering what you went through,” the doctor said, making Natsume’s trembles slow a bit. “After the Chief of Police arrives and takes your statement, I’ll see if our in house therapist has some time to see you.”

Natsume felt his anxiety rise. He didn’t want to talk about it - he refused to go back there so soon  _ especially  _ with people he didn’t know if he could trust!

“I’m fine,” he insisted, holding Touko’s hand back tightly. What should he do? Even if he told the Chief of Police everything, there was no way of knowing if they were part of the Yakuza or not. He learned from his mistake, the lingering pain in his left fingers reminded him. 

“I understand, but it’s hospital policy for someone with your case,” the doctor informed.

Natsume didn’t care if it was hospital policy, he refused to speak to anyone outside his friends and family for now. Despite how long that list has become over the past few years, there were only a few people he felt he could rely on in this delicate situation. “I won’t talk to her,” he reaffirmed, leaving the Fujiwaras flabbergasted. They’ve never heard Natsume refuse someone in such a way before, let alone outright say no. 

The doctor looked annoyed as he went to speak, but Natsume beat him to it, his throat still scratchy. “Is Natori still here?” 

“Natori?” Touko asked, growing even more confused and concerned than before. 

“He went home three hours ago,” Shigeru informed, scooting a bit closer. It was obvious the Fujiwaras noticed the change in his demeanor, especially with the way Touko tightened her grip around his hand. “I can call him if you’d like.”

“It’s really late, it’s probably best-”

“If he came instead, you’re right!” Touko interrupted the nurse this time. “He’s trembling - you’re trembling Takashi, please stay calm, he’ll be here soon okay?” His and Touko’s joined hands started to shake, making the teen look down. He wasn’t doing that, it was Touko-!

Shigeru quickly got to his feet and went to the other side of the bed where the doctor and nurse were. Natsume braced to feel him grab hold of his injured hand, but he didn’t. He just stood there, shielding him from the peeved nurse. 

They were doing this for him.

“Sir, this isn’t protocol-”

“Putting our son into a full blown panic attack because you’re refusing what he needs to stay stable after what he went through should be against protocol,” he said sternly, eyes narrowing. “I’ll even let Natori take my place if that’ll make you happy.”

The nurse opened her mouth again, only to be stopped as the doctor gently placed a hand on her shoulder. “We’ll allow it, just this once considering what he’s been through. We’ll let the hospital staff know.” He pulled the nurse along without another word, not like they cared much. 

As soon as they left, Shigure pulled out - wait, was that a cell phone? When did he get a cellphone?

“Takashi,” Touko pulled his attention away from the other, his eyes widening as she held up a small box. “We… should’ve given this to you sooner,” she sniffled, guilt evident in her voice. “But now is better than never, right?” Natsume felt himself really tremble now, very slowly lifting his hand, his wrapped fingers gently sliding across the box in her hand.

He knew what it was without needing to open it and felt guilt wrap around his heart. He never wanted them to spend this kind of money on him. “Touko-”

“Don’t Takashi, just… don’t,” she said, her eyes downcast as she tightened the trembling grip she still had around him. “Don’t worry about the money, don’t worry about paying us back. For once, please… just worry about yourself,” she begged, her eyes finally meeting his. Natsume felt tears fall past his cheeks as he saw the pure love and worry in her eyes. Reality slowly hit him from a different perspective, reminding him that his kidnapping had worried them beyond sick. When he didn’t come home, they probably feared the worst - they probably thought they’d never see him again. There were times he thought he’d never see  _ them  _ again…

He couldn’t say no to her, not after this. “Thank you-” he sniffled, feeling like he could burst from their kindness. “Thank you.”

“It’s not just for you, it’s for us too,” Shigeru said as he came back to the bed, smiling softly down at him. “We’ll know when you’re running late and can ask you to run errands while you’re out with your friends. And if you’re ever lost, you can use the GPS to find your way home.” Shigeru took the phone from Touko and opened the box, revealing the bright red case around the phone. 

“We chose red so you won’t forget it,” he smiled, pressing a button to wake it up. “Natori programmed it for you with Tanuma and Taki’s help since we’re not tech savvy. We spoke to their parents and agreed it’d be best if you all had phones.”

Natsume’s eyes widened even more, recalling the few conversations he’s had with his friends about asking for phones. He hoped they weren’t upset with him.

“Natori said he’d be over right away,” Shigeru reassured, pulling him from his thoughts. “You know… if there’s anything you want to talk about, we’re here for you, no matter what.”

“I know,” the teen said, sniffling some more, not knowing what he ever did to deserve them as his guardians. He couldn’t tell them everything, but they at least had the right to know why he was suspicious. “I… uhm…” he averted his gaze to the sheets, his mind reeling in fear at the memory. “While I was… uhm, yeah, we escaped-” he stopped and closed his eyes, just letting himself breath for a moment as he felt himself nearly slip into a panic attack. He could do this, he had to do this. “We got to a gas station and told the clerk everything. Before he could even call for help… a cop came in… and… shot the clerk.”

Touko and Shigeru both gasped in horrified shock, to which he ignored.

If he stopped now, he wouldn’t get it out. 

“They’re everywhere,” he said, taking a few deep shuddering breaths. “They... could even be here.”

They grew silent, the severity of those words sinking in. The doctor could be part of the Yakuza - the nurse and even the police officer standing guard outside could be part of the Yakuza. As long as Takashi was in the hospital, he wasn’t safe. But where could he go? He needed medical attention and they needed police searching for the one who did this to him. 

“Natori… might have some ideas,” he said, finally opening his eyes a bit, though didn’t dare look up at them. “He’s an actor that knows how to stay off the radar. It’s… a long shot, but…”

Of course it wasn’t the only reason, but it was enough to make the Fujiwaras aware. More importantly, he wanted them to be  _ safe _ . They killed the clerk because he was a witness. They wouldn’t hesitate to kill his foster parents and friends too. 

When they didn’t respond, he clenched his injured hand’s fist as much as he could in anger - anger at his uncle, at his torturer Toma, and himself. If he hadn’t talked to those investigators, none of this would’ve happened - the Fujiwaras wouldn’t be in danger either. 

And yet… he couldn’t bring himself to regret coming forward. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, trembling a bit more. “I’m sorry… because of me, you’re both in danger-”

A hand pressed against his injured one, making him quickly squeeze his eyes shut, once again waiting for pain to follow shortly after. Instead the hand quickly pulled away. “Takashi,” Shigeru said in such a serious tone it made him slowly open his eyes. It was rare to hear him speak like this. “I know we aren’t your real parents, but we’re still a family. I’m not sure how you see us, but we see you as our own son. We’ll do whatever it takes to keep you safe.” Natsume felt tears welling in his eyes again, unable to look away from Shigeru’s intense loving gaze. 

They really saw him as their own child?

“He’s right,” Touko confirmed as she gently squeezed his hand. “When you… went missing, it literally felt like a part of us was torn away,” she sniffled, trying her best not to cry. “I know we aren’t perfect, we’ve never had a child of our own so we’re not really sure if we’re doing a good job or not. So when… you disappeared, we thought it was all our fault. After all, we should’ve asked the investigators if you were at risk and taken extra precautions until after the trial.”   
Natsume shook his head, more tears leaving him. She was wrong - there was nothing they could’ve done! “Touko-”

“We can’t change the past,” Shigeru said, making the teen turn back to him. “And saying we’ll prevent this from happening again is a lie. We don’t know what the future holds, and although we pray nothing like this will ever happen again, we don’t have the power to guarantee that. All we can do is our best to prevent it.”

Natsume was filled with so much warmth it confused him. Was this what it felt like knowing someone truly loved and cared about him? He literally couldn’t find the words as he let out a soft sob. 

What did he ever do to deserve such loving foster parents? An even more selfish question: Why couldn’t they have adopted him from the start? He knew the reason - they were very distant relatives to the point of almost not being related at all. But still… he couldn’t help but feel a little selfish. 

Yet after such a conversation, Natsume really wasn’t sure how to proceed from here without hurting and worrying the Fujiiwaras.

A gentle knock came at the door before it opened, revealing a disheveled out of breath Natori. His jacket wasn’t even on correctly while his glasses and hat were crooked. The Fujiwaras both smiled upon seeing him, unable to hide their relief and amusement. 

“Sorry for calling you so late,” Touko bowed a bit as the actor came forward, his and Natsume’s puffy red eyes meeting. 

“No no, I don’t mind at all,” he reassured as Hiiragi appeared behind him. “How are you feeling, Natsume?”

Natsume offered him a small smile, but even he knew it was a failed effort. He was starting to feel sleepy after the emotional event, which made him sigh.

Why was it so hard to keep his eyelids open now? He couldn’t fade, not this time. “I’m sorry to call you so late,” he said, taking a deep shuddering breath. “But… I need your help.”

As soon as he said help, Touko collapsed against the bed while Shigeru’s legs gave out from underneath him. Terror filled the teen as he sat up, only to yelp as sharp blinding pain erupted from his chest and branched out to every inch of his body.

When the pain finally subsided, he felt his face resting against familiar warm fur, making him calm down a bit. 

“Stay still, idiot,” Nyanko scolded. “Do you want to rip your stitches out and worsen those fractures? They’re fine!” Natsume looked past the fur and saw Hinoe holding Shigeru up, having caught him before he fell. 

“Sorry Natsume, we’ll give you a warning next time,” Hinoe sighed as she gently helped Shigeru into a chair, for once not cringing in disgust having to hold a man. 

“Wh-what?” He stuttered, looking down at Touko who was hard to see past Sensei’s snout. 

“They put them to sleep so we can talk,” Natori explained as he carefully went to his bedside. “Do you need help leaning back?” He reached forward a bit, making Natsume tense. The exorcist stopped, but didn’t let his hands retreat. “You could hurt yourself if you fall back.”

He was right, besides this was Natori, he wasn’t going to hurt him. 

Taking another deep breath, he nodded. “S-sorry,” he mumbled to both of them, not meeting their gaze again. 

“Don’t be, there’s nothing to be sorry for,” Natori reassured as he very slowly helped Natsume lean back. He hated how much the other tensed and wanted nothing more than to hurt the ones who did this to him. “What did you want to talk about?” He asked, careful not to bump Touko. 

“I…” he bit his quivering bottom lip, furious at himself for hesitating a second time. It should be easier to tell Natori than his foster parents! “During… yeah, we escaped. We found help at a gas station, but a cop… shot the clerk that was helping us… and took us.” Natori’s eyes widened in pure horror, a look Natsume came to hate. “They’re everywhere… I think… they’re here too.” Natsume glanced over at the IV and medicine bag that was dripping into him, feeling even more tired and weak than before. He couldn’t even trust what was in the bag until he knew he could trust both the doctor and nurse. His ears were starting to ring again as he started feeling a little light headed.

“Natsume-”

“That’s not all,” he quickly interrupted, finding it harder to catch his breath. “There… were others. Toshiki, Satoshi… and a cursed god. They need our help. We… don’t have much time.” His head was starting to pound… and he was getting dizzy. 

Natori couldn’t help the way he stiffened, recalling what Matoba said he saw in a vision. “Natsume, I know you hate leaving people behind, but this is a job for the police-”

“Let me finish,” the teen interrupted once more, his breathing not evening out, much to his annoyance. “It’s complicated, but… the god tied my life with Satoshi’s. If he dies, so do I.”

The second curse - the one they couldn’t lift! Everyone in the whole room grew horrified, realizing what he meant. If they didn’t save this Satoshi kid, Natsume would die. 

“It’s… complicated. But it’s a train reaction,” Natsume stopped for a moment to catch his breath as his head throbbed even more. No one said anything, wanting to hear it all before interjecting. “If… Toshiki is killed, then Satoshi will die. But… when I was… rolling- no,” he brought a trembling hand up to his head as his eyesight cut in and out, the ringing slowly coming back. He couldn’t let whatever this was claim him, not yet! “Before I was rolling out of the car, I heard them talk. We were both in the van… and they said there was a countdown… to the body. I don’t… know what he meant, but... I’ve been… having these dreams-” his hand fell to his side as his eyes closed. 

Natori’s eyes widened in fear as he quickly reached for the button, but Natsume gently rest a hand against his, stopping him. “Water, at a beach… slowly getting higher against me. That’s… the only clue… I have.”

“He wasn’t like this earlier,” Sensei said as his eyes narrowed in on the IV stand, obviously finding it suspicious. “The nurse changed it before you got here. He was fine and more awake until then, but that nurse didn’t seem to want you here either.” Shit, that only confirmed Natsume’s statement then. 

“Take… me,” Natsume mumbled, hardly coherent against the bed, his eyes staring blankly at him. “Please… I… need to… find… give back-” Natsume’s eyes rolled up into the back of his head as his arms and legs started twitching a bit. The exorcist’s eyes widened in terror as he pushed the emergency button.

Faster than ever, the doctor and nurse came in through the door, the doctor seeming to grow even more concerned upon seeing Natsume flailing slightly. “He’s having a seizure,” he said, surprised. “There’s nothing to do but wait it out. I’ll double check the MRI, but I didn’t see anything that would warrant a seizure.” The nurse handed him the Ipad with the scan on it, to which the doctor took it and started reexamining it.

Natsume’s arms and legs slowly stopped twitching after a few minutes as his breath started regulating again. Those golden eyes fluttered open and closed a few times, obviously confused. 

“Na...tori?”

The doctor handed the nurse the Ipad as he went to the bedside, taking out his flashlight again. “Don’t worry, he’s still here. Do you remember your name?”

“Takashi… Natsume,” he said as he languidly looked to Natori, trying to figure out how the doctor was suddenly back. “My birthday... is July first, and... I’m sixteen years old.”

The doctor let himself smile a bit at the answers. “Yes, very good. Your memory is still intact, but I’ll have to look at the original scan to see why you experienced a seizure.” He turned to the Fujiwaras, though frowned upon seeing them asleep. “Okay, Shuuichi Natori, since you’re here press the button again if he has another seizure. I’ll be back after reexamining the MRI.”

“Will do,” he said, his eyes not leaving the nurse who stayed quiet the whole time. He waited until they left before going back to Natsume’s side again, the youkai all around them growing tense. 

“If there’s nothing on the MRI or anything weird in the IV, it might be a byproduct of the second curse,” Sensei announced with an annoyed tick in his voice. 

“It’ll be lifted after I save Toshiki,” Natsume said as if it wasn’t open for discussion, feeling exhaustion starting to overwhelm him. 

“After  _ you  _ save him? You’re not leaving this hospital unless it’s to another facility!” Sensei growled, the others glowering at Natsume for even hinting at that as well.

“We almost lost you,” Natori added, the intense stare enough to make Natsume look down at his lap uncomfortably. “Even after we found you you were possessed by a youkai none of us could sense or dispel on our own! Hinoe and Matoba had to help because a normal exorcism would’ve killed you!” His voice started getting louder and more tense, making Natsume bow his head forward a little more each time. “I know you want to help, but you need to stop and focus on yourself for once goddammit! Do you even know how injured you are? Did you know you’re still cursed?? None of us can break it without finding that damned youkai and who knows if it’s actually tying your life with that other kids!”

Natori was mad, but only because he cared about him. Despite the lecture, Natsume couldn’t help the warm smile that made its way to his face. “Thank you, Natori,” he said as he slowly looked up at him, confusing the adult greatly with his smile. “Being lectured reminds me that I have people who care about me, and that I have people I care about too. If roles were reversed, I’d be doing the same thing. But things are just a little more complicated than that…”

  
  


_ “Is this better?” The man’s gruff voice hissed as he tightened the ropes around Natsume's left wrist that bound him to a metal chair. Natsume languidly pulled and tugged, water dripping from his hair and onto his bleeding broken skin, but his struggles did nothing. _

_ “Yes, father,” Satoshi stoically said as he walked up to him. Natsume felt fear run through his veins yet refused to let it show as he merely looked up at him with a determined still soaking wet face. The boy dunked his head in water once or twice just a few minutes before, but apparently not the way Toma would’ve liked, so his tormentor switched gears. _

_ Taking out a cigarette, the man lit it and look a deep breath of it. “You still scared of thunderstorms?” Toma smirked darkly, making Natsume stiffen. How did he know that, and why was that relevant? “If it were raining we’d stick you out on top of the roof and see if lightning would find you, but since it’s clear weather we have the next best thing.” _

_ Satoshi pulled a remote from his pocket and pointed it at him. A deep uneasy feeling nearly made him want to tremble as his mind desperately raced. He was wet, confined to a metal chair, and Toma mentioned thunderstorms? _

_ Satoshi pressed the button, unleashing an intense burning sensation that vibrated throughout his entire body, completely paralyzing him. His insides felt like they had been set on fire only for it to be doused seconds after. A persistent deep ringing in his ears slowly came into existence as the blurry world very slowly started coming back into focus. He wanted to vomit, he wanted to pass out. Of course, none of those happened, no matter how badly he wanted unconsciousness to claim him. _

_ A rough hand grabbed his chin and forced him to look up, his eyes meeting Toma’s which were filled with sinister pleasure. “Still with us?” He asked as he inhaled some more of his cigarette, moving his face mere inches from Natsume’s before blowing the smoke out against him. The teen was forced to cough, the action literally sending stabbing pains from his chest to the rest of his sore and fried body. Toma chuckled almost against his skin, watching in glee as Natsume’s face finally contorted in pain as he swam between consciousness and unconsciousness. “Lightning is worse, you know.” Letting go of his face, Toma took a step back, handing the other teen the cigarette. “Put it with the others.” _

_ Natsume tried forcing his fading eyes more open, realizing it didn’t make much of a difference, he could hardly see past the black dots.  _

_ An intense heat pressed against his shoulder, forcing Natsume to let out a small cry. He tried to flinch away, but immense pain wracked his sore body, immobilizing him. It must be the cigarette, his mind supplied as Satoshi went back to his father’s side who was already smoking another one.  _

_ “You did a higher intensity than I thought, I’m proud!” His father gently nudged the other, as Satoshi merely looked down at the ground.  _

_ “Thank you, father,” he said, his voice still void of emotion.  _

_ “We’ll come back to him, let’s check on the other one.” _

_ He heard them leave, much to his relief. They were changing targets, meaning Toshiki was next. As horrifying as that was, he couldn’t help but feel slightly thankful. He finally got a break, even if he was swimming at the edge of unconsciousness.  _

_ As much as he wanted to sleep, he couldn’t. He had to try to escape, even if he felt as horrible as this. _

_ Taking a deep breath, he pulled on the rope again, surprisingly feeling it slightly loose. The rope felt charred, weakened by the electricity somehow.  _

_ Deciding not to question it, he pulled and pulled, slowly but surely finally pulling his wrist free. The sudden jolt made him bite back an intense hiss as his whole body reacted, feeling sharp needles nearly everywhere inside him.  _

_ The pain didn’t matter, he had a chance-! _

_ Clumsily he moved and undid all the ropes that bound him to the chair. Every movement was pure agony, yet worth it. _

_ Sluggishly he got to his feet and stumbled in a random direction. His world was turning and blurring together, but he didn’t let it stop him.  _

_ He could see something, it looked like a door-! _

_ An intense heat and energy came up from behind, violently pulling him back. With a loud thud he fell to the ground as fingers wrapped tightly around his sore and raw neck. Instinctively his arms moved and scratched at the wrists, finding them very hot to the touch. His eyes finally focused on the blurry form on top of him, seeing a dirty and chipped off white oval mask covering the attacker’s face as long black hair tickled his skin. The robes were a dark brown color, completely covered and caked with both dirt and mud, making him wonder if it was originally a bright red at some point. There was also some dirty gold on his clothes and what looked like a rope tied around the top of it’s head and mask, but it was so hard to make out with his blurring vision.  _

_ This was the youkai that rushed up from behind back in the forest - this was the youkai responsible for his capture. It even had that same oozing evil aura that made it hard to breath. _

_ “Who… are you?” Natsume somehow managed out between grunts, the hold around his neck tightening, forcing him to squeak. _

_ “No one,” the youkai said as it leaned further down, their faces closer than before. The poison it gave off started filling Natsume’s nose, making him want to cough. His face was starting to turn pale blue, his consciousness swimming even more. “No one…” the hold around his neck slowly loosened, allowing the human to choke and sputter. He prepared to feel the poison send needles down his throat, but it didn’t happen. In fact, he couldn’t even feel it in his nostrils anymore despite the fact that the hands were still around his neck.  _

_ Slowly he opened his eyes again, seeing the youkai still on him. Now that his eyes could focus a bit, he saw the oval mask was chipped in multiple places, one of them being at his right light blue eye that held a very small speck of dark red in it.  _

_ “I’m sorry…” the youkai whispered next, those hands slowly moving away from his neck. “I’m so sorry, grandson of Reiko, but I can’t let you go.” Natsume felt his eyes widen in complete shock, the horror slowly seeping into curiosity. How did such a dark youkai know his grandmother? “When I learned who their next target was, I tried to resist, I tried to interfere as little as possible, but it kept tightening. I can’t die, not yet.” _

_ “Die?” Natsume weakly mumbled as so many questions flooded him, his eyes slowly moving to the rope around its head. It looked very similar to the one that had bound Hiiragi; he must’ve been cursed just as she had, which meant he was being forced to do this. _

_ “How-” _

_ “There’s no time,” the youkai said, looking up past Natsume, back to where he had been tied. “But maybe… maybe you can help him - maybe you can help  _ us _.” Slowly the youkai leaned forward, that poison seeping into his nose again, making him feel weak. It was more intense than before; was he doing this on purpose? “I can’t help you, but will you listen to my story when we have more time?” _

  
  


Natsume took a deep breath, shaking the memory away. “Shirudo used to be a normal youkai that settled in a mountain to the west, however his ability to mask presences in every way became a refuge for both humans and youkai alike who were being hunted down. All leads became dead ends, even scents animals picked up were lost. Once you’re under his protection, no one can track you down. His followers built shrines and worshiped him for decades, making him into a god. As time went on, more and more people became interested in his power. It wasn’t long until greedy humans found their way to the mountain and used his power to get away with horrific crimes. Shirudo grew furious and tracked them down, but the humans were ready. They hired exorcists who then bound him to a single family and cursed him. If he didn’t make sure the family succeeded, a rope around it's head would him.” 

It went unsaid, but everyone was thinking the same thing. Humans not only took the god from his pedestal and made him lose his status, but they also forced him to do the antithesis of his beliefs. Instead of protecting innocent people, he was forced to mask the Yakuza scum as they hurt and killed thousands of innocent people. There was no doubt that he became a tainted deity; the curses on Natsume were a testament to his power. 

“That explains why I couldn't pick up your scent,” Sensei growled, horribly annoyed. 

Natsume gave an apologetic smile to his bodyguard, feeling bad for putting everyone through this. “We only have until the next full moon to save him. Our captor, Toma forced Satoshi to come up with a way to kill Toshiki, but he came up with a way that would give him some time to be found. In the visions, I sometimes become him. He’s in a cave on a beach, but I’m not sure which one.”

No one said anything, mostly because they weren’t sure what to say. Without being able to track the kid down, how would they find him? There were several beaches and even more caves. Searching them all would take too long. Even without the deity’s power, it would be nearly impossible for police to find the child in time. This was something only they could do. 

“Despite your curse, you’re not going,” Natori said, his hair covering his face in shadows. “That god knew what state you were in, tying your life to Satoshi’s was just a sure way to make sure you died-”

“That’s not true-”

“You can’t even sit up!!” Natori snapped, making Natsume jump and shrink back into his bed. The exorcist immediately took a step back, feeling horrible for making Natsume scared. 

“He’s right,” Sensei said, for once agreeing with Natori. “You always try to do things alone, but you have all of us.”

“He’s also right,” Hinoe said, sounding peeved as well. “We’ll have everyone regroup and search for Toshiki instead. It’ll be a lot easier considering we know some general areas.”

Natsume couldn’t help but blink, a little confused as he still didn’t meet anyone’s gaze. “Everyone?”

Sensei let out an annoyed grunt. “Once everyone learned you were found, they tried making their way here. The Dog’s Circle, Kai, that fox child, Benio - jeez, too many to even mention! Half of them stayed outside standing guard.”

Natsume couldn’t help it as he brought a hand up to his heart, feeling it teeming with more warmth. Even Kai and the little fox? He didn’t want to bother them with this, and he didn’t want to put their lives at risk, but for now he nodded, far too exhausted to argue with them anymore. 

“Rest,” Sensei said as he gently used his snout to make sure Natsume was leaning all the way back. “You’re starting to stare again, don’t get another seizure.”

Natsume didn’t even realize he was blankly staring as he looked to Natori, who nodded. “Sorry for yelling. I’ll work with the Fujiwaras to see what we can do about keeping the Yakuza away.”

Natsume thought for a moment as he felt his eyelids grow even heavier. “The detectives… they seemed okay,” Natsume whispered as he closed his eyes, feeling himself slipping. 

“Detectives?”

“The ones that first came to us,” Nyanko Sensei clarified, though his voice grew faint.

“Thank you… everyone…” yet even as Natsume drifted to sleep, he knew it wouldn’t work. There was another part to this he forget to tell them, but since Natori was there, forgetting was probably for the best. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to thank everyone for their kind comments and support, you have no idea how happy it makes me knowing you guys are enjoying this as much as I am! Thank you! =D


	6. Temporary Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I couldn't upload for a bit! The holidays were crazy and I ran into some personal problems x.x Thank you Kanamizaki for being very kind and editing this chapter for me~! Trigger warnings for this chapter: suicidal thoughts, guns, and someone being shot

“Thank you for seeing me on such short notice,” Matoba bowed to his most secretive business partner, his black tie dangling annoyingly away from his body. He couldn’t find himself to care much though. They were lucky he put his black suit on in the first place.

“Of course, anything for the head of the Matoba clan,” the Onabyn, who was the leader of the Yakuza said with a welcoming smile as the two bodyguards on each side of him returned the bow. Last time Matoba saw them, he exorcised two very dark youkai that someone deliberately attached to them; it seems they were still grateful. “What can I do for you, Seiji Matoba?”

“I don’t have a lot of time, so I’ll get to the point,” he said, not sitting down as another guard pulled a chair out for him. “A very powerful ally of mine is being targeted by someone in your group. I need those orders cancelled immediately.”

The boss’s eyes widened in both shock and fear, though Matoba wasn’t sure what the man feared more: the fact that they targeted someone very important to him or the fact that he had to cancel an order because someone outside the Yakuza was demanding him to. 

“I-I see, I’m afraid some orders are harder to cancel than others,” the boss carefully said, obviously trying really hard not to upset him. It was kind of amusing to watch him battle against pride and fear as they both knew there was only one right answer. “What’s this ally’s name?” 

“Takashi Natsume,” Matoba said as another bodyguard brought a small computer over. The boss wasted no time typing the name in, his eyes filling with confusion.

“You said Takashi Natsume, right?”

“Yes,” he said, disappointed that the boss wasn’t smart enough to put the pieces together. Someone was only useful and worth saving if they had value, which was something they liked to discuss at length. If he considered Natsume to be worth saving, then he should’ve realized the child probably saw youkai too. It seemed like the Boss’s pride was winning over reason. Maybe a threatening push would bring him back to his senses. “His uncle Teppei Hojo is the one who hired someone to kidnap, torture, and murder him. Thankfully for you, he survived unless we wouldn’t be having this conversation.”

The boss grew pale at the threat as he gulped nervously, seeming to catch himself. “I agree. If we had known he was such an important ally to you, we would’ve never approved the mission in the first place. I’m terribly sorry for the mix up. As things stand, I see new orders for his nurse to keep him sedated with meds until the therapist and officer gets there to hand him back over to the Disposal Team. But these orders… they’re nearly a day old. The officer and therapist may have gotten to him already.” Matoba’s eye narrowed, his whole demeanor instantly darkening. 

“Then call and order them to stop immediately. I will not tolerate this mission progressing any further.”

“Y-yes, of course,” the boss fumbled for his phone, his bodyguards nervously looking at each other, not sure what to do. Against someone like Matoba, who could see and control what couldn’t be seen, they didn’t stand a chance. “Dammit!” The boss cursed as the call went to voicemail, not even bothering to leave one as he redialed. Matoba frowned, having a feeling they wouldn’t answer. “Dammit, pick up the damned phone!” 

“Is the Disposal Team the ones that originally took Natsume?” He asked, to which the Boss nodded, trying to get a hold of another person. “Where do they conduct their business? I’ll personally go down there and pick Natsume up myself.” There was no way those youkai would let someone take Natsume, but the Boss didn’t need to know that. However, he was very interested in the youkai he saw in the vision. He could kill two birds with one stone by visiting the person who was ordered to ‘take care’ of Natsume. 

The Boss grew a bit pale as he diverted his attention back to the computer. “It’s… complicated,” he hesitantly said. “We have the address, and know the general area, but no one’s ever been able to actually find the place. Usually we have to meet up somewhere in town or at one of our villas.”

They had a hard time finding them? For some reason he had a sinking feeling it had something to do with the youkai. That powerful cat of Natsumes would’ve found him within a day, yet he didn’t. There had to be a good reason behind that. 

“Give me the information anyway. If I can’t find it I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.”

\----

It’s quiet, he realized as he felt himself stirring again. It hasn’t been this quiet in a while, it was honestly a bit unnerving. Nothing could’ve happened though, not with everyone watching over him. 

“Oh, he’s waking up,” he heard a nearly foreign voice comment, making him stiffen. Who was this, and why was he in his room? 

“My my, he was only asleep for three hours this time. Hopefully you guys can ease his mind so he can fully rest again.” Touko said, convincing him to slowly open his eyes. Like the past few times, the lights were dimmed as he saw Touko still standing at his bedside as Detective Oishi and Investigator Akasaka stood at the foot of his bed. Upon seeing his gaze the two smiled warmly, though there was an overwhelming sadness and guilt in their eyes. 

“How are you feeling?” Detective Oishi asked, Touko smiling at him happily. Natsume couldn’t help the happiness that swelled in his chest. They listened to him - of course they'd listen to him. 

“Okay,” he quietly said, his eyes drifting to Nyanko Sensei who was still in his true form with his eyes closed. Somehow Natsume knew he wasn’t sleeping, which made him feel safer. As long as Sensei was there, he knew everything would be okay.

“Good, then Mrs Touko, we’ll call you back in once we finish,” Detective Oishi said, to which she nodded. 

“We’ll be right outside, Takashi,” she reassured as she squeezed his hand, unable to hide the worry in her tired brown eyes. 

“Thank you,” he said, feeling a bit sad as she let go of his hand. 

When she closed the door behind her, the two moved to where she had been before, their faces growing a bit grim. “We want to be frank with you, especially after everything you’ve been through,” Oishi started, making Natsume gulp a bit nervously. “Protocol wasn’t followed at all. Typically you’re questioned before you’re introduced to a lot of outside people, even your family members to ensure no one influences your statement. Your coma made things a bit difficult, but even so, once you were awake, they should’ve cleared everyone out until the officer on duty was available to take your statement. However, the officers assigned to you never took a statement and, from what I’ve heard, weren’t really here at all. After doing some digging, we learned they were part of the Yakuza.” Natsume felt his heart stop as he clenched the bedsheets, fear coursing through him. Those guards had been members of the Yakuza the whole time??

_ Lightning lit up the sky as thunder shook the ground. Natsume felt his eyes widen in terror as his whole body locked up, letting his bare swollen feet sink in the runny mud. A loud squeak to his right snapped him back into reality as a weight pulled on his right hand, nearly knocking him off balance. His eyes quickly focused on the small child who was nearly as horribly beat as he was.  _

_ “A-are you okay?” His shaky voice managed to ask. The child opened his mouth, thunder echoing with his lips. Natsume felt his heart quicken, his own lips trembling with his soaked and bloody body.  _

‘Lightning is worse, you know.’

_ No - he couldn’t freeze up here, not when this child’s life was literally in his hands. The chances of lightning hitting him while down on the ground was significantly less than when he was on Sensei’s back. Someone in his situation had to be truly cursed to incur such wrath.  _

_ “I-I’m fine,” the boy whimpered back, those dark brown eyes looking into his with worry. “Are you?” _

_ Natsume felt himself flinch at the question, his face contorting in shock. That was a genuine question from someone who spent the past day or so in hell with him. Any other typical kid would’ve focused on himself, but not Toshiki. _

_ “Yeah, sorry,” he said with a soft smile the rain easily smeared away. “Let’s go.”  _

_ Pulling his foot out of the mud, he took another step forward, his heart stopping upon hearing the child let out a short pained cry. Pivoting around, he saw Toshiki leaning on one foot as one of his small bruised arms reached down towards his ankle. _

_ The mud caked skin was turning slightly red and purple, indicating an injury. It was injured before, did he twist and hurt it again just now? Walking on it would only make it worse. If something happened to him, Toshiki needed to be able to escape.  _

_ “Stop,” he ordered, seeing the other try taking another step forward. Upon his command, Toshiki jumped, his cautious brown eyes staring into his own. That look of pure terror made Natsume sigh, knowing his own eyes probably held the same expression when he was caught off guard.  _

_ Kneeling to the ground, he turned so his back was facing the child. The purposeful knife wounds along his inner thighs were screaming at him, but he ignored it. They didn’t have a lot of time. They weren’t deep enough to make him bleed out. “Get on.” _

_ “Wh-what? No, I-I can walk!” _

_ “Don’t argue with me,” Natsume sternly said, the child instantly going silent. Guilt ran through him as he took a deep breath, trying to come up with a good medium between being protective and stern. “Sorry… we don’t have a lot of time, so let me carry you for now, okay?” _

_ Another clash of lightening and thunder made Natsume squeeze his eyes shut as his arms went stiff, his ears ringing and veins bursting with phantom pains. _

_ Small, gentle fingers against his shoulders pulled him from his shock, letting out a sigh of relief as the child wrapped his arms around his neck.  _

_ Right, the lightning wouldn’t touch them.  _

_ Carefully wrapping his arms around the child’s legs, he stood, ignoring the sharp and fiery pain shooting throughout his entire body. The wounds on his back were screaming at him at the top of their lungs, making him whisper a slight sorry as he trudged on.  _

_ Everytime he stepped on something sharp under the mud they nearly tumbled to the ground, especially when he stepped on a particularly sharp stick that pierced his skin. Stumbling against a tree trunk, he bit his bottom lip tightly, desperately hoping the sharp pain would subside soon.  _

_ A gentle tap on his shoulder made him follow Toshiki’s hand as he pointed at something that was surprisingly close. Squinting through the fog, his heart raced in both fear and excitement.  _

_ A gas station - it was a gas station! A tear of pure relief fell past his cheek as peeled himself from the tree, a bright hopeful smile singing on his lips. For once he didn’t fear being noticed by others, not when it mean the humans could protect them.  _

_ Pushing through the pain, he made his own path through the woods, his eyes never losing sight of the gas station that was dimly lit up alongside a dirt road. So many things impaled his feet, making him stumble here and there. But it was okay, because they were going to be okay. _

_ There was only one car in the area he assumed was the parking lot, but he didn’t let that dampen his hopes. Taking a deep breath, he looked in the window, a smile blossoming on his face. It was small sure, yet it radiated warmth. There were a lot of memories surrounding this place. Pushing the door open, both he and Toshiki shivered as a burst of cold air came over them, followed by warm air. The child couldn’t help the moan of relief as he relaxed a bit against him, making Natsume smile a bit.  _

_ “Welcome-” a young man stopped, a noise of distress leaving his throat. “A-are you guys okay?!” _

_ Natsume looked up, seeing a man who seemed to be in his early twenties with shaggy brown hair and light green eyes staring at them in shock behind the counter.  _

_ “We need help-” Natsume managed out, glancing over his shoulder, realizing he should stay away from the windows. “We were kidnapped, they’re probably after us.”  _

_ The man instantly grabbed a set of keys and hurried over to them. Natsume couldn’t help taking a few steps away as the man approached, a shadow of fear and doubt casting over his face. The man instantly slowed down, putting his hands up to show he meant no harm.  _

_ “I’m gonna show you guys to the back room in case they show up, okay? Follow me.” The man turned and went to the side of the store where there was a door with a sign reading ‘employees only.’ Natsume hesitated as he followed a few steps behind, not sure if he could trust the man as he unlocked the door. When it opened, it revealed a rather small cramped looking room with a sleeping bag on a rather small run-down couch. There were pizza boxes amongst others scattered around the messy room.  _

_ “Let me get you guys some bandages-” _

_ “Do you have a phone?” Natsume interrupted, the cramped room unnerving both him and the child. There was only a very small window above the couch barely big enough to fit a pizza box through. What if this man locked the door behind them and never let them out? _

_ The man blushed as he quickly fumbled through his many pockets. “Y-yeah, sorry one sec.” Finding it he let out a triumphant smile, instantly calling for help. “Get settled in, I’ll grab some bandages and medicine.” _

_ Natsume glanced back at the room, hearing the other start talking to someone on the phone. “Hey hi, I’m Ryuu Wisteria and I work at the Cube Stop Gas Station right off the high way - yeah, that one. A teen and kid just showed up in really bad condition. They say they were kidnapped.” Hearing he was indeed actually talking to someone, the injured teen reluctantly went into the room, his shaky legs threatening to give out at any moment.  _

_ “Imma set you down on the couch, okay?” He forewarned. When the little one nodded, he turned his back to the couch and let go of his feet. Seconds later Toshiki’s grip around his neck disappeared. In an instant his body practically hummed in response as his vision started fading in and out. Blinking a few times, he felt those small hands on his back, shaking him a bit, his voice soft, quiet, and worried. He didn’t even realize his legs gave out, nor that he fell against the makeshift couch. His head ached where it hit the side of the couch on the way down, along with one of his already sore ribs. His chest didn’t feel right as he gasped a few times, the wind seemingly knocked out of him.  _

_ “I’m fine,” he tried to reassure, though both knew it was a natural response at this point.  _

_ “Are you okay?” He heard the man from outside ask, his footsteps coming close to them, only to stop. “Oh wow, you guys work fast! I see an officer pulling up already," he said to the person on the phone. _

_ An officer already responded to the call? It almost seemed too good to be true. The highway must’ve been closer than they thought.  _

_ The door to the store opened just as the man’s tone of voice started to change as he pressed the phone closer to his face, seeming to grow uneasy. “Really? But his lights are flashing on his car and everything-” _

_ “I heard the situation from the radio,” another man’s voice said, making Natsume stiffen. Something wasn’t right, he could feel it in his gut.  _

_ “The other two are injured, no? Where are they?”  _

_ Natsume quietly stood, motioning for Toshiki to hid under one of the larger boxes in the room. The child looked uneasy, his terrified brown eyes seeking comfort and protection with him - both of which he knew he couldn’t provide.  _

_ “I-I’m sorry sir, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” the clerk said, as Natsume knelled at the corner of the doorway, seeing everything happen through a reflection on the ceiling. There was a police officer standing in front of the clerk with his hands on his hips, glowering at the man who seemed scared for his life.  _

_ “Are you serious? You’re on the phone with the station now!” He spat. “Hang up, the chief knows I’m here.” _

_ “He does?” Ryuu asked, lowering the phone slowly, as if not sure. “They ran into the forest just now. They didn’t trust me and thought I was working for their kidnappers.” _

_ The officer’s posture fell, those hands sliding off his hips. “Oh? What direction did they go?” _

_ “Up the road,” the clerk said, pointing in the opposite direction they came.  _

_ “Thank you for the valuable information,” the police officer said, Ryuu’s eyes widening in complete disbelief. Natsume felt his heart stop in his chest, hardly able to grasp what he was seeing. _

_ The officer had a gun pointed at the clerk’s head, the man that had been so thoughtful and protective moments ago. He barely even had a chance to take a deep breath as a shot rang out, red spraying in the reflection. _

_ He shot him - he shot him in the head. The haunting hollow sound of Ryuu’s body hitting the floor sucked the air from his lungs, his entire body feeling heavier than lead as hopelessness settled in. _

_ This was a police officer, they were supposed to be safe from their captures with him! Who could they turn to if they couldn’t trust the police?! _

_ “Wow, you two got a pretty good kid killed. I couldn’t even tell if he was telling the truth or not, and I’m usually really good at reading people.” The officer’s eyes met his own through the reflective surface on the ceiling, making him blanch. “Then I saw you at the corner of my eye. Now come out, before I put a bullet through one of your limbs.” _

_ Natsume’s said limbs were frozen in place, his mind still reeling in shock. This officer  _ just _ killed their hero, what would he do once he came out?! Wouldn’t he just shoot him too? _

_ “You have five seconds before I start shooting!!” _

_ His body acted on it’s own as he jumped up, the adrenaline dulling the pain that wracked his body. The officer smirked upon seeing the reaction, moving his hand so his golden eyes were staring down the barrel of the gun.  _

_ Never in his life did he ever think he’d be staring down the end of the barrel with a maniac ready to end his life with a simple flinch of a finger. He’s gone up against powerful dark youkai and gods yet nothing was scarier than this moment. Even if he did what he was told, would the man shoot him anyway? Wasn’t that how humans typically did things? _

_ “You’re turning blue, don’t forget to breath now,” the man laughed. “Now get over here before I run out of patience.” _

_ He didn’t have a choice. Unlike youkai he didn’t stand a chance against a human. His powerful punches were useless on humans, especially against someone who was no doubt trained in hand to hand combat. If he didn’t have so much to lose, he would’ve tried finding a way to fight back, but he couldn't throw his life away anymore, and he couldn’t risk getting Toshiki shot.  _

_ “Where’s the other kid?” The officer asked as he approached, Natsume’s stomach rolled as he gagged, the sight of the clerk being far too much, even for him. “Not that your trembling isn’t amusing, but the kid - where is he?!” _

_ Ryuu didn’t deserve this, that kind hearted soul deserved life. It wasn’t just fear that had him trembling, or the pain. Most of it was anger. “The storm separated us, I don’t know where he went.” The officer glowered at his harsh tone as he walked up and pressed the gun to his forehead, the cold metal a foreign sensation to him. This did feel familiar though, like the time Houzuki realized he was posing as Fuzuki to prevent the drought. His face resembled the same stoic expression he bore then, his fear gone. _

_ They stared at each other for what felt like forever before the officer clicked his tongue in annoyance, unable to get a read on him.  _

_ The door to the gas station opened, the officer peeling his gaze away as a smirk formed. “You’re fast, Toma.”  _

_ Toma - it couldn’t be-! Turning his head, he saw it was true, wanting to do more than scream in frustration. There was no escaping them, no matter what they tried. Not even the god could help him escape, his eyes catching sight of Shirudo whose eyes were closed and head hung low.  _

_ “I’m sorry, Takashi. I… have to reveal Toshiki too. You should tell them yourself, so… you don’t get hurt.” The rope was tightening around his head, he could see it at the corner of his eyes, only making him more frustrated.  _

_ If only he had the Book of Friends, he could cheat the god’s curse and call for help. _

_ “Please, Takashi. I don’t… want to see you get hurt anymore.”  _

_ No - he refused. They could do whatever they wanted to him as long as he knew he didn’t sell Toshiki out. A small smile that held both sorrow and pride came to the god’s face as he flicked his wrist. The box hiding the child suddenly moved, alerting the two adults. The gun was pulled from his face and pointed to the room.  _

_ Now he had no choice.  _

_ “Don’t shoot-” he said, clenching his fists. “It’s just Toshiki.” _

_ Toma turned to him with a deep fire burning in his eyes. He moved closer, a ripping pain across his chest making him yelp and gasp at the same time. His knees buckled, his hands instinctively going to his chest as he grew light headed. The world around him shifted back and forth as a warmth flooded over his arms.  _

_ It should hurt, but it didn’t. Even as he felt himself being dragged, he felt nothing but a deep coldness seep over him.  _

_ He blinked a few times, finding everything darker than before. His blurry vision saw a pair of panicked dark brown eyes staring into his own, his mind slowly registering that this was Toshiki. The child was being gagged, and he didn’t even fight. After what they both just witnessed, he couldn’t blame him. In fact he would’ve encouraged him to do as they said.  _

_ “You wanna dump the small one at a beach, right?” He faintly heard Toma ask, his head starting to swirl again. He heard Satoshi answer, but his words were muffled.  _

_ Sleep… he just wanted to sleep.  _

_ “I’m sorry, Natsume,” he heard the deity whisper in his ear. “If I hadn’t been so selfish, I could've ended my life, and saved yours. I’m sorry, grandson of Reiko.” Something wet fell on his brow, which he assumed was a tear from Shirudo. “The wound isn’t too deep, you’ll survive, but it’ll hurt. Since your life is tied to Satoshi, you won’t be able to die easily, not while he’s still healthy. He’ll keep you alive long enough for help to come. But… just in case someone doesn’t find you, I’ll put a second curse on you, one that’ll keep you asleep until you’re safe-” _

“Takashi?” Akasaka called, making Natsume blink the horrific memory from his mind. His hands were desperately clenching the sheets as Sensei breathed against him, his red eyes staring into his own. 

“You panicked, you’re fine,” Sensei gently nuzzled his hair, earning a confused sound from one of the detectives. All they could see was his hair being rustled by something that wasn’t there. 

“S-sorry, I-I guess... I panicked,” he admitted, slowly looking up at them. “But my friends, they’re in danger! Those officers saw everyone, they even had access to their names and addresses! They could’ve passed the information before they were caught!”

The detective and investigator frowned, knowing they couldn’t provide an answer that would settle his nerves. “If it helps, everyone on your guest list is here except for Shuuichi Natori who went home to get some rest. We’ll talk to the others to implement extra precautions, okay?” Fear still raged in his heart, but he was relieved that these two weren’t undermining him. “Let’s take your statement so you can focus on healing, okay?”

Taking a deep breath, he told them everything. He didn’t dare meet their eyes, he just stared at the sheets as he spoke with a slight tremble in his body and voice. They were recording him, thank gods. This way they wouldn’t make him repeat what he said. Sensei even remained strangely quiet, not saying a word as he finished. Recalling everything that happened made him feel both sick to his stomach and light headed. 

“Is there anything else you can remember?” Oishi asked, both seeming horribly unnerved after learning of Toshiki and Satoshi. 

“No, that’s everything,” he said, making sure to leave the details of the youkai out. The last thing he needed was for them to think some of the reports from his family members were true.

“And you’re sure they didn’t mention what beach they took Toshiki?”

“I’m positive,” he reaffirmed with a deep sigh, wishing he had more information to give them. “I… think he only as a day or two left.” They nodded, understanding the grave situation.

“I remember seeing the news talk about finding someone shot at a gas station, I think it was just outside Shiro Town.” Natsume’s eyes widened, his heart stopping in his chest. Shiro Town? Were they really that close to his parent’s old home and he didn’t even realize it? “We’ll get this to Chief Tsunemori right away. She’ll know the best way to go about this.” 

“Thank you,” Natsume said, frustrated with the fact that he was feeling tired again. He hated to accuse someone without evidence, but in his state it was impossible to gather any. “May I ask a favor?”

“Of course, what is it?”

“Well… I know I’m not in the best condition, but I’m so tired even after the nap. I know it could be my body trying to heal but… I don’t know, I only feel this way after the nurse comes in.” The two went silent as they glanced at each other, their expressions turning grim. Natsume felt a nervous bead of sweat start forming on the side of his face, knowing this couldn’t be good. 

“She came in around ten minutes before you woke up and changed the bags.” Oishi stepped forward and looked at the bags on the IV stand, his eyes squinting.

“Odd…” he trailed off as he took his phone out and snapped a picture. 

“Wh-what?” The teen nervously asked. 

“The label seems as if it was peeled off then put back on.” Very delicately he held his phone in one hand recording his other hand peel the sticker away. There was nothing underneath it though, which made them all nervous. “We’ll look into it,” he reassured, putting the label back on. “I know it’s hard, but don’t ask for pain medication until we sort this out.”

Natsume wanted to say he never even asked for it in the first place, but decided to leave that out. He’d have to try to convince the others that the pain was minimal and that he didn’t need medication right now. Not like it was a big deal considering he was planning on leaving tonight anyway.

“Change of plans. Akasaka, stay here with Takashi until the approved officers get here. I’ll get this over to the Chief.” Oishi ordered, to which the other nodded. Natsume couldn’t help but feel more at ease with the decision, smiling delicately up at the investigator.

“Thank you. I’m… sorry for inconveniencing both of you.”

“You’re not,” Akasaka smiled warmly. “This is our job.”

As soon as Oishi opened the door, he could hear everyone outside go silent. “We’re done, don’t harass him too much.”

Touko and Shigeru were the first ones in, followed by Nishumra, Kitamoto, Sasada, Shibata, Tanuma and then Taki. The fact that everyone was here aside from Natori completely blew him away, making him blush a little. 

“Natsume!!” They all collectively cried. Tears fell down Nishimura and Sasada’s cheeks despite their best efforts, making Natsume smile warmly at them. His foster parents stayed along the wall with Akasaka, speaking to him quietly as they gave him time with his friends. This was the first time he actually got to speak to them, even to Tanuma and Taki.

“What took you so long?! We’ve been waiting for you to wake up!” Nishimura cried, not even seeming bothered that he was shedding tears in front of Taki. He was sure he’d hear all about how embarrassed he felt later; in fact he was looking forward to his scolding. 

“Hey, we agreed we’d give him a break!” Sasada scolded. “How are you feeling Natsume?”

“Getting better,” he reassured. “I’m sorry to put you guys through all this.”

“Don’t start with that crap,” Shibata’s voice cut in, making Natsume look past his three normal friends to his old classmate, seeing him, Taki and Tanuma all carrying something colorful in their hands. His three normal friends turned, Sasada’s face turning red. 

“N-not now-!”

“Why not now?” Tanuma asked, meeting Natsume’s eyes with a warm relieved smile. 

“Natsume,” Taki said, making him slowly look at her as Nishimura and Kitamoto moved out of the way. A deep blush burned into Natsume’s face as he saw what they were holding, finding himself in disbelief. “Sasada came up with the idea to fold a thousand paper cranes, so we did, with everyone’s help.”

“I-I just came up with the idea. Everyone helped gather participants,” she blushed, looking away. 

“My father, Shigeru, Touko, Ponta, and even Miss Yorie made one,” Tanuma said. 

“I did too!” Shibata quickly shouted, which made Tanuma snort.

“There were even people who heard about what happened and wanted to make one for you. A lot of them said you helped them, so they wanted to return the favor,” Sasada explained as she tilted her head curiously. “You know a lot of people, Natsume. There were people of all ages! I had them write their names on the cranes because I couldn’t keep track.”

Natsume’s eyes widened in complete shock as Tanuma gently handed him one end of the paper cranes that were all stringed together. He didn’t even see half of them were still in a big box behind everyone. 

“I…” he trailed off, not even knowing what to say as he looked at the first paper crane, reading the names as he went down the line: 

_ Shigeru Fujiwara, Touko Fujiwara, Satoru Nishimura, Atsushi Kitamoto, Kaname Tanuma, Tanuma’s father, Jun Sasada, Akifumi Sugino, Shuuichi Natori, Tamiko, Tooru Taki, Katsumi Shibata, Chizu Sakanaka, Yuriko Ogata, Miyoko Aoi, Ito-san, Tsukiko Yousuke, Takuma Yousuke, Aoi, Kaoru Sonokawa, Beniko, Daisuke Yuki, Yorie Tsumura, Isamu Taki,  _ and many, many more names of his precious friends, and even kind hearted strangers who crafted these beautiful cranes for him. 

His hands trembled as tears trailed down his cheeks. So many people... most of them even lived somewhat far away, yet they traveled all the way here just to do this? How’d they even know he was hurt? Why would they use their time to make one and hand deliver it? They obviously couldn’t mail them without crushing them. 

“Sasada organized search parties after the police suggested it, so word of your disappearance spread,” Tanuma said, noticing Natsume’s beyond confused expression.

Always the observant one, Natsume sniffled as he looked to Sasada, finding it hard to believe she was able to keep it together to organize all this. “Thank you, Sasada. I… honestly don’t even know what to say.”

Leaving him speechless made her blush even deeper, but smile even wider. Small tears formed in her eyes as she beamed, trying not to lose herself to her emotions. “I’m the class president, I can’t have one of my classmates disappear, let alone a good friend.”

“She was sooo bossy!!” Nishimura groaned, making Kitamoto smirk. “We couldn’t even sneeze without her yelling at us to take it more seriously. But that’s the most serious I’ve ever been!! There’s just no pleasing her!”

“You should’ve seen him Natsume,” Kitamoto laughed, nudging Nishimura with his elbow as a teasing smirk surfaced. “You wouldn’t have recognized him.”

“H-hey! I can be serious about things!” Nishimura pouted, feeling attacked as everyone laughed, even Natsume. It was cut short when he started coughing, much to his embarrassment. It felt like a lifetime since the last time he laughed so hard, even if it only lasted a few seconds. 

“S-sorry, I’m fine,” he quickly reassured with that fake smile. Tanuma seemed to notice it as he frowned, looking worried. 

Taki quickly grabbed a plastic cup and let Tanuma fill it with water the staff left for them, holding it out to him. “You should drink some water. Do you need help?” She asked kindly, making Natsume blush. His friends were doing so much for him… how could he ever repay everyone for their kindness?

“I think I got it,” he reassured, not wanting them to yell at him if his wrist did give out. Very carefully he moved his hand up and took the water, surprised that the effort didn’t hurt much. Not too long ago he could barely move his hand from the bed. Was this due to Sensei sleeping next to him? He’d have to thank him for lending him some of his power. 

“Oh yeah, we have a bone to pick with you Natsume!” Nishimura pouted, making everyone look to him confused. Natsume unwillingly tensed, hoping it had nothing to do with his kidnapping. “Why didn’t you tell us you knew Shuuichi Natori?! He’s our favorite actor!!”

Natsume let out the breath he was holding, unable to help but genuinely smile. “When I first met him, I honestly didn’t know who he was, so we were able to talk to each other without the fame barrier.” He had practiced the answer when Natori started visiting him more often just in case one of his friends saw them together. “I felt like telling you guys who love him as an actor would be betraying him, so I didn’t.” Speaking of Natori, he knew the other didn’t go home. He probably set off to search for Toshiki and the deity, god, youkai - whatever his status technically was. Hinoe, Chobihige, the Middle Ranks, Kappa, Benio, and Misuzu were gone too. Much to Natori’s displeasure, some probably all accompanied him while others raced them there. For some reason, he was sad he didn’t get to see that. 

“I guess that makes sense,” Nishimura pouted, trying to be mature with the answer as Natsume’s eyes fell a little, his body suddenly feeling very light. He smelled the ocean again, but also blood.  _ ‘Hurry… please…’ _ Sensei opened one of his eyes, snapping Natsume out of his thoughts. For a moment he felt disoriented, almost forgetting where he was.

“Need to rest?” Sensei asked, to which he merely shook his head slightly, grateful for his bodyguard’s cautious watchful gaze. 

“Natsume?” Shibata’s voice came next, much to Natsume’s surprise. The other was strangely quiet, probably feeling a bit uncomfortable knowing he couldn’t say anything about youkai in front of the other three. He’d have to thank him for his understanding later. 

“I’m fine,” he reassured, though his smile didn’t reach his eyes this time. When he  _ ‘disappeared’  _ again, he realized he’d cause them even more emotional distress. Sasada did so much to bring people together just for him, he hoped he’d be back before she could waste anymore of her time.

“You’re not going,” Sensei growled, somehow hearing his thoughts. Natsume merely smiled more, deciding to stay silent. 

They’d argue about this later.

“Did you guys bring a game? I’d like to watch you play,” Natsume suggested, hoping to lighten the mood a bit. A hand gently wrapped around his own, making him go stiff. 

“You’re shaking,” Tanuma whispered as the others cheered and started fighting over what game to play. Natsume looked down at his hand to see Tanuma holding his, allowing the water in the cup to stop spilling from the sides. “Are you really okay?” 

“Yeah,” he said, though let his eyes fall. He was lying again… he didn’t have to lie to Tanuma. “Actually, not really. It’s something I can’t involve you guys with.” Taki and Shibata leaned closer, ignoring the others who were still arguing over which game would be the funnest for Natsume to watch. 

“You’re hurt, Natsume,” Tanuma glowered, gently squeezing his hand as if protectively calling him an absolute idiot. “Whatever’s going on, you don’t have to do it alone. You  _ can’t  _ do it alone, not this time.” The other two nodded, looking at him with intense determination. 

“I know,” Natsume reassured, giving Tanuma a genuine thankful smile. They deserved to know the truth. “There’s a curse only I can lift, but I only have a day or two before it kills me.” 

“Wh-what!?” Shibata quietly choked as the others went pale. They knew there was another curse, Natori explained it could be draining his life force away. 

“I have to find the youkai that’s bound to the family that kidnapped me, and no one but me can find it.”  
  
“Are you sure?” Tanuma asked, a nervous bead of sweat forming on the side of his face. “What about Sensei or Natori, or even the other youkai that were here earlier?”

Natsume shook his head, hating the look of fear on their faces. “The youkai can’t be found when you deliberately search for it, just as the people who are in it’s sphere of influence can’t be found.”

“Which means… the other kids won’t be found,” Taki said, going even more pale. “Natsume, you can’t go back-”

“It’s the only way,” he said, feeling Tanuma clench his hand even tighter. “The curse allows me to find them. If one of them dies before I find them, then I die. So… I don’t have a choice.”

Nyanko Sensei stood angrily, bringing his face close to his own. “You are  _ not _ going anywhere, and you are  _ not _ going to die. Leave it to the others, you need to focus on healing.”

“Sensei-” he stopped though, facing his friend’s horribly pale faces so the others didn't see him talking to thin air. “I have to return their name, Sensei. You know that I’m the only one that can.”

“Return their name?” Tanuma asked, to which Natsume shook his head, not wanting to explain it. 

“If I disappear again, just know I’ll be back.”

“How can you be sure you’ll come back!?” Shibata lectured, wanting to slap some sense into Natsume despite knowing it was impossible to avoid the situation. 

“Because I have a lot of friends helping me right now,” he reassured. “And Sensei will be with me too.” This time Nyanko Sensei didn’t say anything, seeming almost caught off guard by the information. He was thankful when the others finally came back, Sasada holding Uno in her hands. 

“We figured a card game would be easier since the others are board games,” she informed before tilting her head, noticing their pale faces. “What’s with you three? You look really pale!”

“J-just haven’t gotten enough sleep,” Taki quickly reassured. She didn’t seem to fully convince the class president, but she decided not to comment on it. 

“I shuffled these last time, so everyone get seven cards!”

Tanuma slowly removed his hand from Natsume’s as he took the half empty cup from his hand and set it on the side table. “Be safe, and… let us know if we can do anything,” he whispered as he was handed some cards. 

Natsume felt horrible for scaring them like this, but it was better than just disappearing again. Shibata kept glancing back at him, unsure about it, but he was sure Tanuma and Taki would reassure him everything would be fine.

Because it would be. He had too many people he cared about to carelessly throw his life away.

They didn’t even finish the first round before he was out, hoping he wouldn’t sleep too long. 

\----

_ “Do it!!” Toma’s voice aggressively hissed at Satoshi as he slammed his hand against the wooden table, making the trembling teen jump. “Do it or I’ll do it to you!” _

_ Natsume’s head lulled to the side as he watched Satoshi stare at his bleeding strapped hand in terror. It was locked in a device that removed fingernails. Just moments ago, his father ripped one of them off, the pain temporarily blinding him. He couldn’t help the way his own body trembled, though his dulled golden eyes focused on the other teen. He was shaking and whimpering with a look of absolute horror in his eyes. Those eyes didn’t belong to a killer, let alone someone who loved to hurt others. These were the eyes of a scared lonely boy who was backed against a wall with no way out. If he didn’t do this, Toma would give the child a whole new meaning to hell.  _

_ “Do it,” Natsume managed out, surprising both his captures. “I… can take it. Do it.” _

_ Toma let out a demonic sounding laugh, looking to his son then to him. “Isn’t that Noble of you,” he smirked, roughly grabbing his chin and forcing Natsume to look at him again. “But foolish. If you want pain, we’ll give you pain. Do it now, Satoshi. Show this trash how naive his bravery is.” _

_ Natsume glanced over to Satoshi, their eyes meeting even for a fleeting moment as his chin was yanked harder, forcing him to look back at the father.  _

_ “Do it!!” _

_ With a choked cry the trembling teen slammed his hand down on the lever, the blinding pain coming back, being even worse than before. This time it felt like something was impaling his finger, forcing his stern determined face to waver. A faint ringing came to his ears as he felt the hand leave his chin, Toma’s mocking laugh making him feel sick to his stomach.  _

_ “You need more strength to remove the whole nail at once. Try again!” Natsume desperately wanted to shake his head no, the pain so overwhelming he almost did. The image of that boy’s terrified face came back to him, forcing him to take a deep breath.  _

_ He could do this. Pain was only temporary. He’d slip away eventually.  _

_ Satoshi rose his hand again, earning a cheer from Toma as the blinding pain shot through his arm and down his spine, the world finally fading to black.  _

_ “...-son… grandson, are you awake?” A faint voice gently called, hardly audible above the fiery pain he felt in nearly every nerve in his trembling body and agonizing throbbing in his left hand. “Please wake up, we don’t have a lot of time before they come back!” This voice… ah, it was the youkai, wasn’t it? He could sense it even with his eyes closed, but it’s poisonous aura from earlier was gone. The difference reminded him of the guardians Gen, who was at the cusp of becoming an evil spirit, and Sui, who had been fully corrupted.  _

_ Very slowly he opened his eyes, seeing the dirty white mask with a rope around it’s head and the lone red dotted blue eye staring into his own. Relief instantly flooded through the youkai as he let out a sigh. “Thank goodness I thought… well, it doesn't matter what I thought. You don’t have to speak, I know you’re in pain but please just… listen. We don’t have a lot of time.” His voice grew shaky, as if tears were close to the surface.  _

_ Despite wanting to say he didn’t have much of a choice considering he was tied up, Natsume didn’t. There was a desperation in the youkai’s trembling voice, one he couldn’t deny.  _

_ “I was born from a shield created by a powerful and talented craftsman who wanted nothing more than to protect his family during one of the wars. However, it was one of his family members that turned on him, the shield - and me - being unable to do anything as he was betrayed. Grieving over the loss of my master, I gathered what energy I could and fled. I wanted to find a place without humans and war - I wanted to find a place of peace. During my journey, I encountered many different humans, ones with kind hearts, some corrupted, and others in between. Each human I observed slowly restored my faith, and over time I learned that whoever I was with became encased in a protective aura, one that made it impossible for others to find them. As I traveled, humans were drawn to me, as if feeling my protective shield. Youkai started following shortly after, until we found the perfect haven together in a beautiful, lush mountain.” The youkai sighed, his gaze seeming far away and clouded now. “The more people that gathered, the more they worshipped me, the stronger I became. Soon I was strong enough to extend my shield over the entire mountain, allowing those who sought safety a place to call home.” _

_ “There were festivals, so many festivals and parties. There was no violence, just happiness. Youkai helped the humans even though they couldn’t see them, and the humans, in return, gave offerings. It was peaceful times... so… peaceful.” His one eye closed as his posture fell. “Then… someone found us by accident. They weren’t looking for me or anyone else, they just stumbled upon us. When they learned of my power…” _

_ An exorcist, Natsume sadly realized. Of course humans couldn’t leave such a rare and beautiful utopia alone. _

_ “He cheated the system. Knowing he’d probably never find this place again, he had the local messenger send for his friends, not telling them why he asked for them to come urgently. Since his friends held no malice against him or anyone else in my protective sphere, they were able to find us. Shortly after that, chaos broke out. The exorcists sealed away all the youkai in our home as they put a cursed rope around me that bound me to their leader’s family.” Natusme’s eyes drifted to the rope, realizing this youkai really was just like Hiiragi. “If I don’t make sure they succeed, the rope will tighten around my head until it completely crushes me, which is why I couldn’t let you escape earlier.” The teen felt himself tremble a bit in fear, finally becoming aware of the situation he was in. Not only would he have to escape from that man and son, but he also had to escape from this youkai too. Unlike the others, the youkai would hate every second of it.  _

_ “So, you want me to free you?” He managed out, his voice scratchy and hoarse, but he didn’t care, not after learning how much this youkai suffered. If that utopia still existed today, he wondered how those people would react to those who could see them. “Your home… sounds like a paradise.” _

_ “It was,” the youkai sighed, his blue and red eye meeting his warm golden ones again. “But my request is more complicated than that.” _

_ “Huh?” He asked, wanting to tilt his head a bit to the side, but didn’t dare risk it.  _

_ “Satoshi, Toma’s son… I want you to free him.” Natsume’s eyes widened, recalling how he froze up and silently begged his father not to make him hurt him.  _

_ “Toma wanted his son to learn all about the family business so he can become the next heir after turning fifteen, but his wife quickly found out what he did for a living and tried to flee with Satoshi. In his rage, my master killed her and dragged his son back, literally beating the teachings into him.” _

_ As sad as the story was, Natsume wasn’t sure how this story made the youkai want to protect Satoshi, especially after becoming a tainted deity. As much as he wanted to keep the peace back then, the corruption should’ve blinded him to nearly anyone in plight. There had to be more to this story.  _

_ As if sensing his confusion, the youkai continued. “My master’s actions only made my hatred towards humans to grow, that is, until one day, a terrible thunderstorm rolled in. Satoshi was sitting on the back patio, staring blankly at a tree with an intense desire to die as he clenched a rope in his hands. I was drawn to his negative thoughts and feelings, and sat down on the patio next to him. To my surprise, the child jumped, but didn’t do anything else but stare. Even if I meant to harm him, he wanted harm to be done to him: _

_ “It’s alluring, isn’t it?” I asked, hiding my trembling voice. It was the first time a human actually looked me right in the eyes. I saw my corpse in the reflection of his hazel eyes that held little to no light in them. Just like me, he had been torn away from his happy life and forced into one where light no longer reflected in his eyes. I couldn’t help but feel a small desire to help the child since I couldn’t help myself.  _

_ “What?” The child asked, his voice sounding so fragile. _

_ “Ending it all,” I repeated, glancing back to the tree.  _

_ “Oh,” the child responded meekly, becoming stiff beside me. It was obvious he was uncomfortable with the fact that I could read his desires, but it didn’t seem to bother him too much as he pulled his horribly bruised and wounded legs to his chest. “Yeah… it is.” _

_ He didn’t ask who I was or even questioned why I was there. He merely accepted me into his reality, the reality he didn’t want to be apart of anymore. Despite being thrilled that he could see me, part of me grew sad. This human was only a child, yet he already desired eternal rest. There was still so much he hadn’t experienced yet. Was it really okay for me to encourage a child of man to end it all when he had barely lived at all? _

_ That’s when I realized something. Even if the child tried to run away to start over somewhere,  _ **_I_ ** _ would be forced to stop him from escaping. But would that really be so bad? While he ran free, I’d do nothing but feel the rope bring me long awaited peace.  _

_ “I… don’t necessarily want to die,” the child suddenly said, surprising me. “I want to live, I-I want to be loved and cared for. I’m sick of hurting people, I’m sick of being pushed to kill. I want to create life, not take it! But... it’s useless. My father’s friends are powerful - they’re everywhere. I wouldn’t last a day without them finding me. I’d be dragged back and severely punished.” He hugged himself tighter, burying his face into his legs. “At least in death, I won’t have to hurt others, and he can’t hurt me.” _

_ They were mirrors of each other, Natsume realized. Except one was human, and the other was a youkai. Their similarities combined with the storm probably set the perfect conditions that let them meet.  _

_ “After that, whenever a storm rolled in, we met on the porch, free to speak our minds. We learned about each other, and learned of our desires. But lately, Satoshi hasn’t talked about his dreams. He hasn’t really spoken at all. When I gathered the courage to ask him what was wrong, he said he had given up on his dreams and looked forward to eternal nothingness: ‘It’s the only thing I can control in my life.” The youkai took deep shaky breath before continuing.  _ _ “Grandson of Reiko, I cannot help him, nor can I help you. But you can help each other. I know it’s wrong and cruel of me, especially after the hope Reiko gave me, but I refuse to let an innocent human soul end up like me.” _

_ Natsume didn’t even get a chance to ask what he meant as he felt a darkness press against him, merging with his body. His eyes rolled into the back of his head as a pressure settled over every inch of his body.  _

_ “I bound your life to Satoshi’s. If he dies, you die, and vise versa.” Natsume’s eyes snapped back open in fear, looking at the youkai in anger.  _

_ “As much as I want to help, I’m just a human child, there’s nothing I can really do-” _

_ “There is,” he said, the youkai’s one eye looking off to the side. Natsume couldn’t help but follow his gaze and froze in horror. Staring at them was Satoshi, but it was obvious he didn’t see the youkai.  _

_ “If you return my name, I will gain enough power to break the curse. After that, no one will have trouble tracking them down. If you lead the police to the general area, their dogs will pick up the scent of dead bodies and come running. But you have to do it before Satoshi loses his will to live. If he’s forced to kill Toshiki, or you for that matter, it’ll be the end of him.” _

_ “Wh-who are you talking to?” Satoshi asked, his voice sounding so shaky and vulnerable. Natsume couldn’t help but glance over at him, offering a warm smile. It was hard, especially since the other tormented him, yet his body acted on its own.  _

_ “Someone who’s very worried about you,” he said softly. “Someone who wants to see you free-” _

_ “Natsume-” Shirudo’s voice interrupted the dream, the images slowly rippling away. “We’re out of time you have to hurry-!!” _

Natsume jolted awake, feeling his heart nearly thudding out of his chest. He was sweating, but he wasn’t hot. 

_ ‘Killer… I’m a killer!’ _ Satoshi’s thoughts rang as a sharp pain shot through his head. 

Satoshi was hurting himself, he was starting to lose it already-!

“Sensei,” he cried, seeing his bodyguard already hovering over him. Had he been there the whole time?

“I know,” he said with a defeated tone, glancing at the door. “You were dreaming so loudly it flowed into me. I understand now.”

There was so much he wanted to ask regarding that statement, but they didn’t have the time for nonsense. “Where’s the book?” Nyanko Sensei moved his head and grabbed something from under the bed and dropped it on his lap. Natsume blinked a few times, realizing it was one of Taki’s bags. 

“The Tanuma kid and Taki brat left and came back with this bag. Tanuma even packed some of his clothes so you don’t have to stay in a hospital robe.”

Tanuma and Taki went all the way home and back just for him? His hands gently opened the bag, seeing the clothes, his new phone, and what looked like a protective charm Taki must’ve carved. Feeling even deeper, his fingers grazed the familiar cover of the Book of Friends, making him smile in warmth. 

“I’ll change once we get away from the hospital,” he said, zipping the bag back up. “I’m sure the Fujiwaras will be back any second.” 

“They’re just outside the door, talking to the Police Chief or whoever,” his bodyguard confirmed, moving his head close to the bed. “Can you climb on? If not, I’ll carry you in my mouth.”

“I think… you’ll have to carry me, just until we get out of the hospital cause of the machines,” he admitted as he moved down, seeing the machines and devices still attached to him. He unhooked all of them, leaving the heart monitor to remove last. “Okay. One, two, three-”

The heart monitor flat lined. There was a huge ruckas outside, but he didn’t even get to hear it as he was surrounded by a moist warmth. He clenched the bag as tightly as he could in his hands, feeling the wind brushing against him. 

_ ‘I’m so sorry, everyone. I’ll be back soon…’  _

This time, everything was different. This time he had Nyanko Sensei with him and a rejuvenated spirit. 

He wouldn’t be caught a second time, and he refused to let himself die. There was no way he’d bring his loved ones that kind of permanent sorrow. 


	7. Crawling Towards Freedom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long to write the next chapter. I work at a doctor's office so it's been crazy ^^; Hope you guys enjoy! =D

“I’m surprised no one’s brought this to our attention before,” Nanase mumbled next to Matoba as they both felt the negative energy practically steam from the tops of the towering trees as they stared at the vast forest. They didn’t hear so much as a bird chirp, let alone hear any animals rustling about.    
It was quiet, too quiet. 

“They were probably too weak minded and decided not to deal with it, after all this kind of energy far exceeds that of a corrupted god,” Matoba observed, practically hearing the haunting cries of the ones the Yakuza decided to get rid of. Even he was disgusted that he mostly sensed younger human spirits. “Removing the god will help, but the forest may be beyond cleansing.”

Nanase glanced over at him as her frown deepened. “What a shame.”

“Agreed,” he said as he turned, facing his fellow clansmen who volunteered to help. There were ten in total, far more than he thought would show after the warning he sent. “As I mentioned in the text, due to the nature of this youkai, I cannot disclose any information about this job. However, if any of you come across other humans aside from us, they are to be treated as a threat. If you fail to do so, the result will be your own fault. Capture whatever you find and blow your whistles to signal when you do.”

“Yes sir!” They said in unison.

“Good, now go,” he ordered, watching both his men and shiki head into the forest. 

“Are you sure we shouldn’t have waited until morning? Youkai are far more active at night,” Nanase asked, which made Matoba smirk. 

“That’s what I’m counting on.” If he was sending most of his clansmen into a cursed forest, he wanted to capture as many youkai as he could along the way. “Who knows, someone might find something useful here. Besides, if this curse keeps draining Natsume, we’ll lose a valuable asset, one I’m not willing to give up.”

\---

The wind felt surprisingly nice against his bruised and cut face, his golden eyes closing as he tried to ignore the quivers of pain from various parts of his body along with a chill that crept along his bones. Though he’d never admit it out-loud, he was nervous. Going back to the place he was tortured while his captor was still at large seemed like the most idiotic decision he’s ever made. Granted it was the only decision since there were so many lives at stake. 

At least Nyanko Sensei was with him, this time he wasn’t alone. 

They landed a lot sooner than he expected, though considering how fast Nyanko Sensei could fly, he shouldn’t be surprised. He couldn’t see where they were due to how dark it was, but he could hear someone speaking - someone they knew.

“I’m gonna help you down, okay?” He heard Aoi say, much to Natsume’s surprise. Slowly turning, he saw the crow youkai staring at him with worry, his deep blue eyes shimmering in the moonlight. 

“Aoi?” He softly asked as Sensei opened his mouth. Natsume couldn’t help but grunt as his body started to roll. Gentle cold hands stilled him as the human’s sight went black for a moment, pain wracking his entire body from the movement. 

“I had the Tanuma brat ask him to watch from a distance in case something happened,” Nyanko Sensei informed as Aoi very gently sat him down on a rather large rock. The upright position made the laceration across his chest burn in agony as his ribs screamed in protest. His ears started to ring softly as his sight got a little blurry at the edges. It was nothing he couldn't handle though, pain is only temporary after all. 

“You’ve been out here this whole time?” Natsume asked, feeling horribly guilty as the crow nodded, picking up the bag that had fallen from his arms. 

“Yes, but Kaoru has been keeping me company after school,” he said, watching Natsume’s eyes fall in guilt. After helping them reunite, his condition was forcing them to separate yet again. 

As if sensing his thoughts, the crow gently knelled down, meeting Natsume’s warm gaze again. “Don’t worry about us Natsume, having Kauru visit reminds us of old times. Besides, you’re our friend, we want to help.”

Natsume wrinkled his nose, already knowing he was going to get sick of hearing that phrase. Yet as Aoi continued to stare at him, he knew he genuinely meant both statements. “I’m glad you’re at least having fun,” he managed to smile, a cold breeze making him shiver. Aoi immediately unzipped the bag and pulled out the clothes Tanuma provided, holding up the shirt first. It was a long sleeve button up forest green and black plaid shirt. Not only would it be easy to put on and light against his torn skin, it would also act as a form of camouflage. 

Sliding the hospital robe off the edges of his aching shoulders, Natsume shakingly reached over and grabbed the shirt. Since his left hand had the large cast around his healing fingers, he pulled the sleeve up that arm first. When it came to finding the sleeve for the right, he struggled. It was somewhere behind him, a maneuver his body was finding impossible in his condition.

Aoi smiled very softly as he stood, making Natsume go completely still and groan. He felt horribly embarrassed he couldn’t dress himself. 

“I can accompany you if you’d like,” Aoi said as he helped Natsume’s other arm into the sleeve. “You know how powerful I am. We’ll finish before the sun comes up.”

“No,” Natsume said despite how warm the offer made his heart, smiling up at him. His wrapped fingers clumsily wrestled with the buttons, trying to button at least two himself. “I can’t ask that of you, it’s going to be dangerous.”

“Besides, I already gave you a mission,” Sensei said, already sensing youkai starting to gather around them. “A lot of youkai know Natsume’s in a weak state, and once they realize he’s gone, they’ll frantically search for him.” Natsume’s eyes widened in fear as he looked to Nyanko Sensei, then to the hospital. Would they really attack the Fujiwaras because they couldn’t find him?! “Calm down Natsume, that’s why Aoi’s going to be the Fujiwara’s bodyguard while we’re gone.”

“I’ll protect them with my life,” Aoi sternly said, hating the way Natsume trembled. “Just focus on coming back to us alive.”

His pale lips quivered as his hands fell to his sides, his shirt fully buttoned up. He knew he could trust Aoi, yet part of him couldn’t help but continue to panic. There had to be something he could do, like maybe ask Natori if he could watch over them!

No, wait, once he found out he left the hospital, he’d be  _ furious _ . He’d use one of his paperdolls to hunt him down and drag him back to the hospital no matter what his reason was. It frustrated him. Despite everything they’ve been through, Natori still treated him like a naive child when things got dicey. Yet he understood why. If Natori was in the same situation, he’d probably react in a similar manner. Besides, he was searching for Shirudo with the others.

“Are you okay?” Aoi asked, pulling Natsume from his thoughts. 

“Sorry, yeah,” he mumbled as the youkai pulled out sweat pants. He was so thankful they weren’t jeans because there would’ve been no way he could wear them with the dozens of cuts along the inside of his thighs.

Glancing around the forest, as to be sure there were no humans, he let Aoi help him put them on. If this happened a year ago, he knew he would’ve been too self conscious to accept help without forcing the other to look away. But with all the youkai that came and went, and all the times Sensei, Hinoe and the others helped him quickly get changed as Touko came up the stairs, he was used to it. If this were one of his human friends however, that would be a completely different story. Not only would he be really shy, but he was afraid of being fearful of their touches against his abused body. Of course he trusted them, but he didn’t trust his own reaction. 

“May I accompany you?” Hiiragi’s voice suddenly asked, making Natsume pale. Hesitantly he looked up, relieved to see her alone. If Natori was with her, he wasn’t sure what he would’ve done. 

Aoi glowered at her as he waited to see if she was a threat. Thankful, Natsume placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, making him glance up. “She’s a friend,” he reassured as he bit his bottom lip. “Is Natori around?” He asked, already knowing the answer. 

“No, he went to track down the youkai that cursed you,” she answered as she slowly approached him, respecting his space. “He ordered me to stay and protect you.”

Ordered her, which meant even if he told her she couldn’t accompany them, she’d follow them anyway. It was safer to let her hitch a ride on Nyanko Sensei then have her travel on foot. Besides, if she traveled with them, he wouldn't have to stay in Sensei’s mouth. She could help keep him balanced on his back. 

“Okay,” he sighed, giving her a small smile. “Do you think you can keep me steady on Sensei’s back?”

“Of course,” she said, watching as Aoi slowly helped Natsume stand. His legs were shaky and a nervous bead of sweat trailed down the side of his face, obviously not confident in his ability to stand, let alone walk. The strain seemed to drain him as the color started to leave his face, making her worry. “Are you sure you have to be the one to do this?” She asked, unable to hide her concerned tone. She cared and worried about the reckless boy who was too kind for his own good. He was always so quick to throw himself in harms way to protect others without thinking of himself first. In this case, he couldn’t even defend himself. If he wasn’t so heavily injured, she would’ve drawn the protective charm on his arm like usual. 

It just meant she’d have to be extra diligent to make sure nothing happened to him and be the one to shield him from danger this time.

“Yes, I’m sure,” he mumbled, his eyes meeting her own. They looked clouded and far away, as if he wasn’t fully with them right now. 

“Natsume?” She gently called, growing concerned.

She had every right to be, his mind was slipping away. He felt bound, as if his ankles and arms were tied tightly together despite them being at his sides. The smell of salt water assaulted his sense of smell as the humming of waves started overlapping what Hiiragi and the others were saying, the sensations completely disorienting him. He felt helpless and hopeless, somehow knowing he wouldn’t see Satoshi again today either. 

_ “You and I are so alike,” _ Satoshi’s voice said as he faintly saw the other boy sitting next to him with a lantern at his side. It was pitch black, meaning it was sometime in the middle of the night.  _ “I’ve thought about freeing you, but you have nowhere to go, just like me. Both our fathers are killers who live to cause pain. Even if we managed to get away, we’d just end up in the system, back in their arms.” _ He sighed, still not looking Toshiki in the eyes. _ “You’d be ‘adopted’ and never seen again, facing a fate worse than death.” _ Slowly Satoshi stood and picked up the lantern, still avoiding his gaze as his feet splashed in the ocean water.  _ “It’s probably best if I let you die so you’ll truly be free.” _

“Natsume!” Aoi’s desperate voice pulled him from the memory, his eyesight a little blurry as he felt the youkai’s hands on both shoulders. 

Ah, those must’ve been Toshiki’s memories again. “I’m okay, the curse was acting up again, but I’m fine,” he mumbled as he held his head, still feeling lightheaded. They were running out of time, he could feel his own strength fading. “We should head out.”

\----

Natori sighed for probably the sixteenth time in just the past hour wondering how he ended up with such an entourage. Despite their power, Natsume’s youkai friends did nothing but bicker, reminding him of the useless bodyguard. 

“No wonder he always has a short temper,” Natori mumbled to himself as Hinoe argued with the Middle Ranks over who knew Natsume better. He was learning about a few dangerous adventures his friend had, but that seemed to be the only benefit about the situation. 

“We can still try to lose them if you wish, Master,” Urihime suggested, unable to stand seeing him so down. 

Natori shook his head as he glanced back at them, noting the one with a mustache was still strangely quiet. “We don’t know what we’re up against, it’s best to have as many allies as we can.” He adjusted his glasses as he glanced at the gas station that gave off a dark mournful aura. The police tape around it assured him they were at the correct station from Natsume’s story. He hated knowing he wouldn’t know where to look if Matoba hadn’t called him up earlier: 

_ “Oh? You’re not at the hospital anymore?” Matoba asked, sounding as if he was smirking on the other end of the phone. That fact alone made him clench his fists angrily, knowing the other wanted to say ‘how predictable,’ but didn’t. “How’s Natsume?” _

_ As much as he didn’t want to tell him, he knew they shared the same goal. “Disoriented, but he knows what the curse is we couldn’t lift.” _

_ “Oh?” Matoba said, seeming both impressed and surprised.  _

_ “There’s a minor god bound to a family that can hide anyone or anything from people who are trying to track them down, which means we’ll have a hard time finding it. However if one of the other boys dies, so does Natsume,” Natori summarized. “One of them is in a cave at a beach nearly drowning. Natsume’s friends went to find the kid while I try to find the god.” _

_ Matoba was quiet for a moment as he started reassessing the situation. “What a cruel curse,” he mumbled. “I wonder how this’ll change our dear Natsume.” _

_ Natori growled in anger at Matoba’s insensitivity. “Natsume’s life is at risk and that’s all you have to say?!” _

_ “I won’t let Natsume die, he’s far too useful,” Matoba said, which only made Natori even more furious. “I’ve already narrowed down the search area, I’ll send you to coordinates if you’d like to join the search party. Oh, and don’t worry about the Yakuza, they won’t bother him anymore.” _

He didn’t even get to ask what he meant by that because Matoba hung up, his phone vibrating with the coordinates right after. 

He hated dealing with that guy. 

As he stared into the dense forest that gave off a strong dark aura that screamed stay out, Natori started to feel overwhelmed. If they stepped in there with the intention of finding the deity, they’d instantly fail their mission. Somehow they needed to clear their minds and traverse the forest blindly, as inefficient and dumb as that sounded. One slip up, and their efforts would be for nothing.

Maybe it was best to split up after all. He wasn’t sure if he could trust the other youkai not to think about Natsume’s current predicament. He could see how deeply they cared for him, no matter how odd and suspicious he found that to be. “We should split up in case one of us starts thinking of our goal,” he said, silencing the bickering youkai. “If you slip up, just find your way out and wait for the others.”

Surprisingly none of them complained, instead they cheered and took off into the forest, not even waiting for anyone to say go. Natori sighed and shook his head, though was silently relieved they were gone. 

He could only hope Matoba was having some luck of his own. Typically he didn’t condone his methods, but since it concerned Natsume’s life, all he cared about was stopping the curse. 

\----

Frantic footsteps pulled Taki out of her prayers as she turned away from the shrine she always prayed at, seeing no one other than Tanuma reach the top of the steps. He was out of breath, though didn’t seem at all surprised to see her there. 

Whenever Natsume was involved with youkai and they couldn't do anything to help, they often found themselves at the same shrine, wishing they could do more. It’s the same shrine everyone pitched in to get Natsume the sickness prevention charm when he had a horrible cold.

“You got the call too?” Taki mumbled as she wiped the tears of worry from her eyes, trying her best to smile. They both knew it was forced, so she let it fall, both avoiding eye contact.

“I know he said he’d be fine, and he usually is but…”

“He’s really hurt this time,” Taki finished for him, not wanting to think about it either. 

“Yeah,” Tanuma sighed as he stood beside her, staring worriedly at the shrine. “I had another nightmare last night, one where Ponta couldn’t do anything to protect him since the man isn’t a youkai. I know it’s just a dream, but...”

“I get it,” she said as she slowly put her hands back in the praying position, feeling tears threatening to fall again. “Even though we know he’s fine, it’s still hard being useless.”

Tanuma nodded as he stared up at the sky, wishing he was more powerful. “Maybe we can help the Fujiwaras out, you know, make them some food, get them coffee, small things like that.” Taki turned to him, the idea surprising her. “Helping them through this difficult time is something I know he’d want us to do.”

Taki sniffled as she nodded, knowing how much Natsume cared about the Fujirwara’s happiness. “Yeah, let’s do it.”

\---- 

“We’re getting close,” Natsume said as he opened his eyes, the pain making it difficult to keep them open now. There were some painkillers in the bag, but as tempting as it was to take them, he stopped himself. Somehow it seemed pain was heightening his ability to sense the trail that was leading them straight towards their dreaded destination, and he didn’t dare lose it. 

“Straight ahead?” Nyanko asked as he glanced back at him, to which Natsume nodded. 

Peering down, he felt his heart nearly stop in his chest as his eyes caught sight of a sickeningly familiar building at the edge of the vast forest.  _ “We need help -”  _ he faintly heard the memory echo, his concentration slipping as Nyanko Sensei’s voice got further and further away. _ “We were kidnapped, they’re probably after us,”  _ his memory drowned out the wind, his sight glazing over as he was back in the small gas station staring at the young man with shaggy brown hair and light green eyes who looked like a deer caught in the headlights upon their arrival. A hard knot formed in his throat out of fear and guilt, preventing him from breathing.

The young man was kind enough to help them, and he repaid that kindness by bringing death straight to him.  _ He  _ was the soul reason the kind hearted stranger was dead.  _ He  _ was the one that decided to peek out instead of laying low.  _ He  _ was the one that decided to watch everything through a reflective surface in case the phony officer got too close to the back room. 

_ “Wow, you two got a pretty good kid killed. I couldn’t even tell if he was telling the truth or not, and I’m usually really good at reading people.” _ He remembered the way fear morphed into horror that crawled into his throat, choking him with raw panic as the fake’s eyes met his own through the reflective surface. _ “Then I saw you at the corner of my eye.” _

The officer had a gun-

It was shoved in the young man’s face whose eyes were strewn in terror-

Red sprayed in slow motion as his body slowly started to buckle, the sight too much for him to process despite what he’s seen-!

“Natsume?” Hiiragi’s worried voice pierced his mind. Blinking a few times, Natsume felt her hands gently on his shoulders as Nyanko Sensei landed behind the gas station, which only made him start to panic even more. 

They were behind the gas station, near the place where it went down-!

“We have to go-” Natsume said, his voice breathy and light. “We can’t be here, Sensei, please-!”

Gravity pushed harshly against them as Nyanko did as he asked while Hiiragi tried her best to keep him sitting up as to not agitate his wounds. The pressure made his ears ring and neck groan in agitation, though he was so relieved he didn’t dare complain. 

“This must be the station,” he vaguely heard Hiiragi say, much to his relief. At least he didn’t have to explain. “Are you okay, Natsume?”

“Yeah, sorry,” he said, hating how strong the haunting memory was. If they wanted to save Satoshi and Toshiki in time, he had to do better. “Over there, Sensei,” he pointed to a small path between two trees. “We came out through that gap.” The other didn’t say anything as he merely flew over the path, lowering himself just above the tops of the trees. 

“Straight?” Sensei asked, to which Natsume nodded, the hair on the back of his neck standing on end. Even with Nyanko Sensei and Hiiragi with him, the forest terrified him out of his mind. Not only were the memories making him weary, but the forest itself didn’t feel right. There was an invisible force telling him to turn away while they still could. Undoubtedly Nyanko Sensei and Hiiragi felt it despite their silence. 

They were close now. 

“A little to the left,” Natsume guided as a sharp pain shot across his neck, forcing him to bite his bottom lip to stop himself from touching it.

_ ‘Demon - I’m nothing but a demon-!’ _ Satoshi’s voice faintly cried in anguish as his eyesight blurred again. Slowly the forest faded to a dimly lit room that housed a dozen yard and metal tools, though most had dried blood crusted on them. Natsume felt a spike of fear flare through him as he caught sight of the nail ripper tool sitting on a barrel as Satoshi brushed past it, nearly knocking the barrel and tool over.  _ ‘I need to go before he makes me kill anyone else.’ _ He grabbed something, something that made Natsume pale as remembered-

_ “It’s alluring, isn’t it?”  _

A rope -

_ “What?” The child asked, his voice sounding so fragile. _

_ “Ending it all,”  _ a rope - he grabbed a rope like he had in the memory when he was sincerely considering killing himself!

_ “Yeah… it is.” _

Oh no- they were out of time. 

“Sensei-” his voice was lost as something slammed hard into them, making him weightless as excruciating pain shot through his entire body. He almost missed the sharp hiss of pain that left his bodyguard, one he hardly heard as his body threatened to black out.

Was Sensei hurt?! Fearful he opened his eyes, seeing red on his pure white fur as a large black mass hurled itself towards him. 

“You’re mine Natsume, mine!!” A black hand reached out as they fell, one of those fingers inches from his nose before it let out a howl, obviously hurt. 

“He’s my prey!” Sensei growled, his anger seeping through his voice. “Get lost before I eat you myself!” His bright protective light lit up the sky, but the human was no longer near them as he continued to plummet, already passing the tops of a few tall trees. Despite being used to falls, he was scared. In his state, he didn’t stand a chance of surviving a fall from this height!

_ ‘Touko, Shigure, everyone-’ _ he squeezed his eyes shut, failure gripping his heart tightly. He promised to come back to them, he promised he wouldn’t throw away the happy life he finally found!

“Natsume-” Hiiragi’s voice rang as her gentle arms wrapped around him. Before he could even retaliate he felt them slam into a thick tree branch, the impact knocking the air out of him as they tumbled into another, Hiiragi gasping as she shouldered the impact again. 

“Hiiragi!” He weakly cried as he felt his back slam into a branch, his vision cutting to black. 

\----

Matoba couldn’t help but feel a little weary after searching throughout the night, the negative energy making it harder to concentrate. It almost seemed as if the forest itself was draining some of his energy, which made him wonder if the god’s body was emitting some kind of poison. If he was, it would be useless to them. 

“Did you hear that?” Nanase asked, making him stop in his tracks. Straining his ears, he waited until he heard it - soft whimpers close by. It almost sounded as if the cries belonged to children, but youkai loved to mimic the young to lure unsuspecting humans in. 

“Stay alert,” he warned. They followed the whimpers to a small run down shack that was typically used to protect generators from bad weather. Matoba’s eye narrowed as he realized he didn’t sense anything out of the ordinary, which could only mean one thing. 

“Do you have cell reception?” The clan leader asked Nanase as he checked his own phone.

No service.

“No,” she said, her face going a bit pale as reality started to sink in. 

As much as Matoba wanted to ignore the cries and continue his search since these children were of no use to him, he couldn’t just leave them to die. They were probably victims of the same person who tortured Natsume, a man Matoba wanted to use to feed one of his clansmen’s youkai. Since he couldn’t do that, freeing his victims and thwarting his plans was the next best thing. 

Undoing the four locks that were on the outside door, they managed to pull it open, only to nearly puke from the smell alone. How they didn’t smell feces and bile before was beyond them as they gazed around at the half dozen starving and dehydrated children who looked at them with pure fear and uncertainty. It was enough to sicken even the head of the Matoba clan. 

“I’ll take care of the children, you should continue the search for the god,” Nanase advised as Matoba wearily glanced around. If they found this shack filled with prisoners, it meant they were close. 

“You sure you can handle it?” He asked, his eyes drifting to the abused children again. Some of them seemed too injured to even walk. 

“I’ll manage,” she reassured. “Just focus on our mission.”

\---

The smell of salt water and the sound of crashing waves startled his senses. Slowly he opened his eyes to see a horribly beat boy with shaggy brown hair with hazel eyes sitting on a porch holding a long rope in his swollen fingers. Next to him was Shirudo who was so attentive to the boy he didn’t even realize he was there. Then again, this hazy feeling meant this was probably just a memory.

_ “I… don’t necessarily want to die,” _ the child suddenly said as he gripped the rope so tightly his hands started trembling.  _ “I want to live, I-I want to be loved and cared for. I’m sick of hurting people, I’m sick of being pushed to kill. I want to create life, not take it!” _ He closed his teary eyes as he took a few deep shuddering breaths, seeming to calm down a bit. _ “But... it’s useless. My father’s friends are powerful - they’re everywhere. I wouldn’t last a day without them finding me. I’d be dragged back and severely punished.” _ Hopelessly he buried his face in his legs that were pressed against his stomach in an attempt to feel at least a little bit of comfort.  _ “At least in death, I won’t have to hurt others, and he can’t hurt me.”  _

Natsume took a shaky emotional breath, feeling as if Satoshi’s emotions were his own. He knew how the other felt. Before his life with the Fujiwaras, he thought of death as a way of sparing his family members the trouble of taking care of him. 

_ ‘I’m sorry, Toshiki-’ _ he faintly heard the current Satoshi sob. _ ‘I’m sorry, Natsume.’  _

He blinked, nearly jumping as the god was no longer sitting on the porch but standing a few feet from him. Behind him the memory paused as if the moment in time had been recorded on a VHS tape as lines even started flickering about the scene. 

“We’re out of time, he has everything he needs to end it all,” Shirudo said as he clenched his fists angrily, obviously feeling powerless to save the human he grew so fond of. 

Natsume knew how he felt. He wanted to help Satoshi, someone who just wanted to live for once in his life. Yet even in this dreamscape, he felt his body grow weaker and colder. Cursed or not, his body was starting to give out. “I know. Can you hold him off just a little bit longer?” He asked, his eyes glancing back to the paused young Satoshi. “I’m almost there, but it might take me a few minutes to get to him.”

The god nodded, though was obviously apprehensive. “I will do my best. But once he realizes it’s me, he’ll order me to stop, and I cannot disobey him.”

At least it was something. “I’ll save him, I promise.”

“I know,” Shirudo quietly responded as he raised both hands, gently cuffing Natsume’s cheeks. Almost instantly the human gasped as he felt a surge of energy spike through him, a warmth trying to sooth the chill that was starting to settle over him. 

Slowly Natsume opened his golden eyes, finding his body strangely numb and warm. Carefully he rolled on his side as he started to push himself up, feeling a cold liquid run languidly down his chest.

Crap, he didn’t have to look to know the laceration opened up. They didn’t have a lot of time before both his body gave out and his blood attracted youkai. 

Speaking of youkai- “Hiiragi?” Natsume quietly called as he turned, seeing the other unmoving and littered with cuts and bruises next to him. “Hiiragi-!” Turning some more, he reached out to shake her.

“The hell??” Natsume’s hand stopped dead in its tracks, the voice’s owner alone completely immobilizing him with terror. “What are  _ you  _ doing here?!” Before he could even breath a rough hand wrapped around his throat and yanked him off the ground, forcing him to let out a choked cry. Shakingly his fingers came up and desperately scratched at the man’s clothed arm as he hesitantly opened one of his blurred eyes. It was Toma of course, that killer spark twinkling a little too brightly in his eyes as he felt his back slammed against a tree, forcing the rest of the air to leave his lungs while that insistent ringing blared to life in his ears. 

Squalling of seagulls, crashing of waves, familiar voices very faintly calling out  _ ‘Toshiki’ _ \- 

“-doesn’t matter,” Toma’s voice faintly chuckled, his sweaty face fading in and out with the maddening ringing and visions, the onslaught nearly making Natsume sick. “Now my son can kill you with his own hands-”

_ “I want to live,” _ Satoshi quietly cried as he hazily saw him throwing the rope over a tree branch, those hazel eyes only swimming in more hopelessness. A faint memory came to mind, of him coming home to his previous relative’s house and seeing the Fujiwaras had actually come like Touko had promised. That moment encouraged him to fight to preserve a happiness he’s never known before. 

_ “I want to be loved and cared for.”  _ He saw everyone gathered around his hospital bed with red rimmed eyes and relieved smiles, a sight he never would’ve even imagined if it weren’t for the Fujiwaras taking him in. All it took was a little bit of kindness and love to change his life for the better. 

_ ‘It’s still possible-’ _ Natsume cried as he felt his body pushed forward, his legs nearly giving out as he stumbled. 

“Get moving! Go straight!” The man ordered, ready to push him again if he didn't start walking.

_ ‘It’s still possible to be happy, Satoshi!’  _ Natsume glared up at the man, fear melting into determination. They didn’t have time for this. Satoshi couldn’t hear his thoughts, he needed to hear his voice  _ now _ . “Sensei!” He cried out, watching his tormentor grow confused before cackling.

Dark hopeless memories tried to resurface, but Natsume forced them down. Unlike last time, he wasn’t alone. 

“Doesn’t matter who you brought with you, we’ll just kill them too,” Toma smirked as he loomed over him, that insane twinkle warning him of pain soon to come. “No one cares about a child an orphanage didn’t even know what to do with.” He pulled his leg back, as if to kick.

But he never got a chance. 

A large and heavy gust of wind slammed into them, tossing Toma against the same tree he had pushed Natsume against while the teen collapsed on the ground. Pain started bleeding through his body’s numb disposition, reminding him that they had no time left. 

“Sensei,” he managed to whisper as he slowly rolled onto his side again in an attempt to get up. He caught red at the corner of his eyes though and gasped, seeing more blood staining the side of Sensei’s true form. “Are you okay?!”

“Just a few scratches,” Sensei responded, which only made Natsume worry even more. He said the same thing when Matoba shot him with an enchanted arrow and it took a while for him to heal!

“Is this the scumbag responsible for everything?” He growled, pulling the human from his worry as he could sense the anger emitting from him in waves. If he didn’t choose his next words carefully, Toma might become a permanent missing fugitive. 

“Yes but we’re out of time!” Natsume desperately said as he managed to pick himself up and turn in the direction of the house. “Satoshi’s trying to kill himself!” The powerful youkai turned to him with an unreadable expression, his anger still palpable. 

“Tch,” he grumbled before he was suddenly in Sensei’s mouth again. “I’ll deal with him after this other clown.” 

Natsume had no clue what he meant by that, but was thankful Sensei was being sensible. “See the roof over there? That’s the building!” Without another word Sensei took off, making Natsume glance back the best he could. Leaving Hiiragi behind made him worry about her safety, but at least he’d draw any youkai away from her due to his powerful blood. 

“There!” Natsume pointed as he saw the tree in front of the porch, only to cry out seeing Satoshi jump off a ladder with a rope tied around his neck. Shirudo was on his knees crying next to him, meaning the human must’ve ordered him to leave him alone. “Satoshi no!” A tight pressure squeezed Natsume’s throat, the curse mimicking the cause of possible death within Satoshi. His sudden silence alarmed Nyanko as the youkai hissed, moving even faster. 

The next five minutes were a blur as he felt the deadly grip on his neck disappear, forcing his body to take desperate gulps of air in an attempt to stay conscious. He wasn’t in Sensei’s mouth anymore, he was on the ground next to Satoshi who was in the same blurry state, their eyes finally meeting after a few moments. 

“Natsume?” The broken teen quietly mumbled, still shocked. “How… and why?” His whole body was trembling as he turned his gaze to the ground, clenching his fists as thousands of dark thoughts streamed through his mind. 

Despite wanting to help him, Natsume couldn’t help the natural fear that still spiked through him being so close to the other. He hoped the other didn’t notice, especially since he didn’t blame him for being forced to hurt him. 

“It’s a long story, but we’re here to set you free,” he said, watching Satoshi’s eyes widen in shock as he slowly started to sit up, finding the act nearly impossible.

“What… do you mean?” He asked, his body trembling even more. He was afraid to hope and believe he could ever find happiness after everything he’s done. Natsume knew that look well. 

“When I set Shirudo free, you’ll  _ both  _ be free. No one will be able to find you, not me, not your father, and definitely not the Yakuza.” Those hazel eyes widened in complete disbelief as he shook his head, scooting an inch away. 

“No, I don’t deserve happiness, not after what I did to you, to Toshiki, to everyone,” he quietly mumbled, his eyes once against meeting the noose. “I deserve a fate worse than death.”

“I don’t believe it, and neither does Shirudo,” Natsume sternly said, his fear melting away as he felt his body grow heavier. These weren’t the words of a tormentor, they were words from the tormented. He had nothing to fear. “You’re a victim just like everyone else who was brought here against their will. But unlike them, you remained trapped without any sense of hope or a chance for freedom. You were forced to become the very thing you both hated and feared in order to survive. I can’t speak for the others, but I know I don’t blame you, and I don’t hate you.”

Satoshi shook his head as he clenched the dirt, far too conditioned to truly accept those healing words. “I-”

A loud screech made Natsume freeze, his reaction alarming Satoshi who leaned a little bit forward. “Natsume?”

But he didn’t hear him as he turned, his eyes widening in horror upon seeing that dark mass shooting towards them from the top of the trees, that sharp toothful smirk far too wide to be natural. “Naaattsuumme~!!”

A gust of wind nearly made him fall over as Satoshi let out a surprised gasp. “I’ll eat you for your insolence!” Sensei growled as he slammed into the youkai, his fur turning a little more red where his wound was. It was hard to see as Natsume’s body swayed from the pressure, threatening to give out, but his fear and adrenaline kept him going. If Nyanko Sensei kept this up, he’d make his wound worse! 

“Sensei!” He worriedly cried out, only to stop upon feeling a gentle hand rest against his shoulder. 

“Return my name and I’ll fend it off,” Shirudo promised, pulling Natsume’s attention to the begging youkai, ignoring Satoshi’s confused face just beyond the youkai who settled between them. “Toshiki doesn’t have any time left.”

Right, if they didn’t save Toshiki, risking their lives would be in vain. 

“Okay,” he said, finally turning his attention back to Satoshi. “It’s not safe, I need your help.”

Satoshi stiffened as he swallowed the hard lump of uncertainty in his throat, studying him closely. It wasn’t that he didn’t believe there were youkai around, he was having a hard time believing in himself. 

“What do you need?” He asked as he clenched his fists in determination. Even if Natsume was lying and Shirudo couldn’t protect him from the Yakuza, at least he’d be able to help someone he was forced to torment. 

“I need something from my backpack, can you help me get it off?” He was far too injured to do it himself, and since Hiiragi was still unconscious a little ways away and Sensei was fighting off the darker youkai, he had to put his trust in Satoshi. 

Very slowly, as to not scare the other, Satoshi helped him slide the bag off. Natsume did his best to hide his painful gasps, but he was beyond his limit. Any moment now he knew he’d collapse and fall unconscious as he felt so weak and lightheaded. 

“I got you,” he heard Satoshi gently reassure as he felt himself leaning against him a bit, not even realizing he nearly fell over and that the other was gently holding out the bag to him. 

“Thanks,” Natsume genuinely said with a smile he reached in and rummaged through the bag. As soon as his fingers touched the book, he pulled it out and looked to Shirudo. 

“One who protects me, reveal thy name.” The book turned to the page with his name on it, prompting him to tear it out. It took everything he had to concentrate as his body tried pulling him into unconsciousness again. “Shiru-”

“Stop-!” Satoshi screamed as a loud bang reverberated against the trees, reigniting his senses. The ringing in his ears was gone as his body alerted him to a new sharp pain in his shoulder as something heavy fell against him. Unable to support the weight he fell over, his vision blurring in and out a moment. Boots crunching in the dirt and dead leaves came closer until his bleary eyes caught sight of Toma who was clenching a gun in his hand with a crazy angry look in his eyes. 

“The hell you do that for!?” He reached down, forcing Natsume to squeeze his eyes shut and hold his breath. The weight against him was lifted as his voice came again. “Why’d you protect him?” 

Wait- Natsume opened his eyes and paled, seeing Satoshi’s chest covered in blood as his father’s dry and bony fingers were wrapped around his neck, forcing him to stand despite the way his knees kept buckling. He felt his breath shudder as his fear of Toma kept him paralyzed, his eyes staring at the gun still in his hand.

First Ryuu, the kind clerk at the gas station who just wanted to help, and now Satoshi, his own son who he tortured in an attempt to make him a killer - foreign anger started flaring alongside the fear as he clenched the leaves under his fingers, part of him wishing he could will his body to tackle their tormentor. 

“Answer me!” Toma spat in his son’s face as his body quivered from the shock and pain of the gun shot wound. When he didn’t respond the man angrily pinned him against a tree, just as he did to Natsume earlier. 

_ “Wh-who are you talking to?” Satoshi asked, his voice sounding so shaky and vulnerable. Natsume couldn’t help but glance over at him, offering a warm smile despite how hard it was. _

_ “Someone who’s very worried about you,” he said softly. “Someone who wants to see you free.” _

_ For the first time since his captivity, he saw the pure look of betrayal in Satoshi’s face. “You’re lying!” He angrily cried as he balled his fists, probably tempted to punch him for saying such a thing. “The only one who cared about me is dead!” _

Garnering no response, Toma tsk’ed as he pulled the gun up and shoved the barrel against his son’s shoulder, the other letting out a choked breath. “Answer me now dammit!!”

_ “That’s not true-” Natsume tried. _

_ “Who then, my father?” He let out a fake laugh, his smile broken and dark. “If I ever went against him, he’d kill me himself!” _

“I… I-” Satoshi struggled to speak as Toma’s fingers squeezed his neck even tighter, a whimper being the only sound to come out.

“Spit it out already!” Toma angrily growled, obviously hating the way his son stuttered. 

“He’s my friend-” Satoshi managed out, tears starting to gather at the corner of his eyes. “He came back for me, he cares about me, and he believes I can live freely-” he let out a shrill screech, Natsume’s blurred vision hardly keeping up as Toma slammed the butt of the gun across his face. Blood spewed out of Satoshi’s nose as Natsume’s heart stopped in his chest, mind going blank as powerful emotions surged within him.

His body moved on it’s own, his fingers grasping leaves as he slowly started to rise from the ground.

He saw Toma’s disgusting pleasure as he tore into his thighs, the way his eyes lit up as he whipped Toshiki’s bear back and ripped the youthful skin apart. He saw the insanity along with pain gleaming through Satoshi’s eyes as Toma forced him to remove one of his nails, and the way the fake officer raised the gun to Ryuu’s head without a moment’s hesitation and pulled the trigger.

_ No more. _

Toma pushed the head of the pistol into Satoshi’s blood covered mouth as he cursed his own child.

_ No more.  _

He couldn't take it anymore.

A gust of wind washed over him as his body let go of the dozens of leaves that were clenched in his hands, watching as they cut across Toma’s cheeks and arms. The man let out a surprised wail of pain as he stumbled back, the red glistening leaves turning and swirling around him in a vortex of fury. Each stroke left another deep scratch along his skin, his cries falling on deaf ears as Natsume watched with a void expression, not registering what was happening as his mind continued tumbling through the dark memories of captivity - of what this man did to all of them. 

Someone was shaking him, but it was a voice that pulled him back from oblivion. 

“Natsume! Natsume snap out of it!” Nyanko Sensei - that was Sensei’s voice above them!

Blinking, his mind started to process what happened, only to grow pale.

The leaves- as soon as he realized what he did, they grew lifeless, slowly floating to the ground as Toma, bleeding and shaking, crawled a few feet away. There was terror in those eyes, pure unadulterated terror he used to cause. 

He felt sick - a few moments ago, he wondered if he had enjoyed seeing the fear in those eyes the same way Toma did.

His knees gave out, but Shirudo caught him. “My name-” he gently handed him the book of friends, the page with his name defiled by a few drops of his blood. “Please, return it so I can end this nightmare.”

_ Don’t think about it, not now, _ he told himself as he ripped the page out and put it in his mouth, blowing against it. 

If he let himself think, he’d lose himself. 

The remainder of his energy left him as his whole body became led, his vision desperately trying to black out. He was on the ground now, his blurred vision watching as Nyanko Sensei’s eyes met his own, not seeing the attack coming from the left side of him. He had no strength to warn him of the danger and watched the dark youkai bite hard into Sensei’s side, resulting in him reverting into his cat form.

He was falling. The one who always protected him needed help, and he couldn’t do anything as the dark youkai looked him directly in the eyes.

“I’ve come home~”

A gust of wind made him tightly close his eyes, surprised when he felt someone rest a hand on his arm. “Are you okay?” Hiiragi asked, her voice sounding strained and weak. She was still injured, but she still came. 

“Sensei-” 

“Can you walk?” Shirudo’s voice came from above, stopping Natsume midsentence. As much as he didn’t think he could, he was determined not to be useless. 

“I can try,” he weakly said as he looked to Hiiragi, who seemed to understand. It would be difficult to walk with the wounds along the inside of his thighs, but with her help, surely he could make it.

“Good, I’ll create a path for you,” he said as he quickly landed and set the injured Nyanko Sensei in Natsume’s bag, his other hand reaching out to create a youkai path near them. 

Wait, weren’t they about to be attacked by the other youkai? Glancing up, he grew confused upon seeing the dark mass being squeezed by paper dolls. 

Paper dolls? Weren’t those Natori’s?

“I’ll stay behind and help the exorcists deal with this creature and find you later. I don’t want my powers to prevent help from finding you two.” 

Natsume nodded as much as he could, understanding the sacrifice. Very slowly, and with the help of Hiiragi, he managed to get to his feet, clenching the bag with Sensei and the Book of Friends in one of his hands. Despite how much it hurt, he managed to swing the bag onto his back, his eyes then settling upon Satoshi who was trying to stand.

“We have to go,” Natsume said as Hiiragi helped him over, both of them nearly stumbling a few times. 

“Go? Where?” Satoshi mumbled, his eyes clouded over in pain. 

“Just trust me, okay?” He’d explain later. For now he helped one of Satoshi’s arms over his free shoulder, the stretched angle making the brown haired boy let out a cry. The angle wasn’t good for Natsume either as his legs pressed together and started reopening the cuts between his legs along with agitating the laceration and the newly grazed cut from the bullet. They were both a wreck and hardly conscious, but they still had a chance.

Wobbling horribly, the three of them stumbled onto the path created by the youkai, not daring to look back. They walked for what felt like miles in their condition, and after about six minutes Satoshi started to go limb, nearly making all three of them fall. 

“Hold on just a little longer Satoshi, we’re almost there,” Natsume weakly begged, though he wasn't sure himself. Yet this path was starting to look familiar, as if he knew where it was leading them. Squinting, he started making out the shape of a house, rejuvenating his spirit. 

“There! We only have a few steps to go, stay with us!” He tried to reassure as they stumbled some more, black circles dancing along his vision. Sea, he could smell the salt water despite being nowhere near it again, the smell making his eyes burn. 

Heavy… he was so heavy, but they were here - they were at the sold Natsume house! The small wall that boxed the backyard in was gone, showing they already started renovating the house. He had no clue how Shirudo knew this was somewhat close by, and decided that wasn’t important. 

Satoshi’s body dropped, making him gasp as he fell to one knee as his arm refused to drop the other. “Stay with us,” he somehow mumbled out, feeling Hiiragi’s strength start to wane with his own. “Just… a little further.” Very carefully they climbed the small step, seeing no light or even a handle on the back door. With some difficulty Hiiragi managed to open it with her free hand, allowing the three of them to stumble and finally collapse on the ground. 

They were finally out of the woods and in familiar territory. Natsume felt himself start to slip away as he shivered from both exhaustion and blood loss, allowing images to ensnare his mind. 

_ Water was splashing into his nose, his gagged mouth staying shut to prevent it from getting in. At this point though, he wasn’t sure why he even bothered. No one was coming, no one would find him, so why should he let his misery continue like this? _

_ “I smell a human down there,” a faint voice said, a voice foreign to the child, yet familiar to Natsume. If he wasn’t mistaken, that was Kirinoha, the youkai who wanted to go to the ocean yet was too nervous to do so.  _

_ “You’re right, I smell a human! Go get the others, I’ll see if it’s the child!” Wait, that was - that was the Fox Child’s voice!  _

_ The voices slowly made the starved and dehydrated boy open his red rimmed eyes, surprised to hear something swimming towards him. Did someone find him? Did someone really find him?! _

_ In the faint light, he saw a small fox coming towards him that almost seemed to smile in both happiness and relief. As scared as he knew he should be, he stayed calm.  _

_ His precious friends found Toshiki just in time. Thank goodness.  _

_ “Thank you, Natsume,” Shirudo’s voice faintly expressed as he closed his eyes, the salt water and the sound of crashing waves fading from existence for the last time. It felt like a weight was literally lifted off his chest, his body feeling light and perhaps normal again.  _

_ "Thank you..." _

_ For once in what felt like forever, he dreamt of nothing.  _


End file.
